I don't want to play games anymore

[ClosetGeek]

Many years back I used to be very simple and honest in my relationships. As years went by, I noticed that men do not like nice women. I am not saying they like nasty women either. They just don't like women who are foreseeable.

In the meantime, I dated some good men but also some really nasty players. I am not going to say that all men are liars and cheaters. I grew up in a home where men were polite, loyal and solid. I think it was solely my mistake when I trusted men I should not have trusted.

After dating the players, I myself turned into a player.
I cannot concentrate on one guy and I keep myself bored after being few times with the same guy. I know this is bad. However whenever I get the feeling that this time around I should be honest with a man I meet, he starts playing games. I don't want to get hurt, so I just pull the plug.

Sometimes I get so bored with these games, so I drop them. I mean I drop the men and stop the game.
They end up emailing and calling me for days. With no answer from my side.
Today I was thinking I can actually just continue my single happy life. I am now single and happy. I don't have to please anyone.

I stopped believing in love. I have tried to bring back that feeling when I believed in love but I don't believe in love anymore.

Although I have many male friends, on a romantic level, I don't wanna have nothing to do with men anymore. They can come over for some raunchy sex but besides that I am not interested in anything else anymore.

 

[RobertJW]

Well at least you're not lonely, not from the sound of it anyway

 

[samba101]

I guess that's just life and it really depends what you want from it. The good thing is you've decided where you want to be at the moment. I was in a 10 year relationship so I don't really know what's out there when it comes to men.

 

[ClosetGeek]

Well at least you're not lonely, not from the sound of it anyway

Well you can still feel lonely in the midst of many people, right? I only feel lonely right before I go to bed.

 

[Bluey]

You can feel lonely when you have a lot off ppl that wont or you are jumping into bed with. And this I would say is prof that having someone to have regular sex with dose not make you feel any less lonely. You need to fined a connection on some sort of deeper level with someone. whether that be with a friend or a lover. I do think there is a difference in having someone there to get sexual relies out off and finding someone that witch you can have a good time with out side the bedroom.

I am glad to see that you know that all men are not jerks. You had a few brothers then? Well I can understand why some women think of all men as scum. After seeing the way some of my friends treat there GF/wife act and how they never stay faithfull really makes me understand why some women would think that. All tho its proven statistically that women are moor likely to two time there man then there man is to do it to them. This is something I could not forgive. Don't matter how much I was hurting I could not go back with someone after they did that to me. But even if every man you meet is doing this and playing games you still have to keep trying for the right one. It only takes one you know. You do right to keep dropping them. But you got to keep looking for Mr right and keep giving the next guy a clean record in tell he proves hes a jerk as well. Know what I mean? But I really got where you are coming from with your post. To many ppl playing games and just not saying how they really feel.

 

[RobertJW]

Well at least you're not lonely, not from the sound of it anyway

Well you can still feel lonely in the midst of many people, right?

Oh yes.

But it cant be as bad as living alone, working alone, cooking alone, shopping alone, bathing alone, sleeping alone.

Thats the crap I have to deal with

 

[ClosetGeek]

Well no having regular sex does not help anyone with their loneliness. If I am having sex with someone I am having it for the sake of having sex and nothing else.

I have no brothers. I am the only child. I grew up as a tomboy though. We had no girls in my neighbourhood so I always ended up playing with boys. Later on I became friends with boys cause female stuff did not interest me.
The reason why I think men are not jerks, is because of the men in my family. Like I said they are polite, honest and loyal.

Great, all the men who begged me to call or email received email from me two days ago and guess what I got no answer back. Wtf? You don't have sex with them, they don't call, you have sex with them, they also don't call. You don't return their calls or emails, they hunt you down like a dog, if you answer however, they don't answer back.

RobertJW, being alone is way much better than interacting with an individual who is being manipulative and playing mind games. How would you like that? Say you are talking to a girl an she says she wants to meet up on Saturday for coffee. Then after you determine when to meet she disappears on you. You still don't know where you are going to meet and she does not return your calls. Is that sick or what? (I have had a guy did that to me for the past two days, he told me he really wants to meet up with me, so we made up a time and he is been "unreachable" after that conversation. Maybe he got hit by a potato truck. Or maybe the aliens beemed him up to the mothership.)
Here is a good video about what I am talking about.

 

[RobertJW]

Maybe you're right.Maybe being alone is better than being mindfucked.

I'd have to experience both to make a proper judgement though...........

 

[ClosetGeek]

Update on the jerk that disappared on me. I called him up this morning and left him this message. "Since I didn't hear anything from you, I assume that something important came up so you can't meet up anymore. So I'll see you around, take care". I immediately got a call telling me that he does want to meet up. However I did not take his call and he talked to my answering machine. I did not return his call.
So I think I am gonna go play some squash with a work acquiantance of mine instead of meeting up with him. It will be a good workout and it will help me clear my mind.

 

[davechaos]

You know it may just be possible that you haven't met the right person because you fear the solid, the dependable...dare I say...the boring.

That describes me...I am used for debt clearance, for friendship through troubled times...I am good looking and I have a great career...all I want in life is to meet a partner for the rest of my life...someone to share everything with...the good times and the bad...it just seems when someone I am with has the bad times I am useful...but when the good times appear, or there are bad times for me, they always disappear.

When I get a text or a call I reply immediately...even when I am at work which I really shouldn't do.

There is definately one bloke I know that is not a jerk lol.

 

[ClosetGeek]

Davechaos,

I would give an arm, a leg and half of my body to meet a solid, dependable or a boring guy. I am so sick and tired of stupid games.

Thanks for continuing the tradition of being a bloke with good values and good manners.