i just recently have become alone for the first time in my life. i am 26 and after a series of failed relationships, i am left alone. thank god for my two kitties, otherwise i fear what my frame of mind would be.
i just do not know what to do with myself.
i work 2 jobs, i am a full-time graduate student, so my time is occupied. i do have some fun-loving friends so my weekends are moderately social when i am not working or studying.
but when it comes time to "be myself;" not a worker, not a daughter, not a student, or a friend, just ME, i dont know what to do.
i watch a lot of movies. i feel like i could be doing more productive things, art or hobbies, but i feel so empty... so void of purpose as an individual i just cannot muster up the motivation to do anything at all.
i feel so alone. i have never been so simply ALONE and my thoughts scare me sometimes. i have never sat in the silence before and i think i am realizing that i really dont like it. i know this is a necessary process for an adult to go through but i am nervous, sad, and ignorant as to what is to come, both for and from me.
just some words of encouragement would be nice. i cant tell my friends and family how i feel or i would look like an unbalanced mess...
which, by the way, is exactly how i feel.
i just do not know what to do with myself.
i work 2 jobs, i am a full-time graduate student, so my time is occupied. i do have some fun-loving friends so my weekends are moderately social when i am not working or studying.
but when it comes time to "be myself;" not a worker, not a daughter, not a student, or a friend, just ME, i dont know what to do.
i watch a lot of movies. i feel like i could be doing more productive things, art or hobbies, but i feel so empty... so void of purpose as an individual i just cannot muster up the motivation to do anything at all.
i feel so alone. i have never been so simply ALONE and my thoughts scare me sometimes. i have never sat in the silence before and i think i am realizing that i really dont like it. i know this is a necessary process for an adult to go through but i am nervous, sad, and ignorant as to what is to come, both for and from me.
just some words of encouragement would be nice. i cant tell my friends and family how i feel or i would look like an unbalanced mess...
which, by the way, is exactly how i feel.