Not Confident or Too Confident

[AmytheTemperamental]

I can't seem to get it right. I'm either way below confident, or I am too confident and sure of things. I can't seem to be just confident enough to get through this rough patch.

Anyone else have issues like this?
:club:

 

[Nicolelt]

I have no confidence. I just fake it til I make it.

I guess it depends on what the situation is.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I should have worded this better. My over confidence is due to a distorted reality. I wish things were how they used to be, but they never could be without the lies involved. I was on top of the world, kind of high on life, if you will. I guess I'm just terrified to value myself any higher than the pit I am stuck in due to some of this stuff going on.

 

[Bob Arctor]

I think that disillusionment is an inherent part of evolving as a person. Disillusionment can appear in many forms, but generally the end result is that we feel less secure about ourselves and/or the world. When you look at the hero archetype from myths, movies or whatever else, the general experience they go through begins with their world being turned upside down. There's a tremendous amount of doubt and painful struggle. Then a bunch of other stuff happens, you know they get like helpers and gifts along the way. Often there's a symbolic or metaphorical death and rebirth.

Ultimately they gain something they didn't have before. They gain a new strength, a new awareness. The struggle they experienced becomes interwoven with their new life, and without having had to question themselves and push themselves through unthinkable adversity they never would have discovered their real power. I believe that this is everyone's story, whether they're aware of it or not. It happens on many different levels to different people, but we all experience it. To quote Helen Keller, "life is either a daring adventure, or nothing."

I believe you can get out of whatever situation is causing you to be unhappy, I honestly do. I believe that you can find your confidence again, so long as you don't give up.

 

[Nicolelt]

I should have worded this better. My over confidence is due to a distorted reality. I wish things were how they used to be, but they never could be without the lies involved. I was on top of the world, kind of high on life, if you will. I guess I'm just terrified to value myself any higher than the pit I am stuck in due to some of this stuff going on.

Don't sell yourself short, you can get out of that pit. My sister and I call this the "rut". And several times in life we have called each other and complained about being in the "rut", where at one point we were conquering our world, and then we either couldn't climb any higher, or we fell back down.

I fall into the rut a lot, actually dangling on the edge at the moment. I know it's hard to dig yourself out when you feel like the world is against you.

A little exercise I do when I feel this way, is keep a little journal. That journal is title "What did I do today to change my current situation", I only write in it when I am having these struggles and times in life. And everyday I try to change my current situation. And it can be small tasks, like I organized my desk to make working easier. I believe there is a thread on here you can do that in to use if you like.

But anyways, after a little time, I start feeling better and don't need it.

I believe you can get out of whatever situation is causing you to be unhappy, I honestly do. I believe that you can find your confidence again, so long as you don't give up.

And I agree, I think you can do it.

 

[AnotherLonelyGuy]

Not Confident or Too Confident about what ?

 

[Regumika]

When you look at the hero archetype from myths, movies or whatever else, the general experience they go through begins with their world being turned upside down. There's a tremendous amount of doubt and painful struggle. Then a bunch of other stuff happens, you know they get like helpers and gifts along the way. Often there's a symbolic or metaphorical death and rebirth.

Somehow this made me think that... when the [character] gains a new view or somehow finds themselves, their old way of life is put behind them.

Is there a way to have your current status/situation AND the new view? Is it possible to not give up something old for something new?

 

[SofiasMami]

I should have worded this better. My over confidence is due to a distorted reality. I wish things were how they used to be, but they never could be without the lies involved. I was on top of the world, kind of high on life, if you will. I guess I'm just terrified to value myself any higher than the pit I am stuck in due to some of this stuff going on.

Don't sell yourself short, you can get out of that pit. My sister and I call this the "rut". And several times in life we have called each other and complained about being in the "rut", where at one point we were conquering our world, and then we either couldn't climb any higher, or we fell back down.

I fall into the rut a lot, actually dangling on the edge at the moment. I know it's hard to dig yourself out when you feel like the world is against you.

A little exercise I do when I feel this way, is keep a little journal. That journal is title "What did I do today to change my current situation", I only write in it when I am having these struggles and times in life. And everyday I try to change my current situation. And it can be small tasks, like I organized my desk to make working easier. I believe there is a thread on here you can do that in to use if you like.

But anyways, after a little time, I start feeling better and don't need it.

I agree with the rut characterization. I even tell myself sometimes that I'm in a rut. We each have our own ways of climbing out; try different things, including the advice here, until you find what works for you.

-Teresa

 

[FreedomFromLiberty]

We need some more info, JSG. I find it hard to relate to or understand this abstract concept of too little AND too much confidence.

I'm confuzzled.