im a loser

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Lonesome Crow said:
You can listen to all the people in the world for advice of what to or not to do....

The things oif ot is....
We.re creatures of habits
If you have been bahitually thinking youre a loser all your life...
Un less a fairy god mother cast a spell in your sleep....you might get up feeling or think ur not a loser for a while...until the next time something gose wrong...something as minute as getting a paper cut..will set you off in negative thinking again..Then youll simply react to ur negative thoughts again. .

Change is always possible... if truly wanted.

 
Honestly, getting what you want from life is about what you're willing to sacrifice for it. I have a great deal in life and I know that I've also given up a great deal for it too; its no real different for you. What defines "winners" people who accomplish things, and people who just drift through life, I think, is how conscious those decisions and priorities are.

At any rate, you are clearly depressed and depression is on a chemical level. Most realistically, you should realize that while you might find your commentary of yourself as positive as hollow, your negative commentary is just as chemically induce. This is why exercise and serotonin can help pull you out of that level and allow you to focus on a more genuine picture - hopefully one where you can exercise your will more in.
 
I am in a similar bind to you with some differences. I am one year removed from 30, and that has had me thinking of my status in life alot lately, as a result I am miserable, I feel a failure of sorts. I face constant anxiety because I never have even come close to making enough money for an independent livelihood, so I still co-habit with my mother who gives constant threats that she will kick me out. I don't think I will ever have what it takes to make a sufficient income either, perhaps death can be my only answer to a life of anxiety over my poverty.

I know some guy in a similar situation of a similar age, except by conscious desire he never wanted to become a worker. Andrew dropped out of high school, never worked in his life, and yet it never seems to bother him. The difference between him add me, is that his parents were ex-hippies, who support him no matter what, they didn't ever pressure him to get a job or threaten to kick him out far as I know. Thus he is more congruent with his situation, right now his parents retired to another state, so he lives with a girlfriend who supports him financially. He does not seem to care much about social status in terms of earning income or such. Andrew seems one of the most anxiety free guys I have ever met.

I find that when I am most happy in life is when I don't think about my status or compare myself to others. Conversely when I most think about my status in the world, is when I am most morose. I will not say cheaps things like others have said, because honestly this honeysuckle society is organized on the Darwinian-Capitalist notion of competition, that the victors deserve to crush out the relative losers in the economic sphere. So in a way, people like us are losers according to conventional thought, so we must hide ourselves from many types of social gatherings where we will be looked down upon and much negative gossip will be directed against us since if you are not an economic success you are deemed to be ignorant or lazy. But like I said, you have to try to ignore the logic of these greedy Darwinian-capitalist creatures walking around, pretending they are human, because that is the only way you can be happy. I am sure you have already seen the truth: that when you just live life without a concern about your place compared to others is when you can be happy, but if you do the opposite you can only be miserable. In Buddhism and life there is relative and absolute truth. In the relative truth according to our social myths you are a loser, but in absolute truth, the rich greedy vaunted ******** are really the losers who will swallow the world just to cover up their inner lacking.

 
penguin said:
i hear what everybody is saying here but still, i cant lie to myself anymore. this isnt a new problem, ive felt like this for years and years now. always holding on to hope that things will get better, that things will turn around, that my day will come. i cant lie to myself anymore. i have to face the FACTS............

im never going to amount to anything. im never going to be successful in anything i try to do. happiness is for everybody else and not meant for me. these things are just the facts and the plain truths. i cant turn a blind eye to it anymore.

i dont see how people can say things like "you are doing really well" and "you are so smart". if i was doing well, i woulndt be here. if i was so smart, i woundnt be struggling in a lower level math class and other classes. i wouldnt be in community college in the first place, not to mention in my late 20's. i wouldnt be here on this website either. so how am i doing so well in life? i say quit the BS and tell it like it is.

one of you said that i will only be a loser if i quit. really? so sitting though a class the entire semester, being miserable, and ending up with a D or F grade is success? really? come on.

i hate myself and i hate "learning". this all seems like so much frustration and work for such a little pay off. oh wow, an Associates degree. big deal. an Associates degree doesnt mean much of anything. its practically worthless.

i wish i could just get it over with and make everybody happy and end my life. that way everybody can say "oh we are right, he is worthless/stupid/whatever", our lives are so great!". F off.

bro, i totally feel you coz i feel the same minus the college stuff coz im still in highschool but i still feel the same.
even the stuff about girls and honeysuckle, maybe some people are meant to be loosers? i dunno man im jst sick of life

 
I dunno if its just me... But I feel like everyone could be on the wrong track here....

money is tight... so why go to school?
Is it really the best use of your time and money?

school gives you nothing to show for it at the end. nothing but a piece of paper.
honestly... theres no guarantees.

everyone has a different way of thinking, school restricts it all and makes you think the same.
OK If you need to learn algebra to better understand key concepts of a career that you are interested in. then yeah... learn it. and be excited about it. cuz you are becoming the person you decided to become. and thats honourable.

I could be the only one off the tracks tho... so i apologize if I'm not getting it.
 
I may be closer to the field than you are, but I am not much better off. The only thing I keep up with is the career. Otherwise I have nothing else. Hell I do not even have a relationship of convenience. All I have is my job and my website.

I was just born a lower. I always have been. Since the day my mom started socializing me as a child. So you are not alone. I have learned to embrace destiny. Once my cat dies, I will be selected out.
 
penguin said:
im stuck sitting on the sidelines of life, watching everybody else get to have all the fun.

How could you look at it this way? You know that life isn't easy for anyone. Ironically, people with high jobs and salaries can be sadder than you.
Don't beat yourself anymore, that's the last thing you need in this situation. You need to clear the fog of this depression and negative look toward everything. You yourself can be the guy laughing and giving love to everyone, or instead you can be one who doesn't talk or look at people eyes.
C'mon man, why're you looking down at life that bad?

All I'm trying to say is that a lot of the problems come from the feelings we have, and then we start blaming life with those negative feelings, too.
It's a cycle you have to snap out and break it.

I swear that's the first step. Talk with you gf to vend, and let her share what she has in her heart. You two should carry each other instead fights.

I have nothing but a good wish for you penguin
 

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