Resorting to alcohol (and other things)

[Cathedral]

A few weeks ago, out of curiosity, I tried alcohol. I like the feeling I get from 2 cans of beer worth of alcohol, but not much more. I have been taking Zoloft and Abilify for several months, to no result. I recently got switched over to Citalopram or whatever it's called. But since discovering that a little bit of alcohol can make you feel good, I don't think I have any need for these worthless depressants. It's not life changing, but it's a small improvement.

You see, I have life-long problems with depression and loneliness and on those nights when I just feel so angry because of it, so I take a few shots of vodka and in a few minutes, I start feeling a little better. Now, I wish pot was legal, so that I can safely try that and see what it does to me.

But for now, I might have to end up drinking alcohol just about every day to cope with being so alone and depressed. I don't have but 1-2 friends I communicate with online. Even less IRL. I hate that. I want to socialize a little bit, not feel like no one cares about me nor my wellbeing, and having to resort to drugs, things which could harm my rather weak and fat body.

I also binge eat, which I am trying to stop. Over a period of several months, I have gained so much weight. Last spring, I think I was 225 lbs, now I am over 300 lbs. It's getting harder for me to walk a mile or so, because of my weight. And starting this spring, when I have to go back to college, I will have to take the city bus there and the bus stop is quite a few blocks away.

It would do me good to get a little walking in, but I wish I didn't have this weight on me to begin with, because after even a half a mile, my ankles begin to hurt.

Another thing that bothers me about going back to college is that I have almost no social skills at all. I cannot make any friends on the Internet, much less IRL. Mostly due to my Asperger's Syndrome. And the fact that due to my childhood, I was never taught anything by my deadbeat parents nor my family.

I hope this wasn't too incoherent, because I suck at writing. I have almost no talent in anything. I give up too easily. I tend to put forth the minimal amount of effort into things. That hurts me. I'm a better person than that. I must be. Because I want friends and a girlfriend and I want them NOW!

 

[Badjedidude]

Everyone seems to have Asperger's these days. If you ask me it's just a way of shifting blame and refusing responsibility for one's behaviors. *shrug*

Anyway, I hope things go better for you and welcome to the site!

 

[Mr. Sir]

Everyone seems to have Asperger's these days. If you ask me it's just a way of shifting blame and refusing responsibility for one's behaviors. *shrug*

^ What he said.

 

[Cathedral]

Everyone seems to have Asperger's these days. If you ask me it's just a way of shifting blame and refusing responsibility for one's behaviors. *shrug*

Anyway, I hope things go better for you and welcome to the site!

I haven't met one person who has Asperger's Syndrome or anything like that IRL. Also, I don't seem to be able to "fit in" to autism forums in general. I tend to get ignored or flamed and I just get frustrated as a result! If I am supposedly autistic, yet can't properly conduct myself on an autism forum, then what the Hell is wrong with me? I just don't get it.

I try not to shift blame onto my autism symptoms, but the temptation to do so can be quite strong... How else can I explain my complete lack of social skills, even on the Internet?

 

[LGH1288]

Hi Cathedral -- Using alcohol to solve your many problems is a STUPID idea. Chances are that you'll just compound these problems by adding alcoholism to the list. Don't be foolish! LG:-(

 

[stuff4096]

I agree with LGH. You should really find healthier ways to cope with your situation, which by the way I can understand your frustration. Resorting to alcohol (and other things) will bring about their own set of problems. I would hate to see you go down that road. Good luck to you!

 

[Blue Sky]

I drank alcohol everyday for many years, and it nearly ruined my life. With heavy drinking alcohol can become a depressant and cause many other problems, both physical and mentally. I had to go to AA to stop drinking and it took me about two years to stop fully. These days I don't drink alcohol at all and I never get the urge to under any circumstances.

 

[kaede]

Hi there, I just wanted to add that any alcohol you drink will contribute to your weight gain. Sure it's nice to feel relaxed after having a drink once in a while, but it's not a good habit to get into. I believe that those who can get through day to day life without using alcohol/illegal drugs to numb them are the strong ones in life. So stay strong. P.S. you don't suck at writing.

 

[Minus]

I would have to agree with those that are warning you about the alcohol. I see nothing wrong with a few social drinks but what you are describing is self medicating. There is a real chance of going the path that Blue Sky mentions.

Welcome

 

[Marik_757]

I used to be a perfectionest and exericse almost everyday keeping myself in a good shape. But crap started happening and I just gave up overall and didn't care. I started drinking, and just recently about a month ago started smoking. To take care of the weight gain with drinking I resorted to fat buner pills instead of just going to gym like I usually do.

All these things relaxes me, but is it healthy? I don't really care ... If I had a chance to stop myself from going down this road would I have stopped myself? Yes I would.

Trust me, a lot of people will lose a lot of respect for you as you go down this road ... If you can stop youself now then do so!!

 

[Callie]

Alcohol doesn't solve anything or fix anything. It won't help you in the long run. All alcohol does is allow you to deny everything, to live in a fantasy world of your own making. When the alcohol wears off, you will be back where you started from or worse. So eventually you will start drinking more and more so you don't have to deal with life at all. You will become an alcoholic, so you don't have to face life.
Find a better way...there are so many options out there. Even for the Asperger's. You just have to keep trying until you find something that works for you.

You can trust me on both accounts, my husband is an alcoholic and my son has Asperger's. *runs from BJD cuz I mentioned the A word :O "

 

[Cathedral]

I just want to forget about the past and live for today and tomorrow. I want this depression to just go away and for everything to fall into place.

 

[Callie]

I would like the same, but alcohol won't allow you to do that.

 

[kaede]

Also it's important to remember that everyone goes through phases. Right now some people are in phases of drinking more than usual, or doing other unhealthy habits, especially bc of the holidays. But think of it as a phase. Don't be too hard on yourself, allow yourself to pass through this phase and to move out of it into something more healthy. Don't believe that you will be depressed forever, people can and do move in and out of it, people do recover. Allow yourself to think of the possibilities of recovering from it and that you won't feel this way forever.

 

[Harold_King]

I disagree with those who think alcohol is a bad idea. It is a method of self-medicating without getting others involved. I do it every day. I don't drink at work, and I don't drink and drive, but when I'm home I drink until I pass out.

Yes, it is almost surely shortening my lifespan, but I'm ok with that.

I find the key to a successful drinking career is variety. Beer is fine, but mix it up with different cocktails, different liquors, different tastes and experiences.

 

[Cathedral]

I do NOT drink until I pass out. The first time I got myself drunk, I hated that feeling, I just had to lie down I felt so nauseated and lightheaded!

And I don't like beer. It just plain sucks. It tastes really bad, like most cheap liquor does, but also, it has relatively low alcohol by volume, meaning that you have to drink can after can (or bottle after bottle) of piss-water tasting crap just to get a buzz. Do not want! Instead, I drink 7 dollar a bottle strawberry vodka. 35% alcohol by volume, so all it takes is a few bad-tasting sips and you're buzzed. A few more though and you might become drunk, and I don't really want that again. If people drink alcohol for the feeling rather than the taste, then why the hell do they still drink BEER when they can drink something with higher alcohol by volume instead, like VODKA or RUM?

 

[Adrolak]

Well, I don't drink. However, I do, sometimes, when I need to think enjoy a cigar. I don't chain smoke, or smoke anything but fine cigars, and if I do it's usually only part of a cigar, and it can take me 2-3 months to finish ONE cigar! That's a VERY long time! I don't resort on it, and even though as much as I know I shouldn't, for a lot of reasons, it helps me think, and reflect.

 

[Limlim]

I find a couple of ceasars or some baileys and coffee helps take the edge off at the end of the day. Especially the latter mixed with coffee. have a cup of that then switch over to straight coffee for the rest of the night.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

If ur depressed..drinking alchol will simply make u more depressed...
alcohol is a depressent.
wheather ur an alcoholic or not..
ur body will start getting addicted to it. Itll become a visouse cycle..

itll also dystroy you forntal lobe And liver..whcih will fresia up ur thinking even more.

On a good note u can attend AA after u get totally honeysuckle face N fresia up ur life. And meet some very nice people in recovery.hahahahaaaa

 

[Callie]

I disagree with those who think alcohol is a bad idea. It is a method of self-medicating without getting others involved. I do it every day. I don't drink at work, and I don't drink and drive, but when I'm home I drink until I pass out.

Yes, it is almost surely shortening my lifespan, but I'm ok with that.

I find the key to a successful drinking career is variety. Beer is fine, but mix it up with different cocktails, different liquors, different tastes and experiences.

hmmm...that makes you an alcoholic. So be it, but don't advertise it as a good idea for others.