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Things You Regret You Did
Back in high school there was a friend of mine who had a big huge massive crush on me. I mean she was holding this crush since second grade when I opened her pudding cup for her. During those hormonal years, and talking to my/our friends about her feelings (who urged her to tell me and ask me out). She finally got up enough nerve and confessed her feelings. I tried to let her down easy, I just didn't have the same feelings for her, she was my friend and that was it.

See, she was the kind of girl who would, no matter how bad you felt, she always had it worse. You could cut yourself and she would still have it worse. Grant you she did have it difficult, early on her doctor thought she was deaf, turns out she wasn't, she just didn't pay attention to people all the time and had a speech impediment that when she talked she sounded like a deaf person would. Bad diagnosis.

We still remained friends after she told me, I wasn't going to dump a long time friendship just because we didn't feel the same. I wasn't happy that my friends knew about this and didn't say anything to me. They didn't help matters either, one of my friends I later found out kept urging her on and that she could probably change my mind.

Later at Christmas time we had a party, I really didn't want her to come because she started up with there being an "us" again. Unfortunately she came and stole my Santa hat telling me I could have it back when I kissed her. I told her to keep it. After spending the night of playing musical chairs because she wouldn't leave me alone, I was trying to have a conversation with a few of my friends. She then took the opportunity to jump up and kiss me, then asked me if I felt any different. I was pissed to say the least. She tried to apologize but by then it was too late for me.

She still didn't want to give up so as teenagers do I started to be mean to her. I mean really mean, like throwing pennies at her to make a wish on the fish (she had fish lips). Some of my friends sided with me and would tease her too just to get her to go away. Turns out they really didn't like her very much since she was always such a downer. One time a friend of mine was bouncing a half flat basket ball off the wall, it went the wrong direction and hit her square in the face. We were all shocked at first then started to laugh, she ran off crying.

My brother and another friend of ours decided to play a cruel April Fools joke on her. They told her I really did love her but didn't want everyone else to know. She started to act weird around me and told me what they said. I was furious and told her straight out I didn't love her, I had no feelings for her whatsoever. She didn't believe me so I made my brother and friend tell her the truth, it made her cry. I never talked to her again.

Years later she was working at a mall I frequented, she would try to talk to me but I ignored her. Several years after that I went through a rough patch and looked back a lot on my life. I regretted what I did to her, there was no excuse for it really. One day I stopped to talk to her and told her I was sorry for everything I did. I told her a bit about what I was going through at the time, and she fell pray to her same old self. She made it all about herself and how her life was worse.

I still feel bad about it, she did forgive me and apologized for how she acted, but its still something I have to live with. I was someone I didn't like, even though I was filled with anger at the time. I learned something from that, there was an ugly side to me I never wanted to see again.

So what have any of you ever done that you regret?
Sickos never scare me. Least they're committed.  
Never Give Up!  Never Surrender!

[Image: KqOD7C.gif]
Yes, I was born too soon. Big Grin
Didn't hit a few bullies.
Didn't lift weights that much in high school.
Didn't have a job in high school.
Didn't live my life like a Stoic robot.
Didn't take time off between HS and college.
Regret is a good thing as long as you don't let it define the person you we are now. You seem like you have a very good heart and are open. Thats a big plus. Remember you aren't that person now who acted that way. You have changed because you feel regret and have taken steps to make it right.

My regret is that there was a time when I felt I had to stand up for innocent people who were being unjustly treated or criticized when they had done nothing. I thought I had to put people in thier place when they said hurtful things to others. I was very protective/defensive in that regard. Now that I look back on it, maybe some of them just needed a break. There is a better way. I just didn't get that at the time. So now I try not to focus on whats wrong about someone but, what's right about them. Try to let things that once would have bothered me; roll off my back. Ya know, be like water. Doesn't mean I won't do what I have too if a true need arises. I am just more selective about how I handle things. We all live and learn. Thank you for your honesty and openess. It's good to see that here.

for me its things i regret that i didnt do or pursue.
"Once you assume a creator and a plan, it makes us objects in an experiment." - Christopher Hitchens
i regret way too many things in my life. most of it is regret for things that i could have done, but didn't. i recently read a quote that inspired me to do more things with my life:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

i hope this helps.
The heart knows its own bitterness, and a stranger does not share its joy.
Didn't tell my drunken father to Piss off and pursue my passion as an artist, I was afraid of that guy though. He was a mean drunk and he hit hard. Still, it's life biggest regret for me. I wish I could go back and change it.
"To send light into the darkness of men's hearts - such is the duty of the artist." ~Robert A. Schumann
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is broke
~ Spare
Everyone does things they regret. It is a part of life that is unavoidable. You learned from your mistakes and seem to genuinely feel remorse for what you did and were man enough to apologize for it. That is not always easy and I respect you for being able to do so

As for my own personal regret it would easily be the girl I hurt, nothing profound or deep but it is true. I ruined a good thing with a sweet girl and have messed up my life in the process. I still consider this the biggest mistake of my life. My failures today only further remind me of how stupid I was back then
I regret not telling this one girl I loved her. She was gorgeous, smart, sweet, and interesting. One of a kind. She was the one who liked me first. I turned her down because I was afraid of what might happen with our friendship and I thought we would get kicked out of school. (I go to a Catholic school. No lesbians.)

I've gotten over it since. I've fallen in love with another girl (who I have more in common with). I can see it happening. I just haven't told her how I feel yet. But I think she feels the same way.
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils." - Louis Hector Berlioz
(12-08-2010, 04:33 AM)EveWasFramed Wrote: Yes, I was born too soon. Big Grin

LOL didn't really have a say in that, I know what you mean though.

(12-08-2010, 09:12 AM)AncientBard Wrote: Didn't tell my drunken father to Piss off and pursue my passion as an artist, I was afraid of that guy though. He was a mean drunk and he hit hard. Still, it's life biggest regret for me. I wish I could go back and change it.

That's too bad he was like that. My father was a drunk, he wasn't abusive though as far as I know but he never came to see us much, and when he did he was drunk. It would be nice if we could go back in time and change certain things.

It's good to see a lot of people have accepted the things they regret they did or didn't do, and moving on with your life. Big Grin

Sickos never scare me. Least they're committed.  
Never Give Up!  Never Surrender!

[Image: KqOD7C.gif]

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