Avoiding Nights Out

[Suntory]

I recently moved homes, leaving behind everything and hoping to start over, in a way. I moved jobs too, and get on okay with the people down here. Nothing phenomenal, but decent.

Problem is they all obsess over going out for "massive nights" at clubs etc. not all the time, but that's literally all they do as a group. And I hate clubs. I never really enjoyed them but used to go along anyway, and had some fun with my Uni friends.

I drink very rarely now, and have come to hate getting drunk and feeling like crap the next day, so much so that I have no wishes to 1) get drunk and 2) go out into town. Partly too I worry way too much about not fitting in on a night out here. I've never been someone who floats around clubs pulling every girl in sight either - something distancing me further from the guys here.

So I end up struggling to make excuses. Work next day, tired etc. And another potential source of friends slowly fades away.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

How about you organize a group activity for an interest you have?

 

[Tiina63]

Maybe you could try to get to know some of your co workers on a more individual basis. Find out if they have any common interests with you. One or two of them could be feeling the same way as you do, but be going along with the group to fit in and not be isolated. Or even if they do all enjoy clubbing, some may have additional interests and you could plan some separate outings with these people.

 

[Saucer]

I know how you feel, I am not the least interested in the whole clubbing thing and getting drunk myself and that really blocks off a big chunk of the social life of our common culture.

I'm not really gonna be able to give you any solid advice on this matter for I am having similar problems, but since going out drinking is such a big part of the social life one can make compromises if there are any co-workers who are more open to sitting down and simply having a beer at a pub or some quieter place.

All you can really do to find another option for socialising with them is to talk to them and find another common interest like Tiina suggested.
If engaging them in conversation directly feels hard maybe you could try and get on the topic during lunch or something along those lines.

 

[Sci-Fi]

You're still in that age range where most are still wanting to party, eventually it will fade away but until then you either just have to wait it out or try to find more like minded people.

 

[perfanoff]

Nights out are overrated. What I dislike about them is, all of the friends that would like to hang out at a bar just want to go there to look for women. It ruins the fun and spontaneity for me.