emotional affairs

[epic fale boy]

that wiki definition does sound a little far fetched (imo lol), as if the dude's trying to drum up support for counsellors... you met a girl you fancied at work? You need counselling (only $200 an hour). You kind of got horny watching Peter Andre home alone? You need counselling (only $200 an hour). You've been talking to a pal coz the in-laws are ass-holes? You need beer, it's way cheaper and ten times as fun. Oh, sorry you need counselling to pay for MY beer. (Only $200 (it's expensive beer and after so much counselling I need to get pissed to forget all the crap))

All sorts of outside-the-relationship stuff can impact on emotional distance, intimacy etc. Sheesh, even a new boss pissing someone off might stop them wanting to talk so much with their partner for a while, it doesn't need relationship counselling. Levels of intimacy and emotional closeness are transient, sometimes you can be really close, other times you're both off doing your own honeysuckle for a while.

An affair... it's a loaded word. It's the tipping point we all kind of know, right after we've tipped past it. It's more than a friendship, by definition. If it was a friendship it'd be called a friendship. If it's screwing, it's screwing - like someone who's partner can't do it for whatever unfortunate reason. An affair's got that sly little freaking nastiness underneath it.

I guess it's doing something you know would hurt the person you're meant to be with. It's cheating. And we all KNOW when we're cheating, whether it's in games or life or relationships. It's the little bit of conscience inside going "uh-oh" that tells you it's an affair... and the heartless bastards who reckon they don't have the little bit of "uh-oh" are lying already, that's where they get their kicks - like an emotional extreme sport seeing how close they can get to the edge without it blowing up.

Of course, if I really knew what the HELL I was talking about... I'd not have been single for like ... *zipsmouth*

 

[EveWasFramed]

.....that sly little freaking nastiness underneath it.

bbbwwwwaaahahahahahahhahahaha...

OMG I'm STILL laughing. lol

 

[Badjedidude]

.....that sly little freaking nastiness underneath it.

Most days I wish I had a sly little freaking nastiness underneath me.

lol

 

[EveWasFramed]

.....that sly little freaking nastiness underneath it.

Most days I wish I had a sly little freaking nastiness underneath me.

lol

:club: Get out of my head.

 

[Nina]

I've really enjoyed reading eveyones thoughts on this topic. I see a level of logic in all that's been said. I have to say I have come away thinking that it's the notion that a deep "emotionally based" friendship, could be misconstued as an "affair" and thus take a bad rap.

In the perfect world all relationships would be completely fulfulling for both parties. This isn't a perfect world. So sometimes we seek out folks who really listen and comprehend what we say. A level of involvement and deep concern goes into any deep friendship. I have friends that I love dearly, but would never sleep with. I know this because it's my CHOICE. I read another thread where what was considered an "emotional affair" became infidelity....If you're gonna cheat, you're gonna cheat no matter what you label "Day #!"

If "emotionally based" friendships lead to infidelity, then so can anything else. I knew a gal who ended up leaving her LTR for a cop who wrote her a ticket. It's always going to come down to the choice of the individuals involved I suppose and how accountable they are for their actions.

Badjedidude & Epic...lmao @ both of you...." Most days I wish I had a sly little freaking nastiness underneath me." Too funny!