I Hate When People Say...

[user 150037]

besides the innate loathing toward what is new or different found in every culture ... in the rural conservative culture where I live it is a great shame not to be married or at least to be known as not having sex ... also my autistic nature with very low social and material needs (lack of ambition and conformism) viewed as dumbness

That's not a very fair reason to be despised

 

[Cherubino]

That's not a very fair reason to be despised

thanks but as someone before quoted "it is what it is" ... cliches may be annoying but they are like the mathematical equations expressing the laws of nature

 

[4No1]

Advising the things that you need money and time for. And advising in a way like it's only my wish pretending me from doing it. Sure it's better to be healthy and wealthy than poor and ill.

"You just need to do exercise/go to gym/ walk 8km every day". Yesterday I was advised to take a course, just 30 hours of learning per week and 2000$. Cool.
"You just need a good diet and a specialist, eating broccoli and salmon every day". "You just need a bigger flat", "You just need to find a bf", "You need more free time". Especially I hate a word "just".
Thank you for your advice, no problems, I just borrow a time-turner from Hermione, just rob a bank and then I will just buy a house, a salmon farm and can just go to gym with a personal trainer, just become a fast runner and then I will just go to hunt for a man.

 

[ringwood]

When I was a little kid I HATED this one.

"See? God punished you" (when you hurt yourself, like banged your head or something)

Um...no. God did not punish me. YOU just took joy in my pain, you cow!


EDIT:
Yes, it was my mother who used to say this.

What a horrible thing for a mother (well, anyone - but especially a mother) to say - the very person who should be offering comfort and consolation feeds you that honeysuckle. . . Sorry you grew up hearing crap like that.

 

[Wolfbane4176]

Hello all.
Here is a thread to vent out things people may say or have said to you.
It could be general well known expressions, or something specific and personal.

I'll start.

I hate when people say "Life was not meant to be fair".

Well duh!!!
Yeah, our lives are not governed by some global fairness board who ensures that people get their just rewards.
We all know this.
But when you put in the work, do what you were told, are relatively successful, but you still don't get even a modicum of what you see others get, it is GROSSLY unfair. Make that observation, and venting about it from time to time is not whining. It is a legitimate gripe.
Yeah...I know life is not fair. And my gripe is proof that it is isn't. So don't tell me something I already know.

And now for the venting part.

For the record, yes, my gripe is that I did everything I was told by parent/teachers/nuns/priests/grandmas/aunts/uncles, worked hard, made a decent living, but did not achieve anywhere near what is considered the American dream - a wife and family. I've been ignored by females my entire life. Had to use hookers and booze when all the other guys in college were dating pretty girls. And I had to do the same in my 20s when those same guys were getting engaged. And in my 30s when they were buying houses and having kids. And in my 40s when they were buying boats and winter homes in Florida. And now in my 50s as their kids are getting married and they are retiring early, going on cruises and looking forward to grandkids. So yeah. Life is not fair. Shut your trap about it. I already know. I'm living proof.

Venting over. Time to do pushups...

So that being said, is there anything in your life that brings you some kind of pleasure. Reading, Role Playing games, etc.

I'm retired so have 24/7 hours to fill with some kind of activity.

Recently widowed, so no partner to share anything with, Just me and the family dog to keep me company.

I' a movie buff where I have a spreadsheet listing the 3,300 movies I have seen thus far in my 75 years on planet Earth.

COCVID put a stop to me going to the walk-in theater, so use streaming services these days to get my film fix.

 

[Abstamyous]

"The customer is always right".

I think we have generally evolved past this, however it still gets thrown out from time to time by a customer who most definitely is not right.

Editing to add.. I have yet to hear it anywhere I have worked personally. However, in the businesses run by more ethnic or immigrant workers, locals sure like to try to manipulate it.

 

[Unsigned]

So that being said, is there anything in your life that brings you some kind of pleasure. Reading, Role Playing games, etc.

Taking long walks outside in parks where I live.
Looking out at the Sound.
Seeing the trees, flowers, birds.
Watching dogs running around playing.

I like the beach and swimming in the ocean too, but I haven't been for a few years.
I loved fishing when I was younger, but haven't done that in at least 15 years.
Surfcasting in the summer was my favorite.

 

[Unsigned]

"The only thing that is constant is change"

- Managers at work love saying that one. Sure...when something changes, they get an extra $100K on their bonus. The rest of us get a kick in the teeth. I hate change...

 

[TheSkaFish]

"Lower your expectations".

I f*cking hate that sh*t.
To me, it's a polite euphemism for, "you probably won't ever be able to do it because you weren't born with the right genetics to have enough capacity to improve, all you'll ever be able to do at it is just d*ck around pretending to do/be it and not actually doing/being it, so you might as well just give up and resign yourself to a life of staring at screens and drinking and making empty boring ass idle small talk about what the greats can do."

I got so bored of that, so long ago. I have almost zero tolerance for fan conversations anymore, I'm like "dude I don't care". I f*cking hate mediocrity. It's a prison.

 

[isthatso]

"It'll all work out in the end" because death is obviously the solver of everything,

Good one.

 

[isthatso]

"it is what it is" to me is a nebulous meaningless, unnecessary statement.

 

[isthatso]

"don't get me wrong" has become a real cliche. People need to add a disclaimer to convince others they are very open minded.

 

[isthatso]

Love yourself" ... I'm so tired of myself but I agree to not hate myself

Exactly and
" don't be so hard on yourself".
I sometimes think what they should really say is " don't be so hard on yourself. Otherwise I have no room to criticise you myself"

 

[isthatso]

When I was a little kid I HATED this one.

"See? God punished you" (when you hurt yourself, like banged your head or something)

Um...no. God did not punish me. YOU just took joy in my pain, you cow!


EDIT:
Yes, it was my mother who used to say this.

Anyone who said that is mentally deranged. Sorry it was your mother. And it would screw you up for sure. Hope you've moved on from that idiotic advice.

 

[isthatso]

I used to have a therapist tell me “there is always someone worse”. Fantastic! All my problems are solved now. I guess there must be only person on the planet requiring therapy. I’d hate to be them.

That's criminal for a therapist to say that. .
I sometimes say this to myself.

 

[okidoke]

"Be true to yourself" or "Just be yourself"

Well, frankly, I don't even know what IS my true self. And when there are things that I'd think I'd like to be doing, I know I'd be ostracised more than I am now. When people say those things, it really comes with the caveat, "As long as it fits in what I accept".

 

[isthatso]

"Be true to yourself" or "Just be yourself"

Well, frankly, I don't even know what IS my true self. And when there are things that I'd think I'd like to be doing, I know I'd be ostracised more than I am now. When people say those things, it really comes with the caveat, "As long as it fits in what I accept".

"Be the self that pleases me."

 

[reynard_muldrake]

"The customer is always right".

I think we have generally evolved past this, however it still gets thrown out from time to time by a customer who most definitely is not right.

Editing to add.. I have yet to hear it anywhere I have worked personally. However, in the businesses run by more ethnic or immigrant workers, locals sure like to try to manipulate it.

I believe the original phrase was "The customer is always right in matters of taste". Basically, the customer knows what works for them or what doesn't. Now, unfortunately, people have misinterpreted the quote to excuse bad behavior toward retail employees.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I was thinking the other day about what it is exactly that's always bothered me so much about "life's not fair", that's always pissed me off.

I thought, well, what does that mean? What does it mean when something "isn't fair"?

It means that it's unjust. It's immoral, or at least has nothing to do with morality.

When I think about the kinds of people, and things, that have pissed me off over the course of my life, I noticed there's a pattern - I've always gotten the most pissed off, at insensitivity and insensitive people, and various forms of injustice/immorality - and usually these things go hand in hand, where insensitive people also tend to be immoral and favor injustice, because it favors them. I felt like I was taught at home, in school, and by society at large to value morality, and I also value it instinctively. I always thought that basing the rules of life on morality rather than the dumb luck of what you were born with, is what it meant to be civilized, and every time we moved society more towards morality and away from survival of the fittest, quality of life got better.

It also explains my dislike for things like popularity, and hierarchies in general - they're not based on right and wrong, good and bad - they're based on the dumb luck of what you're born with, survival of the fittest. They're inherently unjust, and to me, that makes them evil. And by extension, the people that value hierarchies, also seem evil to me.

Like I said I was raised to value morality, and to think of morality as the highest value. So when it turns out that so much of life does NOT operate on morality, but sometimes acts against it in favor of survival of the fittest - which I consider shallow/superficial/immature at best, and unjust and evil at worst - it confuses and angers me.

And this is especially true of things like the social hierarchy and attraction - my natural tendency is to think of things in terms of morality, of good and bad, but that's not how these things operate. They operate based on strength and weakness, on "might makes right". There's nothing just or moral about them. It's so different, and offensive, to the way I think. So I think that explains at least part of my difficulty understanding them. I'm just not aligned with that, in fact, a lot of times I'm aligned against how it works.

 

[Trevor]

"It's Only A Game."

Is that right? Trying playing Cuphead and then say that to me.