Making "The List"

[Naleena]

I believe that in every relationship we have, we learn lessons about the relationship and ourselves. The more we experience different relationships, the more we know about what we want and don't want. I have read several places that it is good to make a list of qualities you want in a potential mate. You have "must have" qualities that your mate needs to possess and then "optional" things you would like for them to have but, can live without. Have any of you ever made a list of what you want in another person? I think it's good to have an idea of what you want in a relationship. Here is my list I had made a few months before I came here. I edited one line of it. What qualities do you want in your future mate?


Qualities in a mate

1. Must be a very compassionate and loving person. (must)

2. Must be a giving person and wants/seeks to help others. (must)

3. Is educated and intelligent. (must to a point/ negotiable)

4. Wants to be a better person and seeks to be by examining his life, learning, etc.. (must)

5. Is a spiritual and open minded person. (must)

6. Is empathic, understanding, and accepting. (must)

7. He is intuitive and a person who feels. (must)

8. He can cook, do manual guy things, and helps around the house. (must / negotiable)

9. He thinks I am the greatest and loves me for who I am. (must)

10. He is funny. (must)

11. He is my best friend. (must)

12. We are very much alike. (must)

13. He is tall (optional)

14. He is XXXX XX XXX. (edit) Ummm, that's for me to know...lol

15. He has plenty of hair, preferably long. (optional)

16. He is artistic. (optional)

 

[BlackCat]

My list

She must:

1. Not be ignorant

2. Not be shallow

3. Not be morbidly obese

4. MUST be weird

5. Must be open minded

6. Must not take advantage of my kindness and love

It would be great (unnecessary) if She:

1. Had red hair

2. Was petite

We can't get what all we want in a person... But some things are just necessary.

 

[sleepflower]

must hate slipknot. and thats it.

 

[Antihero]

She must be:

Kind, a little eccentric, has musical tastes not entirely different from my own, reasonably intelligent, mature, someone I can just be myself around, be my best friend as well as my lover, not obese (yeah, I am well aware that I am a swallow prick who deserves to be alone), not pretentious or snobby, not a devout christian (or a devout anything else too I guess), not a slob, and not overly dependent... and that's all I can think of at the moment.

 

[Antihero]

must hate slipknot. and thats it.

Oh, and this too!

 

[Unacceptance]

must hate slipknot. and thats it.

Well in that case, here I am!

Granted my one request is someone who can tolerate me. I'm screwed.

 

[EveWasFramed]

must hate slipknot. and thats it.

ROFLMAOOOOO!!!!!!!!

 

[kelthuzad]

my one request is someone who can tolerate me.

ditto

 

[Unacceptance]

It's kind of one of the things that's always been a drag when I think about it. Because the type of woman that I think of as a dream girl is also the type who would be able to do better than me and would know it.

Even my fantasies conspire against me.

 

[Silvernight]

Ok, my list.

He must:

Be communicative (I'm the quiet one, so he should be more talkative for it to work)

Be my best friend

Be tolerant of my quirks

Caring but not too clingy

Be weird

Be humorous

Be open-minded and not given to homo/ethno/insert any other-phobia

Share at least one of my interests (otherwise there'll be no point of connection)

Like travelling

Be intelligent (and that does not necessarily mean having a certain university degree per se)

Not want a houseful of children or at least have nothing against adoption

As to physical appearance, it would be great if he:

Had long hair or somewhat curly hair, the exact color is not important (optional but would be nice)

Not be obese (a must)

Be taller than me (a must but that's an easy feat to accomplish since anyone's taller than me )

 

[Silvernight]

My list

She must:

1. Not be ignorant

2. Not be shallow

3. Not be morbidly obese

4. MUST be weird

5. Must be open minded

6. Must not take advantage of my kindness and love

It would be great (unnecessary) if She:

1. Had red hair

2. Was petite

We can't get what all we want in a person... But some things are just necessary.

Yo, BlackCat I qualify! Even for the last two points Just kidding

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Becuareful what you ask for becuase you might get it.
I'd be especific as much as I can.

I forgot to add "a person that won't drive me nucken futz". the last time..lol

 

[Steel]

She should:

Be a free spirit
Be happy to disagree without feeling challenged
Be caring and compassionate
Be my best friend
Not be bigoted
Enjoy listening to music
Be Lita Ford (optional)
Have a sense of humour, like making people laugh
Love me for who I am
Be in touch with her inner child. Snowfight!
Respect the world we live in
Be spiritual over material
Not have poor personal hygiene!
Be intelligent
Have an enquiring nature
Be open to new experiences
Be completely open about, and enjoy sex
Be faithful, and loyal
Not want kids

The last has caused me far more trouble than any of the others.

Ok, so its taken me until now to finish the list. I chose to leave out the physical things I like, simply because firstly there is nothing too weird in them, and secondly I like to think I'm not shallow.

 

[loketron]

her names gotta be brittany and she must of known me in high school, and we jammed together, and now she must play guitar better than me. tha'd be perfect.......*Warm smile*

 

[pkg_inc]

She should
*be able to live an independent life
*be good at giving and taking
*be somewhat organized
*not be too emotional ('cold personality')
*be cuddly in the evening ^^

Be in touch with her inner child. Snowfight!

She could
*have short (black) hair
*have quirks (possibly lots)
*enjoy music
*have a good singing voice
*enjoy walking in the rain (at night)

 

[davechaos]

I have to say that Naleena is right. There are many things we accept as things that we can live with when actually we can't. Making my list was the most important thing I have ever done and it has allowed me to focus my search for the one person for me. I won't accept anything that is not for me and if that means that I end up being single for the rest of my life then so be it.

 

[Naleena]

((((((((((((((((((((((Dave!))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Hey you! Nice to see you back around here
I love ya little brother! **giggles**

 

[ClosetGeek]

He should

1. be handsome. I am not talking about split image of Brad Pitt. I mean I must find him attractive and sexy.

2. be loyal and never cheat on me or think about cheating on me.

3. have a job that he really enjoys.

4. love beep. (that's for me to know)

*beep=censored

 

[bookbinder]

14. He is XXXX XX XXX. (edit) Ummm, that's for me to know...lol

Leaving the same amount of Xs as letters makes it very easy for me to know what that is.



...not that I don't agree....

 

[RobertJW]

1. That she has a pulse.

That is all