brickinthewall
Well-known member
Hey everyone , I'm new here just signed up a few days and I have to say I'm really happy I found this forum.
My name is Michael I'm from a little country called Romania and yes I'm pretty much a lonely person. I found this forum while searching up general causes of loneliness on google ( I guess that's how most people find it) and while I read through a few threads I had a feeling of being "home" and among people that will understand me so I signed up.
A little more about me : I will be 20 years old pretty soon and a very big part of my life is music (don't know where I would be without it). I play a few instruments , my best being guitar , though I don't consider myself a musician because I don't think I'm all that good (I also post on youtube so if anyone is interested let me know). I spend a lot of time online since this seems to be the only place where I can truly connect with people and the rest of my time struggling to get into med school.
About how I ended up being the way I am , it's a pretty boring and probably common story around here but I'll write a few sentences about because I never really told anyone.
I never really was a social person but my real problems started when I was 14 and I had a huge crush on my best friend which in time grew into something more. I didn't tell her for a long time but I eventually got myself together and let her know. This was followed up by me falling into the place called "friend zone" and I just have to say that the following years were the worst years of my life so far. Having to see her with others tore me apart. I kept telling myself every day that it's just a crush , it will go away in a few weeks , if not a few months but it will. This went on til the day we both graduated high school and I was pretty sure this is where it stops but to my surprise it didn't. It will be 6 years now soon and nothing about the way I feel towards her has changed despite the fact that at the moment I haven't seen her for over half a year.
Emotionally speaking I have progressed a lot in these years and have learned to live with myself but it has caused me serious social issues that I will have a really hard time getting over (although I'm not even sure I want to).
I have never been in a relationship because I have only ever loved this one person enough to even try and I'm not even sure if I want a relationship at the moment because while I know I will never have her and I know this sounds seriously crazy , I want to stay loyal to her until the day all of my feelings for her are gone.
Sorry for writing such a long post but I'm not usually a person to talk about my feelings and about myself in general and I thought it could be helpful to talk about it with people that have similar situations to mine.
It's good to be here and thanks to everyone. Also sorry if some things I say don't make sense but english isn't my native language so I sometimes mess up sentences.
My name is Michael I'm from a little country called Romania and yes I'm pretty much a lonely person. I found this forum while searching up general causes of loneliness on google ( I guess that's how most people find it) and while I read through a few threads I had a feeling of being "home" and among people that will understand me so I signed up.
A little more about me : I will be 20 years old pretty soon and a very big part of my life is music (don't know where I would be without it). I play a few instruments , my best being guitar , though I don't consider myself a musician because I don't think I'm all that good (I also post on youtube so if anyone is interested let me know). I spend a lot of time online since this seems to be the only place where I can truly connect with people and the rest of my time struggling to get into med school.
About how I ended up being the way I am , it's a pretty boring and probably common story around here but I'll write a few sentences about because I never really told anyone.
I never really was a social person but my real problems started when I was 14 and I had a huge crush on my best friend which in time grew into something more. I didn't tell her for a long time but I eventually got myself together and let her know. This was followed up by me falling into the place called "friend zone" and I just have to say that the following years were the worst years of my life so far. Having to see her with others tore me apart. I kept telling myself every day that it's just a crush , it will go away in a few weeks , if not a few months but it will. This went on til the day we both graduated high school and I was pretty sure this is where it stops but to my surprise it didn't. It will be 6 years now soon and nothing about the way I feel towards her has changed despite the fact that at the moment I haven't seen her for over half a year.
Emotionally speaking I have progressed a lot in these years and have learned to live with myself but it has caused me serious social issues that I will have a really hard time getting over (although I'm not even sure I want to).
I have never been in a relationship because I have only ever loved this one person enough to even try and I'm not even sure if I want a relationship at the moment because while I know I will never have her and I know this sounds seriously crazy , I want to stay loyal to her until the day all of my feelings for her are gone.
Sorry for writing such a long post but I'm not usually a person to talk about my feelings and about myself in general and I thought it could be helpful to talk about it with people that have similar situations to mine.
It's good to be here and thanks to everyone. Also sorry if some things I say don't make sense but english isn't my native language so I sometimes mess up sentences.
