You seem to be at the low end of something. If you can't see yourself making another person feel this bad, were the roles reversed, then you've still got your dignity and it's clear who the rubbish really is. But what does dignity get you? The more character you have, the more the world is going to hate you and get you down. This is bigger then you. You can pretend you're all alone on this battlefield, but you still have to pick a side. If you don't you'll get one by default and not who you are or what you're fighting for. You will be grouped according to uniform, even if naked. Friends come and go, allies fight alongside and go to the grave together. It's the difference between life and death, between wandering around in a fog of confusion and knowing exactly what you're doing. What does reclusion get you? A state of limbo without purpose. What is a friendship anyway, but a temporal alliance based on mutual circumstance. If you want a friend you can value for life, thats as different as marriage vs a one night stand. It has no chance of working out at all unless you're intentions are clear and your friend feels the same way. Why do friends part ways? It's because deep down they were on different sides all along. People grow and change. How they grow is key to understanding them. Allies only change when you switch sides.
