I am not lonely

[kasim]

Hi!

You know I`m not lonely at all. Came here to read about why people feel lonely. Is it the lack of friends, bad love experience or something else? Your opinion is welcome.

I have read some stories about bad love experience. I was with a girl for 3 years. I thought that we will marry after a year. Now we are not together for approximately 3 months or more. And I don't think of her at all.

I don't think how it is bad to be without her and how nice it would be to bring things back. I simply don't see how these thoughts will help me. And they won't. If only make my life worse. But do I want to feel myself worse? I answered this question as: No! What for?

All I think about is what good time we had together. What a great experience it was for me. After this relationship I'm completely a different person. Now I know more and will not make the mistakes I made. Isn't it great to be better than you were? It is indeed.

I don't have a girlfriend now. And nothing tells me that there won't be another. So why to worry? There are so many things to do in your life. Like accomplishing your goals and making your life better and better.

When the time comes and I will truly feel the need to meet someone I will meet her. Will our relationship last long or not? If you never try, you will never know the answer. And it's hundred times worth trying again and again.

In simple words I mean be positive, think positive and never stop to enjoy your life.

P.S Contrary to the cats we have only one life. So there is no time to worry about problems, which are actually not problems, if you decide them not to be so. Everything is in your own hands!

P.P.S Your opinion is more than welcome. And sorry for my English. It's not my native language.

 

[Punisher]

Hello Kasim

 

[EveWasFramed]

Hi, Kasim, welcome to the forum.

 

[lingo]

wow. That's pretty unusual intro.

Anyway, welcome. Nice to see you here.

 

[DayvanCowboy]

Its good to hear you haven't met some of the types of people like I have. People who are just full of lies and are a total embarassment to the world. Maybe it will continue on that way for you. If it does, well, more power to you then.

Welcome to A.L.L.

 

[Nyktimos]

Welcome Kasim. It's not the usual type of intro we see. I could give reasons why I feel lonely, but I sort of know that I have always felt that way no matter what my circumstances.

I think everyone here is different, though. Welcome again.

 

[Bluey]

Firstly I already hate you. You make everything sound so easy.

I wonder if your EX thinks in the same way. I hope she is not pining over you.

Well I don't really hate you, moor admire you. I could not hate anyone. Hate is such a strong word I think.

Your english is fine. I do not see a problem with it at all.

Welcome here

Hi!

You know I`m not lonely at all. Came here to read about why people feel lonely. Is it the lack of friends, bad love experience or something else? Your opinion is welcome.

I have read some stories about bad love experience. I was with a girl for 3 years. I thought that we will marry after a year. Now we are not together for approximately 3 months or more. And I don't think of her at all.

I don't think how it is bad to be without her and how nice it would be to bring things back. I simply don't see how these thoughts will help me. And they won't. If only make my life worse. But do I want to feel myself worse? I answered this question as: No! What for?

All I think about is what good time we had together. What a great experience it was for me. After this relationship I'm completely a different person. Now I know more and will not make the mistakes I made. Isn't it great to be better than you were? It is indeed.

I don't have a girlfriend now. And nothing tells me that there won't be another. So why to worry? There are so many things to do in your life. Like accomplishing your goals and making your life better and better.

When the time comes and I will truly feel the need to meet someone I will meet her. Will our relationship last long or not? If you never try, you will never know the answer. And it's hundred times worth trying again and again.

In simple words I mean be positive, think positive and never stop to enjoy your life.

P.S Contrary to the cats we have only one life. So there is no time to worry about problems, which are actually not problems, if you decide them not to be so. Everything is in your own hands!

P.P.S Your opinion is more than welcome. And sorry for my English. It's not my native language.

 

[Gerardo]

Hello Kasim. I understand your point, and I try to stay positive as well, although I can't keep it up for more than a couple of days. I do admit that part of my feelings have to stem due to my actions and reactions, but I still feel this way.

Welcome and I hope you keep accomplishing your dreams!

 

[Luisa]

Hello! i'm Lou welcome to the forum

 

[SophiaGrace]

wow what an unusual intro!

You will be a good addition to our forum! n_n

I hope you stay a while

You seem wise...

 

[Brian]

Well Kasim, it is one matter to have those things from time to time, and not miss them when you are without. But some of us have the problem of having never known love, affection, or intimacy, even in to our 20s and 30s. I am 21 and the closest I've come to having a girlfriend was a 3 week fling with a really immature girl, last year. There was no relationship, basically, we just had sex a couple of times. But that's the only time I've -ever- been with a girl in any way, Kasim. Before then I had never even kissed a girl. I've still never known real love face to face, or genuine affection.

But I'm even considered lucky compared to some here, who are older than I and have never been on a date. I was there for quite some time, and I suspect I've rejoined the ranks.


What you have to realize Kasim is that so many of us are seemingly incapable of even getting someone to like us. It's one thing to be in your position, -able- to get a girlfriend from time to time. Our problem (for a lot of us) is that for whatever reason, we can't. At all.

 

[kasim]

Its good to hear you haven't met some of the types of people like I have. People who are just full of lies and are a total embarassment to the world. Maybe it will continue on that way for you. If it does, well, more power to you then.

Welcome to A.L.L.

Hi DayvanCowboy!

You know i meet that type of people you stated everyday. On work, on the street or among my friends. I believe people don't differ so much all around the world.

But If I don't share their feelings and thoughts I don't care. Because only I decide how I want to feel and to think. Not they. Their absolutes are not mine. I believe while you stick to your own absolutes and trust your own judgment you are better than they.

They won't understand you. But who cares about it when you believe yourself and live up to your beliefs and judgment.

And it is only a matter of time till you find people who will appreciate you for not what others think of you but for who you are.

Of course some will think it's too idealistic. But it is my opinion and the way I feel.

 

[kasim]

Welcome Kasim. It's not the usual type of intro we see. I could give reasons why I feel lonely, but I sort of know that I have always felt that way no matter what my circumstances.

I think everyone here is different, though. Welcome again.

Hi Nyktimos!

What I understood is that you feel lonely all the time and have your own reasons for it. That circumstances doesn't matter.

If it is right, what would you feel by simply changing the way you feel to the opposite? If the circumstances doesn't matter I believe it is can be accomplished with little effort.

E.g When I wake up in the morning I can tell myself : "Ooh ****, it's morning already. I feel so bad, I want to sleep for more 2 hours.I don't want to go to work..." Of course I will be unhappy and this will be written on my forehead.

Or

I wake up in the morning and say: "Ooh ****, what a beautiful morning! So many challenges awaiting me. But I will do my best and will accomplish everything. And in the end of the day I will celebrate my achievement." How much pleasure it gives . When before retiring I know that I have done my best and completed all the tasks i wanted to be done. As a result I feel happy and have a peaceful sleep.

In the two examples the circumstances are the same.

I stick to the second example. And my mornings are a happy time. And the time before retiring is the best. Because I feel terrific!

P.S And only a year ago my mornings were as in the first example. And my days and the feelings appropriate. And when I changed my thinking I changed everything. I feel happy by living so.

 

[kasim]

Firstly I already hate you. You make everything sound so easy.

I wonder if your EX thinks in the same way. I hope she is not pining over you.

Well I don't really hate you, moor admire you. I could not hate anyone. Hate is such a strong word I think.

Your english is fine. I do not see a problem with it at all.

Welcome here

Firstly I don't wonder at all what my EX thinks of me or what she feels. The result is that we are not together. And I don't want to live all my life regretting the past. Only present and the past matters.

However it was good time and experience. I will keep that best with me. Not the worst.

Secondly I've never understood why people make simple things so complicated. If there is a hidden joy in it, I simply don't see it.

P.S We have the opportunity to choose. That's what makes us human.

 

[kasim]

Hello Kasim. I understand your point, and I try to stay positive as well, although I can't keep it up for more than a couple of days. I do admit that part of my feelings have to stem due to my actions and reactions, but I still feel this way.

Welcome and I hope you keep accomplishing your dreams!

Hi Gerardo!

Thanks for wishing me to accomplish my dreams. I know that I will.

Being positive is one of the best things in humans. Being positive for a couple of days is better than being negative all the time. Why not to try extending this period by training. The same way we train our muscles in the gym.

Kill all negative thoughts in your head for three days. Than be negative for one day. Just push yourself to do it. Then repeat and with time make it 4 days positive 1 negative.

After time it will be hard to be negative. As why to be so if you can be positive.

You can call me crazy, i don't mind

 

[kasim]

Well Kasim, it is one matter to have those things from time to time, and not miss them when you are without. But some of us have the problem of having never known love, affection, or intimacy, even in to our 20s and 30s. I am 21 and the closest I've come to having a girlfriend was a 3 week fling with a really immature girl, last year. There was no relationship, basically, we just had sex a couple of times. But that's the only time I've -ever- been with a girl in any way, Kasim. Before then I had never even kissed a girl. I've still never known real love face to face, or genuine affection.

But I'm even considered lucky compared to some here, who are older than I and have never been on a date. I was there for quite some time, and I suspect I've rejoined the ranks.

What you have to realize Kasim is that so many of us are seemingly incapable of even getting someone to like us. It's one thing to be in your position, -able- to get a girlfriend from time to time. Our problem (for a lot of us) is that for whatever reason, we can't. At all.

Hi Brian!

I'm also 21. And I've never known real love face to face, or genuine affection. I still don't know what true love or genuine affection is. I thought i knew but now i don't. Someday I will find my own answer to this question.

As to the kiss, i just remembered my first. It was hard to invite her to take the walk with me. In the end of the walk in was hard to decide to kiss her. Because of the unknown result. Will she answer on my kiss with her's or will she push me back. However I tried and succeeded.

You see, it was I who decided to try. Not she. If i didn't decide to take that risk, who knows what person I would be now.

You are incapable of getting someone like you? Who told you that you are incapable? The society or people around you?

Or you decided so? If you don't like yourself for what characteristics other people will like you? If you don't love yourself, why others should? If you don't respect yourself, why others should? For what?

I believe that only we decide who we want to be. And if you don't believe in yourself it's your inner problem which you must defeat. Only if you want to change your life.

P.S We are capable of much more than we think. I strongly recommend you and others to read a book by Lance Armstrong: "It's not about a bike. My journey back to life." And you will see what we human are capable of. You will feel terrific.
P.P.S The other two books which are the best i have read in my life are by Ayn Rand: The Fountainhead ; and "Atlas Shrugged" .
P.P.S The book which helped me and also can help you, only if you want to. "Grow Rich While You Sleep" by Ben Sweetland. I believe you can find answers in that book to some of your problems.

 

[kasim]

Forgot to mention.

When you invite a girl/woman to the date and she refuses nothing bad happens.

You are still alive! Or not?

 

[kasim]

Again forgot to mention

Those books you can get from amazon. The price is affordable and it's definitely worth reading them.

 

[ExtensivexLDL]

Again forgot to mention

Those books you can get from amazon. The price is affordable and it's definitely worth reading them.

Dude, this is not a place for conspicuous adverstising. I don't care how helpful you think it is.

Also, just wondering, if your life is as good as it seems to be (judging from your posts), why did you join?

Don't forget, people may have deeper problems here than you might think.

 

[Minus]

It would appear that kasim joined out of the belief that he could help people here, though i can not speak for him. I would agree that in many cases what is needed goes much deeper then an attitude adjustment. What he says is worth saying for those that it may help, though i also do not believe that includes everyone.