Guts Spilled in Anonymity

[ArsenicFaust]

I have severe anxiety issues, I suppose. Even here, I'll either post the first thing I write so I don't sit here over thinking, and then go play my game; or I'll edit and rewrite this thirty times until it sounds almost okay, and passable, and none too crazy (blah blah) before I finally post it.
It's worse in real life. I'm soft spoken, have little control over how loudly I speak, and go through periods where my voice is little more than a whisper. So, not only is it increasingly difficult to just go talk to people, even if I were to, they wouldn't hear me.
I want to be able to fix it without medication, since benzos are highly addictive and I've been down that path with them too many times. I don't know. It's probably just a dumb gripe fueled entirely by doubting myself. Still. The internet has the beauty of relative anonymity; perhaps someone can relate or advise.
(And I am posting the first thing that comes to mind, just so I can forget it, and play an MMO. Yay, nerdiness lasting into adulthood...)​

 

[Brother Karl]

Hey, I unreservedly like everyone who plays MMOs, just so you know Which do you play?

Maybe you could practice talking outloud to yourself? I dont know what else to suggest.

 

[tehdreamer]

I have trouble speaking up too. To me, I'm plenty loud enough, but others seem to have a hard time understanding me. Unless I'm pissed, then you'd swear I was using a bullhorn

It helps to practice just talking to people. Anyone. But in a situation where it doesn't matter if you mess up or say something stupid. Like talking to family or a close friend. I've learned to get a little louder, so I think anyone can learn it too.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

I second Brother Karl's interest in anyone who plays MMO's. Seriously, dude. What'cha playing?

Personally, I'm not soft-spoken at all, but I have this thing where for each sentence I've spoken, I probably thought about it twenty times before I spoke it. For each post I make, I'll read and re-write it ten times and then read over it fifteen times each time I come across it. So, if there's a reply, I'll read my end of the conversation over and over before I read the reply. Same goes for my writing and everything else. If I spot an error of any kind or something that may be "unclear," I'll have to correct it and then read it over and over again. If I screw up while I'm talking, I can never take it back so I am embarrassed for days and won't talk to the person I screwed up with (which is easy because I don't really know anyone, so no one would come hunt me down for not talking to them).

Like everyone else said, you should practice talking to people. What I used to do was plan out conversations in my head as if I was talking to someone else (which, for me, made it worse because I absolutely have to have the conversation twenty or thirty times before I'm satisfied..) but my therapist practically forced me into this group therapy where we didn't have to talk until we were comfortable. If you don't mind being in around six to eight people, being in a room with a small group of people who probably have similar issues as you makes it a little easier to talk. Of course, having a bunch of practice by talking to a therapist for a month before the actual group therapy helps too.

I don't think I'm quite at the level where I can comfortably talk to "normal" people, but I'm getting there. You'll get there too.

Edit: I'm re-reading this now.

 

[PurpleDays]

What is a MMO?

 

[tehdreamer]

What is a MMO?

Massively Multiplayer Online game. Then there's MMORPGs which is Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Think of "World of Warcraft" or "Everquest". Those are probably the most famously known ones to those who don't play them.

From wiki:

is a multiplayer video game which is capable of supporting hundreds or thousands of players simultaneously. By necessity, they are played on the Internet, and feature at least one persistent world.

I like to play lesser known mmorpgss that are free to play (f2p). I haven't played any in a long while now, but the last one I loved to play was Grand Fantasia.

[/utter geekiness]

 

[Badjedidude]

Welcome to the site.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

@ tehdreamer: Lol, you haven't hit rock bottom until you've gotten caught up in text-based RPGs!

 

[tehdreamer]

I started with text based mmos and MUDs. *hangs head in shame* I guess I had better imagination back then.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

I'm right there with you. -shakes head- The only thing I haven't played (yet) is D&D. But I'm sure my cousin would love to pull that out of the back of his closet and engage in a full-on geekfest.

 

[Peaches]

Yay! text-based MMOs! Geek is back into fashion, did you know? (actually, that would be the first time for it)

 

[bens]

I want to play EVE, I spend ages lookin at the website but my computer isn't good enough. Do any of you play it?

 

[Knight]

EVE online is good, I have a netbook with a single core @1.6 and it ran smoothly even at medium graphics.

 

[Limlim]

Dunno how this thread turned into MMOs, but at least it's something I know about

I thought about getting into EVE, but it's so old now and the game is probably extremely top heavy.

 

[Merieth]

I can relate to you, I don't really talk to people in real life that much either.. even if I do it's just small talk.

I find it easier to talk to people online, and usually i meet some nice people in MMOs ... it's just that now, I have a crush on one of the guys I met in a game.. we talk all the time and everything and he is sooo nice to me.. i told him about how i feel and he basically says that he doesnt know how he feels, and he also mentioned that "i figured one of us would eventually develop feelings for the other since we talk so much"

i stress over it a lot and wonder if he will ever feel the same... i have only known him about a month and a half, but i cant help but think about it and hope that he feels the same. i have honestly never met someone that i have so much in common with and get along with so well... i am scared that i will mess up and do something to make him dislike me

 

[Cold Comfort]

Geez, does everyone here play some sort of MMO? Ha

"I'm soft spoken, have little control over how loudly I speak, and go through periods where my voice is little more than a whisper. So, not only is it increasingly difficult to just go talk to people, even if I were to, they wouldn't hear me."

Same here. I can't stand it.