I really need help...and I really dont know who to turn to, and I really dont have

[ghostly..theroadhome]

anyone to turn to?

I'm trying to finish a degree in 2 months.

I've got to find accomodation, and cant get any. My mom is making my life hell because she hates me doing well. I've no morale or social support.

How can I cope living alone, and being able to be strong to do this alone? It means alot, Im so scared Im not going to do well enough.

I dont know if I can pull it all together in 2 months, I'm more scared, and its more the fear thats holding me back.

I'd do anything at this stage so succeed, cos I can now see my mom doesnt care, she was willing to shout at me everyday and not care, and now that its coming closer and I still havent come close to finishing, she's getting happier and happier and is leaving me alone, 2 months before I've got to finish.

I've got to get a place soon, and I cant find one, I'm asking the college and I'm not sure if they'll allow me

I really dont know what to do, but the more my life falls apart the more my mom is happy. I've got to some how pull through and get on my feet by sept. to be also able to support myself in accomodation and money for sept as well as completing this.

I really have no one to turn to apart from my counselor, Im trying so hard to be in a better position in sept. and get my career and life together, with no support from anyone.

I really dont know who to turn to, I cry myself to sleep every night, sobbing, knowing I still havent completed at the end of the day. I really dont know how to achieve it faster, Im waiting for to hear about accomodation, cos I think that might make a difference than my mom shouting at me daily and putting me down, and generally very controlling.

I need to prove, I am able to be successful and she's not going to stop me, and I've got to survive enough to make it through to live independently with money etc. otherwise, my life will be hell.
I really dont know who to turn to and I dont have anyone to turn to.

How do you be alone, knowing there an impending life of hell if I dont pull through this time

 

[suckaG]

sounds like you are in a rough spot man.

why do you need to finish a degree in 2 months? and what are you taking? maybe you could apply form some scholarships, or a loan.

 

[ghostly..theroadhome]

The thing about it is the lecturer said, 'I wasnt suitable for the discipline'

Id rather be dead at this stage, between college and home, I just walked infront of a car a few mins ago, he screeched, but I wish it had hit me...

 

[suckaG]

huh? that lecturer sounds bogus.

it sucks that you feel like being dead,

not sure what else to say other than hold on, and try to get to a better place? school isn't everything, maybe you just need some time to settle into a better environment before getting back into it.

 

[Brian]

I need to prove, I am able to be successful and she's not going to stop me, and I've got to survive enough to make it through to live independently with money etc. otherwise, my life will be hell.
I really dont know who to turn to and I dont have anyone to turn to.

How do you be alone, knowing there an impending life of hell if I dont pull through this time

Alright pal, calm down, pull yourself together.

I think you've already got your answer, here.

I need to prove, I am able to be successful and she's not going to stop me

In times like this, ultimately the only person who can help us, is ourselves. The best advisors, the largest support network, all they can really do is cheer you on and make suggestions. Success still comes from our efforts.


You've got two months left 'til you have your degree. Obviously you can do it if you've made it this far. Prove them all wrong and show them how capable you really are. I ended up having to do the same thing after a real knock-down, drag-out with my step mom. I was through living in her messed up, reclusive fantasy land.

What's difficult about finding a place? Are there no appartments in your area? Have you looked elsewhere? Here in rural north idaho, there's houses -everywhere- for rent.

And don't worry about starting out in your career right off the bat. Most people have to take a simpler job until they find what they really want. Every bit of school and training I've done has been toward a career in fire and EMS, but hell, I'm a part-time janitor right now.


It's alright, man. You've got this. And we're here to support ya if you need encouragement.

And stop walking in front of traffic, it's bad for your health.

 

[ghostly..theroadhome]

it is everything

 

[NOAH_FX]

it is everything

Im not going to say what i've gone through... But if you have the will you can create the strength to do anything. Their are people who don't start their careers until their 30's. Whats imporant is the willpower to push yourself, believe in your self man. Cause no one else is going to. Sometimes your, your best friend, sometimes worst enemy. But either way only you are going to get yourself through honeysuckle... and when you finally realize it.. it feels so good. You look in the mirror one day and smile back, laugh a little and feel like your invincible. Because really, whats the worst they can throw at you? Exactly, you can take it.

P.S

<Probably bad advice>
Everytime your mom puts you down, laugh at her like shes a moron and walk away. People who put you down are trying to bring themselves up through your pain. So turn that around, dont pay it any attention, laugh it off, mother or not, do you really care what someone who pull's that honeysuckle thinks?
</Probably bad advice>

Goodluck man, pull through, it gets better