StatueInTheRain
Member
Right now, I think I have everybody else beat in the loneliness department.
I'm new here. The reason why I'm here is because I don't have any friends. I don't have a significant other, either. Now, the realization that I'm all alone has hit me like a freight train.
I feel like I'm at the bottom. I thought I was coping with my loneliness but I was really digging myself a hole. I've dug the whole as deep as I could get it, and there's no more room to dig, so now I'm just standing here looking around with the shovel in my hand. It's really dark and cold down here, because the hole is so deep that sunlight just doesn't reach the bottom.
The way that I have coped with loneliness seemed to work great, until it just stopped working. My way of dealing with it was that I simply decided I wasn't going to live in reality. I became a compulsive liar. I've only had one girlfriend in my entire life, but I didn't have any feelings for her.
At the time, I believed the "fake it until you make it" philosophy. So, I just made up a girlfriend and I told everyone about her. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but doing something wrong once makes it easier the next time.
Now, I still only had one girlfriend in my entire life, but I've had five phony ones. I spent all of my time dreaming about my imaginary life and I convinced myself my own BS was true. As long as I was able to convince myself my own BS was true, I thought I was really happy.
Anyway, I don't believe myself anymore. I'm no longer able to lie to myself, and the loneliness is crushing. My coping mechanism quit working all of the sudden. I can't escape from it. No matter where I go, it follows me.
I'm new here. The reason why I'm here is because I don't have any friends. I don't have a significant other, either. Now, the realization that I'm all alone has hit me like a freight train.
I feel like I'm at the bottom. I thought I was coping with my loneliness but I was really digging myself a hole. I've dug the whole as deep as I could get it, and there's no more room to dig, so now I'm just standing here looking around with the shovel in my hand. It's really dark and cold down here, because the hole is so deep that sunlight just doesn't reach the bottom.
The way that I have coped with loneliness seemed to work great, until it just stopped working. My way of dealing with it was that I simply decided I wasn't going to live in reality. I became a compulsive liar. I've only had one girlfriend in my entire life, but I didn't have any feelings for her.
At the time, I believed the "fake it until you make it" philosophy. So, I just made up a girlfriend and I told everyone about her. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but doing something wrong once makes it easier the next time.
Now, I still only had one girlfriend in my entire life, but I've had five phony ones. I spent all of my time dreaming about my imaginary life and I convinced myself my own BS was true. As long as I was able to convince myself my own BS was true, I thought I was really happy.
Anyway, I don't believe myself anymore. I'm no longer able to lie to myself, and the loneliness is crushing. My coping mechanism quit working all of the sudden. I can't escape from it. No matter where I go, it follows me.