I'm not sure if this question belongs in this section, but here it goes.
I've been a lurker at these forums for about a month or so, and one trend I've noticed is this: whenever advice is offered that suggests that someone (usually the OP) needs to change certain features about him/herself to become more socially acceptable (assuming this is what the OP wants), there is always a group that fervently suggests that its not there fault, that its all societies fault for being too superficial, shallow, etc...
I was wondering what everyone's thoughts on this were. My personal opinion is that while I would not suggest that anyone change their core personality just to become more popular (baring the most extreme cases of ODing on solitary hobbies), I would say that there is a very important difference between a social preference, and a and a social weakness: the former can be a (solitary) hobby that you enjoy, or maybe wanting to have some time to yourself from time to time. The latter, on the other hand, is more along the lines of being socially awkward/isolated to the point of missing out.
So in my case, I like topics such as astronomy and history; these are stuff that I might research by myself in my free time. I would NEVER ditch these interests just to gain additional friends, because I find them fascinating and intriguing. However, on the flip side, I would admit that these subjects aren't always the best avenues through which to meet new people (though sometimes they are). So, among other things, one of my new years resolutions is to learn how to play either the guitar or the keyboard, which along with solitary enjoyment, is more likely to lead to meeting and connecting with more individuals.
I've been a lurker at these forums for about a month or so, and one trend I've noticed is this: whenever advice is offered that suggests that someone (usually the OP) needs to change certain features about him/herself to become more socially acceptable (assuming this is what the OP wants), there is always a group that fervently suggests that its not there fault, that its all societies fault for being too superficial, shallow, etc...
I was wondering what everyone's thoughts on this were. My personal opinion is that while I would not suggest that anyone change their core personality just to become more popular (baring the most extreme cases of ODing on solitary hobbies), I would say that there is a very important difference between a social preference, and a and a social weakness: the former can be a (solitary) hobby that you enjoy, or maybe wanting to have some time to yourself from time to time. The latter, on the other hand, is more along the lines of being socially awkward/isolated to the point of missing out.
So in my case, I like topics such as astronomy and history; these are stuff that I might research by myself in my free time. I would NEVER ditch these interests just to gain additional friends, because I find them fascinating and intriguing. However, on the flip side, I would admit that these subjects aren't always the best avenues through which to meet new people (though sometimes they are). So, among other things, one of my new years resolutions is to learn how to play either the guitar or the keyboard, which along with solitary enjoyment, is more likely to lead to meeting and connecting with more individuals.
