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Stuck
#1
Ever feel like you are stuck in the same place for years? Not physically but more in the sense of growing and progressing as a human being.

I have been feeling stuck for years now, like I am not growing or developing at all. I am in the body of an adult but I feel like a child. 

It's like there is conflict inside me. On one hand there is the confident, outgoing, and fun loving persona and on the other there is this child whose afraid; afraid of being hurt, afraid of being himself, afraid of the world and just wants to curl up in a corner with his hands on his ears to block out the voices. 

Enough about me though, does anyone else struggle with something similar? 

I go through my days and nothing changes, I go through the motions, doing what I do day in and day out and at the end of day I feel like nothing happened, nothing changed, I am still the same person I was...i don't like me. I don't hate myself but there is a lot I don't like about myself. I hate that I am afraid all the time. I hate how lonely I am making myself be. I hate how depressed I am even though I don't have much to be depressed about.

Take it easy everyone.

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#2
Most of my life has been doing the same things over and over again. The repetition is deadly dull. I look back on my past and see endless reams of the sameness just stretching out behind me and know that I've got more the same before me. Nothing will change because even when things change around me - *I* haven't changed.

So yeah, I get that.

Sorry. Not sure if that helped you at all.

Edited to add - My daughter just turned 20. Scary, I know. And I asked her how she felt about it. She said that she didn't feel grown up. That she still felt like a child. I told her that there is no magic moment when all the secrets of being an adult are suddenly revealed to us. We're all just children waiting to be told what to do - how to live - who to be. That's what I think anyway.
I'm an Optimistic Pessimist. I'm absolutely POSITIVE that it's all going to go horribly wrong...

Marge: I'm not afraid
Grampa: Then you're not paying close enough attention
(from episode entitled 'Strong Arms of the Ma')
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#3
(02-28-2020, 02:53 AM)I\m Fine Wrote: Most of my life has been doing the same things over and over again. The repetition is deadly dull. I look back on my past and see endless reams of the sameness just stretching out behind me and know that I've got more the same before me. Nothing will change because even when things change around me - *I* haven't changed.

So yeah, I get that.

Sorry. Not sure if that helped you at all.

Edited to add - My daughter just turned 20. Scary, I know. And I asked her how she felt about it. She said that she didn't feel grown up. That she still felt like a child. I told her that there is no magic moment when all the secrets of being an adult are suddenly revealed to us. We're all just children waiting to be told what to do - how to live - who to be. That's what I think anyway.
So I am replying to you both.
I am older than you. And still looking back at my like..yikes..I feel the same way.

And I also see other people who did so much with so little. A whole lot less than what I had/have.
That now I am thinking: is it a personality type? 
And I ask myself again. Those who "did" so much and changed a whole lot. And acheived many things. Are they happy? 
Or do we just look at them and see what we lack and wish we were like them (I mean motivated, achievers..etc..not necessarily v rich or whatever).
Do they feel like they missed a lot too?

Then I think that one should do the best one can with what one has and thankfully we have here to vent.
Sigh

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#4
(02-28-2020, 01:29 AM)Sunless Sky Wrote: Ever feel like you are stuck in the same place for years? Not physically but more in the sense of growing and progressing as a human being.

I have been feeling stuck for years now, like I am not growing or developing at all. I am in the body of an adult but I feel like a child. 

It's like there is conflict inside me. On one hand there is the confident, outgoing, and fun loving persona and on the other there is this child whose afraid; afraid of being hurt, afraid of being himself, afraid of the world and just wants to curl up in a corner with his hands on his ears to block out the voices. 

Enough about me though, does anyone else struggle with something similar? 

I go through my days and nothing changes, I go through the motions, doing what I do day in and day out and at the end of day I feel like nothing happened, nothing changed, I am still the same person I was...i don't like me. I don't hate myself but there is a lot I don't like about myself. I hate that I am afraid all the time. I hate how lonely I am making myself be. I hate how depressed I am even though I don't have much to be depressed about.

Take it easy everyone.
[quote pid='916566' dateline='1582817367']
I suspect some people don't even recognize that they are not learning, growing, changing - they don't even realize they are "stuck".  They may have that feeling of boredom or disinterest but just accept it as the way life is.  So it is good that you have the self-awareness that you have remained in this "stuck" place.  I've heard it said that people are not motivated to change until the pain of staying the same exceeds the fear of changing.  Maybe you have arrived at this changing point.  Now the question becomes what small change do you want to make to start the change process?  
[/quote]
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#5
Edited:Actually, I am referring not to the first poster but to the second one. Why do you feel that your daily repetition is dull and monotonous?  In my case , my daily repetition makes me very happy and very contented.  Let me make the point that there is a difference between repetitive and repetitious.  The difference is that repetitive refers to daily experiences that happen repeatedly.   Whereas repetitious refers to a repeated routine which is tedious or boring.  
So mine is repetitive but it keeps me happy and contented. Whereas yours is repetitious.
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#6
(02-29-2020, 05:30 AM)August Campbell Wrote: Edited:Actually, I am referring not to the first poster but to the second one.  Why do you feel that your daily repetition is dull and monotonous?  In my case , my daily repetition makes me very happy and very contented.  Let me make the point that there is a difference between repetitive and repetitious.  The difference is that repetitive refers to daily experiences that happen repeatedly.   Whereas repetitious refers to a repeated routine which is tedious or boring.  
So mine is repetitive but it keeps me happy and contented. Whereas yours is repetitious.

If you mean me, it's because it IS repetitious. 

It's mostly housework which involves endless loops of doing the same things over and over again as they never STAY done. It's boring, mindless repetition that is only useful in as much as we need clean clothes, food to eat, things to eat off etc etc. I gain no pleasure or even sense of satisfaction from it. 

Does that answer your question?
I'm an Optimistic Pessimist. I'm absolutely POSITIVE that it's all going to go horribly wrong...

Marge: I'm not afraid
Grampa: Then you're not paying close enough attention
(from episode entitled 'Strong Arms of the Ma')
Reply


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