I'm wondering if I have reason to be paranoid about a certain situation.
I met a guy online a few weeks ago, and he's been extremely helpful to me. He helped me to restructure my resume, and he's been giving me some helpful tips for finding a job. He's really smart and REALLY established. He lives in Canada.
I did not give him my real name; I generally avoid giving my real name to folks I meet online, at least until I feel comfortable enough to share that kind of information.
Well, from the beginning, he's been a bit creepy (to me). When I sent him my resume, I deleted my address, phone number and email address. I left my first name (because I inadvertently left it associated with the email I DID give him, thus I couldn't hide that) but changed my middle initial and my last name. After he gave me his first round of feedback, he said something to the effect of "Good job, Ms. (fake name used on resume)" with a wink. He seemed to be very pleased that he knew my last name; obviously, he studied the personal information portion of my resume when he was supposed to be focused on the content. He's also been pushing me hard to get a profile on LinkedIn. I hesitated because I knew I'd have to use my real name. Finally, I got one but I didn't give him the link, and I didn't tell him I had one. I said I was "working on it." Suddenly, he tells me one day "Your LinkedIn profile looks great," so he went and looked me up (OR he saw that I found his profile. I didn't know at the time that LinkedIn lets users know who looks at their profile). Obviously, I was NOT happy because my real name was there.
Another time, one of his messenger accounts got hacked. I got scared, so I got another account just in case it was HIM doing something funny. I added him to the new account because I didn't know for sure, but it was under a name he was unfamiliar with. He asked, "One question? Are you (the name I'd given) or (the name on the new account)?" as if this is need-to-know information. I explained that the new name was the name of one of my favorite songs. But I just find it odd that he has to know my real name.
He never mentioned the fact that he saw the other name on LinkedIn, so I didn't think he noticed. He'd only said that he found my profile. But I went and changed my last name to the initial just in case he did notice. Now, he's on my case, telling me ("Ms. LASTNAME or LASTNAME, whatever your name is") that I need to change it back to my full last name and that he noticed my last name was different from what he saw on my resume.
Am I being paranoid? I just don't see why he has to have my real name. I am really torn because he has been SO patient with helping me with my job search and given me ideas I would have never thought of myself. However, he seems to be preoccupied with knowing who I really am. I don't think that's necessary to help me tweak my resume and give me tips on landing a job. As you can see, he's highly aware of changes I make on my profile or names I put on my resume. I just find it weird.
His full name is all over the internet, so I assume his name is real - first AND last name. Yet he doesn't seem to mind that I have his whole name. Here I am, though, concerned that he now knows my last name, my city and my job history (as it was on my resume). I know his full name, his city, his job history and even how he looks, but I don't see him breaking a sweat about it as I'm doing. Perhaps I'm over-thinking this?
There's so many crazy ass people out there, and I hear so many crazy ass stories, that, up until this point, I've been extremely careful about revealing myself. Can he do anything with what he knows (my name, city and work history), or would he need more, like ... address, how I look, etc.? OR can he use what he already knows to GET my address and other information?
He does travel for work to the US and will, in fact, be in my state four months from now. So I just want to make sure I'm okay.
Thank you all!
I met a guy online a few weeks ago, and he's been extremely helpful to me. He helped me to restructure my resume, and he's been giving me some helpful tips for finding a job. He's really smart and REALLY established. He lives in Canada.
I did not give him my real name; I generally avoid giving my real name to folks I meet online, at least until I feel comfortable enough to share that kind of information.
Well, from the beginning, he's been a bit creepy (to me). When I sent him my resume, I deleted my address, phone number and email address. I left my first name (because I inadvertently left it associated with the email I DID give him, thus I couldn't hide that) but changed my middle initial and my last name. After he gave me his first round of feedback, he said something to the effect of "Good job, Ms. (fake name used on resume)" with a wink. He seemed to be very pleased that he knew my last name; obviously, he studied the personal information portion of my resume when he was supposed to be focused on the content. He's also been pushing me hard to get a profile on LinkedIn. I hesitated because I knew I'd have to use my real name. Finally, I got one but I didn't give him the link, and I didn't tell him I had one. I said I was "working on it." Suddenly, he tells me one day "Your LinkedIn profile looks great," so he went and looked me up (OR he saw that I found his profile. I didn't know at the time that LinkedIn lets users know who looks at their profile). Obviously, I was NOT happy because my real name was there.
Another time, one of his messenger accounts got hacked. I got scared, so I got another account just in case it was HIM doing something funny. I added him to the new account because I didn't know for sure, but it was under a name he was unfamiliar with. He asked, "One question? Are you (the name I'd given) or (the name on the new account)?" as if this is need-to-know information. I explained that the new name was the name of one of my favorite songs. But I just find it odd that he has to know my real name.
He never mentioned the fact that he saw the other name on LinkedIn, so I didn't think he noticed. He'd only said that he found my profile. But I went and changed my last name to the initial just in case he did notice. Now, he's on my case, telling me ("Ms. LASTNAME or LASTNAME, whatever your name is") that I need to change it back to my full last name and that he noticed my last name was different from what he saw on my resume.
Am I being paranoid? I just don't see why he has to have my real name. I am really torn because he has been SO patient with helping me with my job search and given me ideas I would have never thought of myself. However, he seems to be preoccupied with knowing who I really am. I don't think that's necessary to help me tweak my resume and give me tips on landing a job. As you can see, he's highly aware of changes I make on my profile or names I put on my resume. I just find it weird.
His full name is all over the internet, so I assume his name is real - first AND last name. Yet he doesn't seem to mind that I have his whole name. Here I am, though, concerned that he now knows my last name, my city and my job history (as it was on my resume). I know his full name, his city, his job history and even how he looks, but I don't see him breaking a sweat about it as I'm doing. Perhaps I'm over-thinking this?
There's so many crazy ass people out there, and I hear so many crazy ass stories, that, up until this point, I've been extremely careful about revealing myself. Can he do anything with what he knows (my name, city and work history), or would he need more, like ... address, how I look, etc.? OR can he use what he already knows to GET my address and other information?
He does travel for work to the US and will, in fact, be in my state four months from now. So I just want to make sure I'm okay.
Thank you all!
