Here's a thought for ya boys

[Drake]

can't sleep again up thinking about what I always think about...women. so I get to looking through posts, and I've come to the realization that the majority of guys on hear are the same. we're caring, willing to listen, just want to be loved and return that love, want to make a girl feel specieal...right? bottom line, we're nice guys, most of you more so than me. well what's that saying? nice guys finish last lol. why are so many good guys sitting on a forum begging for love and affection from women? because we're too nice, that's my opinion. look at all the ******** out there with gorgeous girl friends who get treated like honeysuckle then come cry to people like us...you cant tell me you dont know what I'm talking about, I'm sure you see it everywhere just like I do. it's because they dont think of us as anything but a friend, cause again..we're TOO nice. am I going to change? no lol, I'm a softy, and it makes me feel good about myself to act that way but it's obviously not working for a lot of us now is it? well I realized this kinda sounded, stupid, and like rambling, but I'm going to post it anyway cause I dont really care right now. hopefully this thread will get some good responses and get you thinking about how you're living, you can turn into an ******* and have all the women you want

 

[Qui]

I have a friend who was that nice guy that i could always talk to.
He always liked me and I wasn't intersted. It was like that for, oh, 2 years.
Now, I haven't seen him all summer but i can't stop thinking about him.
Irony of ironies, I really don't think he feels the same about me anymore.
Anyway, I've said it a million times but I'm a bad girlfriend. I'm distant and cold. He deserves better than me anyway.
But it makes me sick to see his various girlfriends over the last few years just walk all over him. Even when I just saw him as a friend, but now it's even worse. i know I'd be better than that. But he just deserves better than me.
You know Drake, it is stupid how all the ass holes get the girls. It happens that way with bitches getting the nice guy too. I hate it. Why don't mean people go together and leave the nice ones alone? I guess they all just want to run their own show. Or something. Ah, idk. Life's a *****.

 

[Robin]

Hmm, well there might be some truth in that. I've heard and read alot about that women choose the dangerous guys for flirts and the soft one's when they finally want to settle, which can take a while. Either that's the most logical reason, or we softies simply are too chicken to ask them out. You know, we could go on and on about how insane it is that both the women and men of this community could ever be lonely, considering how great and beautiful everyone seem to be here. Are we all too "soft"? Maybe our self-esteem is the sole reason? Good lord, i could probably spend a whole day thinking about this.

You're a good guy Drake, so don't go around thinking about how too much of this and that You are to ever keep a woman. There's alot more than the size of Your heart which matters in this after all. There must be...

 

[Bluey]

I agree with Robin here in that I think the guys that are generally not nice ppl also are the ppl that don't give a flying **** about what ppl think about them. so if they approach a girl and ask and she says no they just simpler say your loss am going to now ask your friend out. They don't care about being rejected so there for ask a lot moor girls and there for improve there chances dramatically.

I do think most nice ppl also care about what other ppl think of them. so there for are to "chicken" to ask.

If you get less chicken and stay nice I think you would not only get a women you well be able to keep a women which is something the ass hols of the world always fail to do in the end. Dose not matter how good of an actor you are, ppl well always see fro you in the end.

Stay nice but be less chicken and you well have it made

 

[Porman]

confidence pays a huge part too. you can be a nice, caring person yet have the confidence of an arsehole, so to speak.

The arseholes can get the girls easier, but they cant keep them. where as the nicer people find it harder at first, but when they do, and find someone else that is nice, they are set.

 

[SunWeb]

Well its very simple and all of you have the point. I am just gonna sum all of it.
Girls like bad asses more than softy that is logical. They think that the man had to be strong and confident. Well and the most softy guys aren't like that. Girls go crazy =) But than after they play so much most of them want to calm down. There for they married the guys like us. But girls like this can be cheaty though it is another theme and there a lot to say.

 

[keeper]

hopefully this thread will get some good responses and get you thinking about how you're living, you can turn into an ******* and have all the women you want

Drake, I wish it was so easy. I have acted many times like an ******* but I got no result. But maybe in my case there are other reasons why I didn't get a woman.

 

[Blue]

I'm a college student and I live with the "tough" guys in a condo. After living with them for almost 2 years, I...have experienced first hand, on how they think and what their attitude is like. All of them have girlfriends, or at least have had one before. I wouldn't call them ********, but I question their loyalty. Girls do like them in college and they are really popular, but the girls can't see their true image. I wonder, what are they really looking for in a relationship? ( ^ .^)?

 

[keeper]

I wonder, what are they really looking for in a relationship? ( ^ .^)?

They are just avoiding to be called losers, I guess. If you aren't in a relationship, you're a loser. So they keep following the mainstream. It's not important if you are loyal.

 

[Gem]

Well i can honestly say we do like good guys and of course their the ones we wish we could find but never seem to be able to.What porman said about confidence is really true though,if a man acts confident its attractive cause i guess we think it means they can look after us if something happened,but that doesnt also mean you have to treat us badly or be a player ,their the things we dont want lol i reckon the main reason sweet guys are often seen as just a friend is cause they never show any interest,their too nice to flirt or come on to you,so after a while we presume you dont like us that way

 

[ClosetGeek]

Oh gosh Drake I did not expect you to take that route.

I don't think good guys finish last.
Here is what I believe.

[i]Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.[/[/i]code]

More on the so called nice but actually not nice guys...

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml]Nice guys[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/predicate.shtml]Women don't want nice guys but kind guys[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/nice2.shtml]Nice guys we can do without[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/yagtong.shtml]nice guy on a soapbox[/url]

P.S. If a guy turns into a jerk to s***-test me or to manipulate me, I am gone like the wind.

 

[Outlawstarl337]

it's all about confidence. poeple that call them selfs nice oftin dont want to afend any one and the only way to do that is basicly to let people ride you and to stay quiet. if you say somthing it will affend people and if you make people walk on their own two feet they get angry at you for not caring thier weight. and as for what i've seen people dont want to go out with the guy that doesnt have a back bone and wont defend him self.

 

[Leef `c]

alpha males.

 

[bookbinder]

Oh gosh Drake I did not expect you to take that route.

I don't think good guys finish last.
Here is what I believe.

[i]Unfortunately, many of the guys who DO have trouble, insist on laying blame and asserting that women don't want them because they are too "Nice". These people who call themselves "Nice Guys" can't see that THEIR OWN behavior is the problem. Whether it is targetting women who are troubled to begin with, or acting in a manipulative, patronizing or obsequious fashion, these guys sabotage themselves and blame others for their misfortunes.[/[/i]code]

More on the so called nice but actually not nice guys...

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml]Nice guys[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/predicate.shtml]Women don't want nice guys but kind guys[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/nice2.shtml]Nice guys we can do without[/url]

[url=http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/yagtong.shtml]nice guy on a soapbox[/url]

P.S. If a guy turns into a jerk to s***-test me or to manipulate me, I am gone like the wind.
[/quote]

applause.

 

[SighX99]

you know, ive always hated the idea of "nice guy". and Closetgeeks articles confirmed my opinion about nice guys.

whenever someone calls himself "nice guy" usually NICE means certain flaws that makes them harder to get girls. sometimes they dont know and sometimes the "nice guy" knows the flaw, and uses the excuse of "being a nice guy" to cover up the flaws.

i dont like the term "nice guy" but i must admit, sometimes i feel like i AM a nice guy, when I fail to initiate the first move (usually due to shyness or influence of drugs = FLAWS) , and ended up not getting any.

I'm better off knowing my flaws and try to correct them instead of blaming it on other "JERKS" and call myself "a nice guy".

im not nice, i kill people in video games.

 

[Drake]

boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo @ CG I didn't say I dont have flaws, but the fact of the matter is, I treat my women like queens, how the fresia is that a flaw? I guess the fact that I'm insecure, emotional, clingry and just all around a pussy with women doesn't help though

 

[Drake]

from this...figured I'd pick out which ones are me lol

"Nice guys who expect that their girlfriend is going to be their Best Friend, then their Lover, when they themselves can't even find a way to have any male best friends. Talk about suffocation! No thanks"

"Nice guys who make friends with us and then think we owe them something more than friendship."

^^have done that in the past but recently have learned that helping people with expecting nothing in return is truly being caring

"Nice guys who, upon getting a girlfriend, feel they "don't really deserve her". This is insulting. If you don't think you are worth something special, then what you are telling her is that SHE picked a loser."

^^^acted that way in my last relationship...have always tried to change it, but I still have some insecurities.

"Nice guys who put women on pedestals. By worshipping her, you objectify and demean her."

I dont understand that..if I treat her right that doesn't mean I worship her or anything lol.

"Nice guys who are too STUPID to figure out any other way out of their so-called predicament except to conclude that they have to become woman-battering heavy drinkers and sports players."

lol...my thread just got owned

"Nice guys who sit there passively waiting for life to happen to them, instead of actively pursing their goals and dreams."

been acting like this a lot recently too, although have tried to pursue a relationship just recently!!

 

[pkg_inc]

Overlooking the flaw or no flaw issue, I think it's fair to say that nice guys do finish last. I don't think "nice" is a top priority quality among young people. If I'd had to speak on a general basis, I'd say youths/young adults take less pride in qualities our parents valued when thinking about relationships. You know, we're supposed to be on equal footing, the father staying more at home with the newborn baby, the mother pursuing her career and so on. But since that leads to wishy-washy gender specific roles (like when men were to work and women were to take care of the home), the new generation of "soft" men are caught between the two, stuck so to speak. I think this old pattern stills lingers on people's minds unconsciously. I'm not saying all soft men are screwed, but I think it's easier for your average alpha male to score.

Now, as for the flaw issue. I agree with the quotes in Drake's last post. It is wrong to solely rely on a girlfriend for all social needs or look down on yourself and all that. However. We're all human, and we all got flaws. If you were to scrutinize everyone, you'd come up with sh*tloads of negative qualities. And with that in mind, low self esteem/confidence as the main trait isn't the worst way to go, by far. It just isn't all that attractive.

As for you personally Drake, you have probably heard this before, but don't go change yourself for the sake of others. If you're having trouble coping with yourself as you are, wouldn't if be even harder coping as someone you're not? As I stated at the top, nice guys finish last, but they do finish

 

[Rebel001]

If I'd had to speak on a general basis, I'd say youths/young adults take less pride in qualities our parents valued when thinking about relationships.

Well I did read somewhere that when we are looking for someone to be in a relationship with in, we end up indrectly and without realizing it, picking the worst attributes of both our parents. Usually in general we end up looking for someone that resembles our parents in one way or another. For guys they pick someone somewhat similar to our mother, and for girls we pick someone that resembles our father just a little.

I can relate to that because when i have been in a relationship with someone, there are usually one or more characteristics that relate to my father in a way, good or bad..but..usually bad.

this is a totally random fact of useless information that i decided to present

I dont know if thats whats pkg_inc meant..if it wasnt...sorry

 

[pkg_inc]

If I'd had to speak on a general basis, I'd say youths/young adults take less pride in qualities our parents valued when thinking about relationships.

Well I did read somewhere that when we are looking for someone to be in a relationship with in, we end up indrectly and without realizing it, picking the worst attributes of both our parents. Usually in general we end up looking for someone that resembles our parents in one way or another. For guys they pick someone somewhat similar to our mother, and for girls we pick someone that resembles our father just a little.

I can relate to that because when i have been in a relationship with someone, there are usually one or more characteristics that relate to my father in a way, good or bad..but..usually bad.

this is a totally random fact of useless information that i decided to present

I dont know if thats whats pkg_inc meant..if it wasnt...sorry

Hehe, that wasn't really what I was thinking of, but I'm hearing what you're saying. I think many boys/men want someone who will accept them (like a mother) and love them unconditonally (like a mother) (hopefully someone who's a bit sexier though, sorry all you moms out there). If you're a 'nice guy', then maybe you are looking for someone who is resembling this mother figure more than your average macho football team captain? It would explain a bit why some of those girls on the site someone posted earlier were so mad; (freely interpreted of course) "I don't want to be (like) your mother!"