I'm always mostly alone

[AFrozenSoul]

@WallflowerGirl83: Ah ****, well it would have been nice if you did not have to go outside. Well regardless I know exactly how you feel. I just assume people hate me instinctively. This is what keeps me alone even when I try to change. So I have just given up.

I try and look at the bright side sometimes. Like if I want to play SWTOR all day I am not neglecting anyone. Or if I want to sleep all day no one suffers but me. Or if I want to go out I do not have to worry about anyone but myself.

I am not the best person to advise you on this stuff though.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Yeah I understand, trust me your not alone. Thank you for replying to my post though, not many people even do that. So even just by hearing your thoughts makes me feel better.

Cause I know I'm not alone in this.

 

[AfterDark]

Hmm.. aren't they still your friends, even if they don't call? Can reconnect with them I guess.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Yeah I understand, trust me your not alone. Thank you for replying to my post though, not many people even do that. So even just by hearing your thoughts makes me feel better.

Cause I know I'm not alone in this.

Trust me I look on the other bright side more. That side is that when I kill myself people will just scratch their heads and then throw my body in a dumpster.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Yeah I understand, trust me your not alone. Thank you for replying to my post though, not many people even do that. So even just by hearing your thoughts makes me feel better.

Cause I know I'm not alone in this.

Trust me I look on the other bright side more. That side is that when I kill myself people will just scratch their heads and then throw my body in a dumpster.

Oh man. That sucks how you feel like that. I'm here if you ever want to talk, but it's up to you. Cause I know how hard it is to trust people.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

@WallflowerGirl83: I thought I said it is a bright side not a sad thing. It is not that I don't trust people online. It is more I have been telling the same old story for years. Talking about it doesn't really help. Though it is a fun game to see how quickly I can disgust whomever I am talking too.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Oh I'm sorry, I misinterperted you. My bad lol. Well whatever is cool with you. I'm pretty open, not many things disgust me, except for spiders. Those things frighten me, I get nightmares of spiders crawling all over my bed. :shivers:

 

[ShybutHi]

My whole life I grew up having friends, but as I got a lot older, I grew distant and didn't like talking to people. It kinda scared me going out in public and seeing someone I know. Most of the time now, I spend at home, watching movies, reading and writing, playing video games, swimming and trying to entertain myself cause it's so hard for me to trust someone. Who do I know if they have good intentions or not. So many people took advantage of my kindness and once I realized there not even my friends it made me depressed. Overtime I grew more distant, got severly depressed. And now I'm starting to feel comfortable being alone, but at the same time all I really want is just a true friend I can count on and who will understand me. Not to top it off, but when I do make friends, over time they stop calling me. Maybe my shyness and weirdness makes them uncomfortalbe... I have no idea. Hope there's someone who understands what I mean by this post. I know I rambled on there but my mind is racing so fast.

The same thing happened to me when it comes to friends and just into my teen years around 16 I started to become very reserved and started to become very socially anxious. I would get anxious when going out no matter what it was, sometimes got panic attacks and would always try and dodge the social situations. I have always been the shy timid type anyway but it got very bad. Depression is probably part of the reason too. I am a bit better when it comes to that now though so thats cool.

None of my friends call me anymore either and it feels like if I dissapeared no one would notice though... I think my shyness and wierdness also makes some people uncomfortable.

 

[AngryKoreanMan]

My whole life I grew up having friends, but as I got a lot older, I grew distant and didn't like talking to people. It kinda scared me going out in public and seeing someone I know. Most of the time now, I spend at home, watching movies, reading and writing, playing video games, swimming and trying to entertain myself cause it's so hard for me to trust someone. Who do I know if they have good intentions or not. So many people took advantage of my kindness and once I realized there not even my friends it made me depressed. Overtime I grew more distant, got severly depressed. And now I'm starting to feel comfortable being alone, but at the same time all I really want is just a true friend I can count on and who will understand me. Not to top it off, but when I do make friends, over time they stop calling me. Maybe my shyness and weirdness makes them uncomfortalbe... I have no idea. Hope there's someone who understands what I mean by this post. I know I rambled on there but my mind is racing so fast.

The same thing happened to me when it comes to friends and just into my teen years around 16 I started to become very reserved and started to become very socially anxious. I would get anxious when going out no matter what it was, sometimes got panic attacks and would always try and dodge the social situations. I have always been the shy timid type anyway but it got very bad. Depression is probably part of the reason too. I am a bit better when it comes to that now though so thats cool.

None of my friends call me anymore either and it feels like if I dissapeared no one would notice though... I think my shyness and wierdness also makes some people uncomfortable.

I get that too, but my friends come and visit me at my house every few months or so and the usual greeting I get is " dude, i thought you were dead" or "have you been dead man? whats going on?"

 

[SlayerHendrix]

I get that too, but my friends come and visit me at my house every few months or so and the usual greeting I get is " dude, i thought you were dead" or "have you been dead man? whats going on?"

I got the exact same reaction from some ******** when I returned to school after not going in for like half a year due to anxiety issues. Safe to say they kept on bugging me as to why I was off for so long for the entire time I was at school. :/

 

[perfanoff]

I'm lucky to have good friends in Bulgaria.. well, it's well known we like to work less and take more time for socializing here.

You're welcome to move in and good friends will find you, but be careful what you may sacrifice to get that!

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Yeah I had anxiety issues during school and got picked on cause I was different. Always very shy and quiet, nice and everyone pounced on me. It was very strange indeed, I used to go home crying and wondering what's wrong with me? Why do people pick on me?

 

[Sci-Fi]

Some people are just cruel by nature, some are insecure about themselves so they pick on others to feel better, some are jealous of others, and some think it makes them look cool to belittle someone else.

 

[Antonio]

Some people are just cruel by nature, some are insecure about themselves so they pick on others to feel better, some are jealous of others, and some think it makes them look cool to belittle someone else.

Many of those walk side by side.

 

[SlayerHendrix]

Yeah, I view these ******** at school as if they were parasites, they destroy other peoples egos, which in turn boosts their own. It's pathetic really.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Yes I agree. I hated when they walked up to me and kept insiting I was talking about them. I'm like I don't even know you, why would I be talking about you?

They'd shout "don't get smart with me girl or I'll knock you out." I seriously wanted to knock them out cold but I held my anger back.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Oh I'm sorry, I misinterperted you. My bad lol. Well whatever is cool with you. I'm pretty open, not many things disgust me, except for spiders. Those things frighten me, I get nightmares of spiders crawling all over my bed. :shivers:

It is okay, it happened, do not worry about it.

You do not need to waste anymore time on a piece of garbage like me. So I won't bother you anymore.

 

[edamame721]

Hey, Wallflower, I just wanted you to know I was an outcast at school too. I'm not sure how that shaped your experience, but it made me less trusting of people and it took me a long time to find friends back in high school. The thing is, friends grow apart and they move, so even when you do get comfortable with a group of people, you have to do your best to meet new people anyway.

That said, it can be pretty hard to do. Maybe you can strike up a conversation with people you see often, like a security guard or postman? It can just be small talk (like asking if they saw the Olympics). It might be a good way to get yourself back to being social before making friends. Also, have you considered taking a swim class? Your classmates won't be looking to get anything from you and you'll have something naturally to talk about.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Oh I'm sorry, I misinterperted you. My bad lol. Well whatever is cool with you. I'm pretty open, not many things disgust me, except for spiders. Those things frighten me, I get nightmares of spiders crawling all over my bed. :shivers:

It is okay, it happened, do not worry about it.

You do not need to waste anymore time on a piece of garbage like me. So I won't bother you anymore.

Please don't say that.

Your a person too and have feelings. I know you think hard on yourself but your not a piece of garbage. I'm a kind soul and don't hate anyone. I'm still here for you.
Regardless on what you may say about yourself.

 

[perfanoff]

Oh I'm sorry, I misinterperted you. My bad lol. Well whatever is cool with you. I'm pretty open, not many things disgust me, except for spiders. Those things frighten me, I get nightmares of spiders crawling all over my bed. :shivers:

It is okay, it happened, do not worry about it.

You do not need to waste anymore time on a piece of garbage like me. So I won't bother you anymore.

Friend, as a guy to a guy, man up and stop putting yourself down.

Ever.