Unacceptance said:
Katia said:
Unacceptance said:
What ever happened to hitting back or ignoring?
Not everyone is a brick wall.
You can't always ignor bullies, especially "Cyber Bullies", they can have the power to turned others against you..
You're probably know there's the ignore button on most forums.
And you probably had use it before.
Never the less this will still leave you with a feeling of being less than a human being.
After all why should you have to hide or feel ashame of yourself for other's shortcoming.
This will also generate unresovled anger or pain inside a person.
So a part of you wants to stand up for yourself and defend yourself.
Standing up for yourself can be difficult depending how much
guilt (fualt guilt) and fear you've experince in your life.
Your self esteem hinges on you standing up for yourself.
So you lash out....releasing your unrsolved pain at the bullies.
Right or wrong...at least the bullie knows you confronted them
on thier bullshit.
However...this is also the fuel that bullies use to bullie you
even more. Depending on the indiviual being bullied...this can leave lasting
psyhcological and emotional scars.
It's best to seperate or LET GO to stop the cycle of abuse at this juncture.
In this way ..YOU ARE TAKING BACK YOUR POWER.
"It takes two to mingle"...whatever slogons that will assist you to stop fighting.
If as a child or all your life you where told that it's not okay
to get angery...You will try to deny your anger. If you stuff
your anger it will lead to depression. Once in a depressed state
of being you're self esteem is deteriated. Some people surpress
their feelings by using drugs or alcohol to numb out and cope.
In a nutshell getting bullied is getting obpressed or depressed.
It is this that I've learn in my recovery.
"IT IS OKAY TO FEEL ANGERY"
I had to accept that fact or truth that there's layer and layer
of anger barried deep inside of me.
And it scares me..becuase I'm not a violent person.
However I had to find a healthier ways to process and release my
anger.
Sometimes I write. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I channel my
anger into something positive...such as writing my music.
As you are doing now...You're releasing your anger in a positive
way by posting this thread. Keep up the good work.
As I got more well or better. I was able to use my living skills or coping tools.
LOVE myself and formost. This helps rebuild my self-esteem.
Once my selfesteem gets better...I'm able to say "NO ONE DEFINES ME".
In other words..i don't give a fresia what anyone thinks or talk about me....(bullies no longer have powers over me)
" ITS NONE OF MY BUSSINESS WHAT OTHERS THINK OF ME"
"I"M NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR OTHERS ACTIONS"
'I"M NOT A BABY SITTER"
" IN ONE EAR AND OUT THE OTHER"...ignore bascially.
"I'M TEFLON MAN....NOTHING STICKS TO ME"
" DON'T LET PEOPLE RENT SPACE IN YOUR HEAD"
" I"M BURNING DAY LIGHT ".....it's a waste of my time, life and energy to play with bullies.
Last but not least " fresia OFF ..EAT honeysuckle AND DIE".
Nope...I don't have a wall. I have FILTERS or healthy boundaires.
I surround myself with people that will help me and love me....such as my recovery friends.
Be well