Does anyone else feel like they don't fit in anywhere?

[Mikey193]

Not right now. But I hope I will when I go back to school.

You will, and if you don't right away, just remember stay true to youself.

Thanks.

Yeah don't dumb yourself down to fit in. You don't have to do what everyone else is doing to be cool. Just be yourself and fresia everyone else lol.

 

[Lonely in BC]

Like Nilla, I was always the black sheep of my family... for more reasons than one...but instead of rock and metal (those were okay), I listened to rap and opera.
I used to fit in with other people, ranging from preppy people to the druggies.
Now, I don't seem to fit anywhere. Although, I don't really try anymore, so that's probably why. My personality is hard to tolerate for most.

I can relate to being the black sheep of the family. Growing up and up til high school I was the "goody goody" and the traditional one. Beyond that time, I was still a little "goody goody" but with a twist. I would be traditional but with my twist and that didn't sit well with alot of people. (because what would so and so say) I don't care in regards to what people say or think because I won't be ruled by what "everyone" thinks or does. Hence it's hard to fit in anywhere.

My point is why should you have to try? (to fit in) I find that more and more people are losing compassion for others and I find that very sad. I find that when I'm compassionate, open and understanding, I'm met with cynical and negative responds (with people I'm trying to re-connect with) With new people that I meet, the response is more like "who is this weriodo?"

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I long ago came to the realization that the world has to fit itself to me

It's a long and lonely road sometimes.....

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Thank you everyone for your input. I guess for me it's harder because my husband has many friends and can quickly make friends. The problem is that he will complain about them and when I say "then why are you friends with this person?" he responds with "you don't know because you don't have alot friends to deal with" Which is harsh but true but, then why call someone a friend and then complain about them or be nice to their face but talk behind their back? I hate this behaviour and told my hubby that I would rather have no friends then what you have.

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WOW! Your thoughts and experiences are an echo to my own. I've experienced the exact same scenario you described.

 

[fox]

Well... yes.. in my life, only one person I ever found, accepts who I am and has no interest to change me. I think, perhaps, for me there is only that one person, and to ask more such people.. a group such people, it would be to ask too much. I believe now it is a waste to search for some place I belong, as there is no such place.

 

[Spoon]

Without question, and it's not from a lack of effort. I try to go through the regular social motions, but it's so much of a chore. Social networking, for example. To me it seems less like actual networking, and more like a continual celebration of oneself.

I know more about the eating habits, moods, and daily whereabouts of my 'friends' than the average wildlife researcher knows about their subjects of study. (and i have far more high-resolution images of them in their natural habitats, to boot.)

I don't get it, and the end result is that i'm pretty horrible at it. I wish i could just say "no thanks" to social networking, but to do so in this day and age means being even further alienated.

 

[TheMaul]

There is a common expression that tends to fit me rather well. "I'm too weird for the normal kids and too normal for the weird kids."

YES!!!

 

[markyj82]

Not fitting in is a sign of inner feelings rather than materialistic things, it is great not fitting in you are unique

 

[joejoeyjoseph]

... it is great not fitting in you are unique

Unique is good and all... but I feel like the more unique I am the less enjoyable my presence with others will be. Maybe my ideology is skewed but I always notice that because I'm unique I have little conversation to offer that isn't totally boring to someone else because it's either something I have to teach them or a dialog full of jargon they wouldn't understand unless I did teach it to them.

I'm into engineering. Most people aren't. If someone asks me what do I do for fun I start talking about microcircuit repair or swapping out old components on printed circuit boards... It's honest and unique but definitely not cool to 99% of people I talk to and they judge negatively because of that and don't include me in future shared time with them and their "groups". And then the "I always say stupid things" sets in shortly thereafter...

 

[Equinox]

You know that one piece from a jigsaw puzzle that never fits anywhere? That would be me.

 

[markyj82]

... it is great not fitting in you are unique

Unique is good and all... but I feel like the more unique I am the less enjoyable my presence with others will be. Maybe my ideology is skewed but I always notice that because I'm unique I have little conversation to offer that isn't totally boring to someone else because it's either something I have to teach them or a dialog full of jargon they wouldn't understand unless I did teach it to them.

I'm into engineering. Most people aren't. If someone asks me what do I do for fun I start talking about microcircuit repair or swapping out old components on printed circuit boards... It's honest and unique but definitely not cool to 99% of people I talk to and they judge negatively because of that and don't include me in future shared time with them and their "groups". And then the "I always say stupid things" sets in shortly thereafter...

When you don't fit in this happens. Don't worry about being cool, I was well known for many years then changed my ways and now only have a few real mates. Talk about whatever you feel like and dont worry what other people think.

 

[sunshinemisa]

Like Nilla, I was always the black sheep of my family... for more reasons than one...but instead of rock and metal (those were okay), I listened to rap and opera.
I used to fit in with other people, ranging from preppy people to the druggies.
Now, I don't seem to fit anywhere. Although, I don't really try anymore, so that's probably why. My personality is hard to tolerate for most.

I can relate to being the black sheep of the family. Growing up and up til high school I was the "goody goody" and the traditional one. Beyond that time, I was still a little "goody goody" but with a twist. I would be traditional but with my twist and that didn't sit well with alot of people. (because what would so and so say) I don't care in regards to what people say or think because I won't be ruled by what "everyone" thinks or does. Hence it's hard to fit in anywhere.

My point is why should you have to try? (to fit in) I find that more and more people are losing compassion for others and I find that very sad. I find that when I'm compassionate, open and understanding, I'm met with cynical and negative responds (with people I'm trying to re-connect with) With new people that I meet, the response is more like "who is this weriodo?"

---

I long ago came to the realization that the world has to fit itself to me

It's a long and lonely road sometimes.....

---

Thank you everyone for your input. I guess for me it's harder because my husband has many friends and can quickly make friends. The problem is that he will complain about them and when I say "then why are you friends with this person?" he responds with "you don't know because you don't have alot friends to deal with" Which is harsh but true but, then why call someone a friend and then complain about them or be nice to their face but talk behind their back? I hate this behaviour and told my hubby that I would rather have no friends then what you have.

---

---

WOW! Your thoughts and experiences are an echo to my own. I've experienced the exact same scenario you described.

---

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Are you sure you aren't my long lost twin? lol!!

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Without question, and it's not from a lack of effort. I try to go through the regular social motions, but it's so much of a chore. Social networking, for example. To me it seems less like actual networking, and more like a continual celebration of oneself.

I know more about the eating habits, moods, and daily whereabouts of my 'friends' than the average wildlife researcher knows about their subjects of study. (and i have far more high-resolution images of them in their natural habitats, to boot.)

I don't get it, and the end result is that i'm pretty horrible at it. I wish i could just say "no thanks" to social networking, but to do so in this day and age means being even further alienated.

That's so sad but so true isn't it?

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Not fitting in is a sign of inner feelings rather than materialistic things, it is great not fitting in you are unique

I really like that!!

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You know that one piece from a jigsaw puzzle that never fits anywhere? That would be me.

Ah.. but it just means that you are in the wrong puzzle box. (sorry my sense of humour might be a little off) I often feel that way too.

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... it is great not fitting in you are unique

Unique is good and all... but I feel like the more unique I am the less enjoyable my presence with others will be. Maybe my ideology is skewed but I always notice that because I'm unique I have little conversation to offer that isn't totally boring to someone else because it's either something I have to teach them or a dialog full of jargon they wouldn't understand unless I did teach it to them.

I'm into engineering. Most people aren't. If someone asks me what do I do for fun I start talking about microcircuit repair or swapping out old components on printed circuit boards... It's honest and unique but definitely not cool to 99% of people I talk to and they judge negatively because of that and don't include me in future shared time with them and their "groups". And then the "I always say stupid things" sets in shortly thereafter...

When you don't fit in this happens. Don't worry about being cool, I was well known for many years then changed my ways and now only have a few real mates. Talk about whatever you feel like and dont worry what other people think.

I totally agree with that!