louMcntire
Well-known member
We've got a society where what's acceptable is to project an image of oneself where everything is always perfect. It's just not polite to drop the "my life isn't going too well" bomb in public. You can complain about how your boss is an ******* but not about how depressed or lonely you are to folks you meet. Loneliness just isn't a subject people like to talk of. And it's certainly not something they like to expose about themselves.
I sure as hell hate talking about how many friends I have (none) - unless I'm all cozy and anonymous behind my computer.
Being lonely (specifically not having friends) sounds like a really negative feature, one people would see as a serious, serious weakness of character. There's an easy correlation to be made between loneliness and social skills. And social skills define a person. It doesn't sound like something you can just tell someone about without having them draw an opinion of you. And that opinion isn't going to be positive - because who does that?
Us actually. We would not be so quick to judge someone if they told us they had no friends because we are living it - we can relate.
But I'll tell you, a few years ago I'd have jumped to conclusions, same as everyone else (And what a jerk I was). But isn't this the way everyone else would react to it? Don't we all think of the worst?
My loneliness is invisible. People won't see it by looking at me. But if they talk to me it's a feature I just cannot hide. It is the single most important element of my life because in the last few years it has shaped me into a completely different person. And I cannot be honest with myself and with others without talking about it.
If loneliness is perceived as a negative, a weakness. How do you go around telling people that you're all alone? Don't they push you away?
This seems irrational to me but maybe it isn't for others. What experience of this sort have you had? Have you ever been turned down because you simply did not have anyone else?
I sure as hell hate talking about how many friends I have (none) - unless I'm all cozy and anonymous behind my computer.
Being lonely (specifically not having friends) sounds like a really negative feature, one people would see as a serious, serious weakness of character. There's an easy correlation to be made between loneliness and social skills. And social skills define a person. It doesn't sound like something you can just tell someone about without having them draw an opinion of you. And that opinion isn't going to be positive - because who does that?
Us actually. We would not be so quick to judge someone if they told us they had no friends because we are living it - we can relate.
But I'll tell you, a few years ago I'd have jumped to conclusions, same as everyone else (And what a jerk I was). But isn't this the way everyone else would react to it? Don't we all think of the worst?
My loneliness is invisible. People won't see it by looking at me. But if they talk to me it's a feature I just cannot hide. It is the single most important element of my life because in the last few years it has shaped me into a completely different person. And I cannot be honest with myself and with others without talking about it.
If loneliness is perceived as a negative, a weakness. How do you go around telling people that you're all alone? Don't they push you away?
This seems irrational to me but maybe it isn't for others. What experience of this sort have you had? Have you ever been turned down because you simply did not have anyone else?
