emotional affairs

[Nina]

Just_some---I read that last remark and it made my day!!! Gotta love some dude with a sense of humor and brutal honesty!

Vanilla--After I got done laughing at," the sledgehammer-dude" from up above, I read your reply and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy...Thanks...I'll eventually figure out how to take that good advice too!

 

[EveWasFramed]

*raises eyebrow*

 

[cheaptrickfan]

*raises eyebrow*

lol Eve. You are so eloquent with that eyebrow.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Yes, an eyebrow raised, can say so much....

 

[cheaptrickfan]

Yes, an eyebrow raised, can say so much....

I like to use the over-the glasses glance. It's pretty effective. Most times I don't even have to shake my finger at people.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Yes, an eyebrow raised, can say so much....

I like to use the over-the glasses glance. It's pretty effective. Most times I don't even have to shake my finger at people.

lmao! I've seen that finger-pointing pic. It's AWESOME!

 

[VanillaCreme]

Yes, an eyebrow raised, can say so much....

I like to use the over-the glasses glance. It's pretty effective. Most times I don't even have to shake my finger at people.

Oh dear, that made me quiver, and I didn't even do anything.

 

[mintymint]

If you love them and you want to get into their pants, they're more than a friend. Maybe my litmus test is a bit blunt, but it's still an affair. It's still a betrayal. There's no place for it in a healthy relationship.

 

[Nina]

LOVED the eye-brow...and peering over the glasses...Yup those two looks sum up a LOT! Made me back a couple of paces away from the computer...Everytime my mom did those looks I sat in my room for a weekend... Thanks for memories though, scarey as they were...

mintymint. The way an "emotional affair" was presented to me was a very deep emotional tie to a person. I have an incredibly deep bond with a gay fellow I went to HS with a LOT of years back. I'd kill for this man and he for me. I tell him, if not everything, then pretty close to it.

I don't want to sleep with him and know he doesn't want to sleep with me. BUT, A person I was tossing the concept around with this morning assured me that THIS was an, "emotional affair" It only feels like a deep bond to me, like a sibling sort of bond. I just wanted to get a feel for what others thought. I do agree, if you want to be in their pants...the friendship boat has left the pier....

 

[EveWasFramed]

affair: a romantic or passionate attachment typically of limited duration.

*shrugs* Dunno if merriam-webster is an authority on what the word "affair" means....

Wiki seems to have a good take on it...


An "emotional affair" is an affair, which excludes physical intimacy but includes emotional intimacy and can begin as innocently as a friendship. It may also be called an affair of the heart. Where one partner is in a committed monogamous relationship, an emotional affair is a type of chaste nonmonogamy without consummation. When the affair breaches an agreement in the monogamous relationship of one of the partners to the affair, the term infidelity may be more apt.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Oh, and this is also from Wiki...I found it fairly interesting, though i wont vouch for the validity...

I thought the sections I have underlined were espescially interesting.

David Moultrup has broadly defined an extramarital affair as

a relationship between a person and someone other than (their) spouse (or lover) that has an impact on the level of intimacy, emotional distance and overall dynamic balance in the marriage. The role of an affair is to create emotional distance in the marriage. The critical principle to consider is the possibility of unconscious emotional benefits gained by the uninvolved spouse. The goal of therapy is to resolve the intimacy problems in the couple relationship so that an affair will no longer be 'needed.' This model does not consider the possibility of accidental affairs nor those that arise out of individual pathology or habit rather than relationship difficulties.

This viewpoint does not require sexual play or sexual intercourse in order to define the presence of nor the impact of an affair on a committed relationship. Moultrup is the author of 'Husbands, Wives & Lovers' [1] and has contributed to 'The Handbook of the Clinical Treatment of Infidelity'[2].

An emotional affair has the capacity to injure a committed relationship sometimes more than if it were a one night stand or about casual sex. There is a gender difference in perceptions of harm. Research has confirmed that 'men are especially bothered by evidence of their partner's sexual infidelity, whereas women are troubled more by evidence of emotional infidelity.'

 

[mintymint]

That's a good definition. Yeah, it doesn't have to be a sexual thing per se. But I still like the idea of getting into pants

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

That's a good definition. Yeah, it doesn't have to be a sexual thing per se. But I still like the idea of getting into pants

lol

 

[Lonesome Crow]

mmm...you mean an emotion affair is when my ex-wf calls me in the middle of the night
and have interesting communications with me , when her husband is strairing at the fucken
big screen? I can make her cream in her pants just talking to me....
fresia it...he can be her husband. I hated being her husband.
I ma her lover...

NO EVA....lol
I'm still in love with her and I will always be in love with her. (it's kind of retarded)
However, if I we were married...I'd eat like a pop tart.
Oh wait...nibble behind her ears or take her dancing all the time. She loves dancing and being made love to.
It's something I do'nt really need to work on...it's natural. I'm totally fixated and madly in love with her even after all these years.

 

[Nina]

Lonesome Crow--
You're such a character. Your posts always make me smile. It's never retarded to love someone. As far as I can see, it was her loss to lose you to the guy watching tv...

 

[hipertogbog]

My wife has finally confessed to having an emotional affair with his co-worker.She says they haven't had sex yet but they've been talking dirty through e-mail, text and at work.I'm curious about how people feel about emotional affairs compared to sexual affairs. Do you think they are just as bad or worse than the physical affair?

 

[Minus]

 

[Nina]

Minus---Lmao @ the eye's! Just the right amount of worry and guilt in them....

 

[EveWasFramed]

My wife has finally confessed to having an emotional affair with his co-worker.She says they haven't had sex yet but they've been talking dirty through e-mail, text and at work.I'm curious about how people feel about emotional affairs compared to sexual affairs. Do you think they are just as bad or worse than the physical affair?

Wait...what about your two girlfriends, from the other thread?

Just skip the BS and post your spam link so we can all move on. lol

 

[EveWasFramed]

My wife has finally confessed to having an emotional affair with his co-worker.

Wait...your wife is a "he" lol?