I'm back, so hello everyone.

[echo]

Hey, I've been a member here since 2010 but haven't been here much. I met my boyfriend in this forum a month after I first joined (you CAN find love in this forum, hah). We're still together after 2 years but the relationship is getting shaky and he's having mixed feelings about the relationship, thinking if he wants to dump me or not..... Just the fact that he's not sure if he wants to continue the relationship with me is making me extremely depressed and feeling unwanted/rejected/unloved like he secretly wants me out of his life even though he says he still loves me, it's hard to believe when he's the one wanting to dump me. He has his friends, his family, his great life...I don't have anything except for extremely abusive and violent family and no friends, no job, no hobbies, no life, no motivation to live. I've been feeling very rejected and extremely lonely lately so I'm back here just to take things easy and to not feel so painfully alone. I'll probably not post much, I never know what to say to anything but I just wanted to say hi. It would be nice to make friends, relax together and such.

I always loved this forum from the first moment I found it in 2010, I'm very grateful for the person who created this forum for lonely people to help keep each other company. I am forever grateful for this forum. Heh, I see the donation button is still there, I remember my boyfriend was the one who suggested having a donation button there. Anyway, I'm rambling, I hope I can find some relief/distraction from my loneliness with the help of this forum.

 

[mintymint]

Welcome back

 

[Gutted]

Welcome back!

Sorry to hear of your hardships. I wouldn't be surprised if that was partly why your partner is having doubts. If he has what you say he has, he's probably thinking he could do better or something. Not trying to make things sound bad or anything. That's just how I see it from one light. Of course you both could have issues that we on ALL don't know about and they could be causing him to lose faith in the relationship.

Alas, I wish you luck~

 

[Aihpames]

Welcome back, Echo

If you ever fancy a chat, feel free to drop me a PM. Stay safe.

 

[Rosebolt]

Heey, welcome back.

I kind of understand how you must be feeling, when your only link to sanity/happiness is crumbling. I do hope you can find some nice people to talk to on here, as you say, this forum is really great. If there's anything i can do for you, feel free to message me any time. Doesn't matter how long the text is or anything, i'm here to listen and/or help.

Take care of yourself, okay?

 

[9006]

Welcome back to the forum.

 

[perfanoff]

Good to meet you echo.

 

[Edward W]

Welcome back!

Yes, it is a good place, I suspect there are a few new faces, well avatars, about. I was going to say, 'Don't be shy and join in', but I guess for this site that sometimes is an issue! But anyway, welcome back.

 

[Aihpames]

Don't think I've met a nicer person who I have so much in common with...

Thanks, A.L.L.

 

[lonelyfairy]

Welcome back!

 

[Sci-Fi]

Welcome back, sorry to hear about your troubles. Hopefully it all works out.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hey echo, welcome back to the forum. Your situation.. sounds familiar. Anyway, good luck, hope you find what you're looking for.

 

[echo]

Thank you everyone for welcoming me back.

Yes, it is a good place, I suspect there are a few new faces, well avatars, about. I was going to say, 'Don't be shy and join in', but I guess for this site that sometimes is an issue! But anyway, welcome back.

Yeah, since I first joined back in 2010, I never really got too into posting much or making any friends, I'm a loner even on a lonely forum (how pathetic of me haha). The very few people I grew to recognize or exchange a few friendly words with while I was a little active here seem to all have moved on now, hopefully they are all in a better place now.

Don't think I've met a nicer person who I have so much in common with...

Thanks, A.L.L.

Thanks, you are a nice person to talk with as well.

 

[Shipster0958]

Welcome back!

Hope things become smoother for you in your relationship. I've had some experience with a similar situation long ago. Feel free to drop me a message anytime you'd like to chat.

 

[*Sammy*]

Hi echo

I know how you feel hun i'm separated from my husband at the moment his choice coz he doesn't know what he wants anymore it hurts so much when he has all his family and i am so alone. I'm sorry your going through this hard time and i hope it works out for you in the end! If you ever wanna chat feel free to PM me i like a good chat

 

[Polar]

Sorry to hear about your troubles. I'd say a boyfriend who's "not sure about dumping or you or not" doesn't deserve you. But I'm sure things are more complicated than that. Have you already figured out why he's exactly so doubtful about the relationship?

He has his friends, his family, his great life...I don't have anything except for extremely abusive and violent family and no friends, no job, no hobbies, no life, no motivation to live.

I recognize this emotion. I felt the same two years ago, this overwhelming feeling of having nothing in my life. I changed that around meanwhile but I clearly remember how depressing that was to me. I can only tell you that this is what you should focus on, not as much your boyfriend. My ex broke up with me during that period and I can tell you I had never ever felt so sad before in my entire life. It was a deep sadness which has followed me for nearly two years, only gradually numbing down. And even though I was deeply in love with her, love wasn't the most important reason why I felt so bad about the breakup. Only afterwards I realized that I felt so awful because she was everything to me, she was my life, I had nothing else that I could identify myself with. When she left, she left nothing but a black hole behind.

It's such a bad position to be in. You need to find yourself and try to be more than Misses Boyfriend. Even if your relationship survives this, and I really hope it does! You can never really be in a completely healthy relationship when you feel like he's your life completely rather than being a very important part of it. When I found things which gave my life direction again other than romantic love, I started feeling soooo much better. And you know, even today I still hold some feelings for my ex, diminished but they're definitely still there. Nevertheless, it's a chapter which I closed and I don't feel my life is missing something with her not being in it anymore. And when the next big love comes along, I know I'll be in a much better position to build a more meaningful and stable relationship.

 

[Hearmenow2012]

Welcome back to the forums. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling that way *Hugs*. I hope that everything works out for the better