Are there others like me

[murdoch]

I feel like I live a very abnormal life. I'm married; don't have children. I'm an only child and my parents are dead. My husband's parents are also dead and he doesn't have much contact with his brother. I have NO friends. I work from home and I go days without talking to anyone but my husband.

I volunteer for a suicide prevention hotline and sometimes I will go days without talking to anyone but my husband until I go to the hotline and talk to suicidal people. I'm in a book club and sometimes I go to hotline events and socialize with other hotline workers.

I feel like I'm the only person in the world who is this cut off from people. I feel like everyone else has fullfilling family and social lives. I get really down on myself and wonder if God is punishing me or something. I'm like Charlie Brown with a rainy cloud following me wherever I go.

I've done everything my therapist has suggested in an effort to make friends, but still...nothing. People like me and think I'm nice, but no one ever wants to do anything with me socially.

Anyone else having this experience?

 

[one lonely guy]

Aside from the 'married' part I'm a mirror image.

I turned out to be an only child (brother's suicide), and both parents are dead.

I retired from (quit?) my job which was as lonely & isolating as my home life. While I've never regretted doing that - I can make do financially (barely) - it hasn't netted me any new meaningful friends, despite being a member of some 10 clubs of various sorts. Everyone seems to like me, I consider myself likeable and interesting, but virtually nobody wants to make 'the connection'.

On the rare occasion when the connection is made, it falters and fails before long. (The reason I got on here today is that one of these real rare connections seems to be waning, and bringing down the fragile social network I have in the group I met her in. Nothing about meeting new people ever seems simple for me.)

The few remaining relatives I have at great distances don't/won't communicate (with one exception).

Like you I've followed all my counsellor's advice, but results are slim to none. I don't do suicide hotline work, but attend numerous support groups. Still the meaningful connections don't seem to come.

It's frustrating as hell, but you just have to keep trying, as I do. What's the alternative?? I'm no longer a spring chicken, which increases the difficulty.

olg

Anyone else having this experience?

 

[Minus]

I feel like I'm the only person in the world who is this cut off from people.

No, there are some of us who consider our few seconds of chat with the cashier at the grocery store to be our social event of the week. I did talk to the security guard at work for about 20 seconds last Sunday.

 

[evanescencefan91]

I've done everything my therapist has suggested in an effort to make friends, but still...nothing. People like me and think I'm nice, but no one ever wants to do anything with me socially.

i can really relate, it drives me crazy i'm funny, and people even admit i'm bril

but when it coems to hanging out it's just a shoulder shrug, i'm sorry things are like this for you

*hugs*

have you thought at all about maybe getting a pet?

how come you don't have kids? you could always adopt, which would be great there are plenty of children in the world who could use a person as kind and caring as you

 

[Solace]

I'm in somewhat of the same situation as far as people like me, but I never feel a connection with anyone.

Maybe you should um. is there any type of team something you could join? there are all kinds of teams. there are volunteer teams, building teams, or sports teams or bingo teams lol.

look for a team. Teams are supposed to make you connect with people, if only for one purpose. Perhaps it could be a start.

 

[kfccruelty]

yes, I can relate to what you have said too. I feel very cut off from others as well and the couple of times that I actually put myself out there for people recently (one of which includes someone from here) has not turned out well. That sort of thing makes it more difficult to want to put myself out any further.
At least you have your husband. there are those that do not even have that.
I give you alot of credit for volunteering on the suicide hotline. You sound like a really nice person.

 

[Oceanmist23]

Hey Murdoch and welcome to the forum
I'm not in the same situation as you except that people seem to like me too,
but do I ever get a call or request to do something with others? No. And I don't understand why.
I'm starting to think people with plenty of friends are scared of making new friends for some weird reason.

I've actually had much more luck getting a deeper connection with people online from this forum than in real life.
Because of this forum I now have a few people I talk to on a regular basis, and I'm happy to call them my friends.
I know I can talk to them about anything, just like they can to me.

I hope you can find someone to connect with.

*Hugs* and best wishes

 

[Unacceptance]

I don't even have the spouse to talk to.

 

[travis]

I feel like I'm the only person in the world who is this cut off from people. I feel like everyone else has fullfilling family and social lives. I get really down on myself and wonder if God is punishing me or something. I'm like Charlie Brown with a rainy cloud following me wherever I go.

I've done everything my therapist has suggested in an effort to make friends, but still...nothing. People like me and think I'm nice, but no one ever wants to do anything with me socially.

Anyone else having this experience?

I understand this completely, although I don't have a spouse.

 

[Bluey]

I don't even have the spouse to talk to.

Me nether but I do have a mum and dad. Don't live with them but if I needed anyone for an emergency then there only a phone call away. At least I have that.

 

[DixieDarlin]

Not married, no boyfriend, i have parents and family though, but I only communicate with them on my days off and usually it's just my mom. I talk to people at work and they all seem to like me and all, they just never involve me in any of their "after work" activities. If I'm so nice and easy to get along with, then why don't they wanna hang out with me?

It's gotten to where I think of the Wal-Mart greeter guy as an old friend, LOL. And I always chat up the cashiers.

 

[Nyktimos]

Sometimes the person you are with can dominate your life so much you lose touch with the rest of the world. And the worst part is, they don't see it if they are getting what they want.

It can become harder to connect with people when you only have limited time.