By choice...by design...

[Guest]

Why are we lonely people?


In my case its a combination of my lack of social skills and fear of rejection Tottaly my fault. And the fact that i dont play the game that everyone plays with eachother. I find the world to be very superficial and i just cant follow those rules.I feel that his cruel world is responsible for my low self esteem. Its not my fault, ther eis nothing wrong witht he way I think.


I can chose to change myself...  

I can get out there do things meet ppl and get over my fears, but ill be secrificing myself at the same time. It is tottaly by choice that i am a lonely soul.

whats your situation? are you lonely by choice.. or by design. meaning.. wer eyou put in this situation by outside forces.

 

[Guest]

Outside forces... it was sort of a gradual thing, over time.. I've never been able to make friends easily, and would usually get scared in front of people when i was younger, but I wasn't as bad as I'm now. Now, I lie all the time, whenever i meet new people, about .. how cool my life is, how busy I am all the time, about how I party every friday and saturdaynight.. blah blah.

I don't know, I guess i can befriend these people, hang out more than once over a cup of coffee, and probably discuss the latest movie releases, or celebrity gossip or whatever.

It's just that I'm not like that. All i want is a conversation that does not consist of mindless banter about hair, nails (I'm a girl..talking about other girls) clothes, fashion( i hate the word).. And if it's a guy, well I haven't liked any guy in a long time now.

Or maybe it's just that.. I'm too tired to try anymore. I don't feel like making small-talk.. worrying of the other person is liking me.. Do I look good.. are my hair fine..

I don't wanna look OK.. I wanna be in my pyjamas all the time.. I hate shopping and I hate getting my hair done.. Especially since it symbolises my characterization as a mere object.

So basically, what started out by "design" as you say.. is sort of a choice too.. but you have to know where you stand.

If you're lonely because you don't fit into the party crowd, it's a different loneliness.. if you're lonely because you just can't find a single person capable of a conversation that might indicate that they do in fact have a brain.. well that's different. And I guess harder to bear..