iwasaloverb4thiswar
Well-known member
I thought this when you left; let it happen. It hurts like hell but do not fight it. I know it should have stopped a long time ago.
Even lately it has been tasteless and we've been toying with the distance, it's only scary now that we've given it a name.
You've been very clear that you can severe yourself most easily, so why do I fight to prove you wrong? But I will be honest, each time you do this it has gotten easier for me to let you go.
I wonder what this night would have been like if I had never met you. It wouldn't have been significant, I probably would have been content to read a book and fall asleep. I try to remember what it feels like not to care, I need to be that person again.
And still in sunshine I'd like to call you and tell you when something happens. Can I do that, without the rest? Can't I just be your quirky friend that you can have fun with but aren't always trying to control all the time, always trying to fix? Always embarrassed of? You do that for other people, like John. There are parts about him you do not like but yet you still value him for others. Can you do that for me?
I do not hate you, in fact I like you, a lot. Thing is I don't think either of us can do what is right for ourselves, or what is right for the other person. It is too easy for me to hurt you and it is too easy for you to hurt me. I remember one night thinking after you had fallen asleep that I was going to get really hurt by this. And I did, many times. Lately though, even lately when it has been good, I haven't been too invested. It felt different, like I didn't need it as much. And actually, that is when I enjoyed you the most. I understand now what you meant awhile ago, you were right about that.
You still are my friend, I think at this point, probably my best one. I still want to meet you
Even lately it has been tasteless and we've been toying with the distance, it's only scary now that we've given it a name.
You've been very clear that you can severe yourself most easily, so why do I fight to prove you wrong? But I will be honest, each time you do this it has gotten easier for me to let you go.
I wonder what this night would have been like if I had never met you. It wouldn't have been significant, I probably would have been content to read a book and fall asleep. I try to remember what it feels like not to care, I need to be that person again.
And still in sunshine I'd like to call you and tell you when something happens. Can I do that, without the rest? Can't I just be your quirky friend that you can have fun with but aren't always trying to control all the time, always trying to fix? Always embarrassed of? You do that for other people, like John. There are parts about him you do not like but yet you still value him for others. Can you do that for me?
I do not hate you, in fact I like you, a lot. Thing is I don't think either of us can do what is right for ourselves, or what is right for the other person. It is too easy for me to hurt you and it is too easy for you to hurt me. I remember one night thinking after you had fallen asleep that I was going to get really hurt by this. And I did, many times. Lately though, even lately when it has been good, I haven't been too invested. It felt different, like I didn't need it as much. And actually, that is when I enjoyed you the most. I understand now what you meant awhile ago, you were right about that.
You still are my friend, I think at this point, probably my best one. I still want to meet you
