![Thomas]](https://cdn.imagearchive.com/alonelylife/data/avatars/m/14/14186.jpg?1631136400){kind=avatar}
Thomas]
Well-known member
Hey,
Perhaps in the past, you were a lot more closed.. "numb" as you described. Probably letting people know a lot less about how you feel. I know this. I've been there, and honestly I think I am still am there.
But I know how I feel inside, and so do you. It seems to me that you clearly think about things a lot, and that you have a really good sense of what's right and what isn't. You are not and never were 'stone', because I bet you've always felt deeply inside and thought about things and consequences x times more than others may do.
And I promise you I know about change. I know how it feels to experience something that makes you give up inside and start blaming yourself. Becoming the emotionless person you said I seemed like from my very first post on this forum!
I know I'm talking a lot, and you probably don't know where half of what I've said is coming from... my point is that I really don't think you should blame yourself by being this "wall of stone" in the past, for hurting others. I absolutely understand that you don't like to cause pain to others, and that's really great. But perhaps you're not the cause of as much pain as you think you are =x.
It's really difficult for me to comment and perhaps I've commented too much already; I'm running on assumptions that I've picked up from reading things you've said. You seem like too nice and too thoughtful of a person to be responsible for hurting others like you think you are. Blaming yourself is the easiest thing to do... finding resolve and giving yourself a break is the challenge =x
I get that you feel regret about your friend... but whatever you do, don't start saying to yourself that it's perhaps justified because you've lacked on email responses to other people before. Every situation is different...
As for your question (sorry it's taken paragraphs to get here): the reason I am concerned about coming off as judgemental is because I truly feel that I am not that =x But I have a knack of saying things the wrong way I think... I always feel like I try to have an open mind, cos I want to try and be fair
I think it's amazing that you're afraid of hurting people, but I bet on it that you're not as responsible as you think you are for this
Over-reacting was totally the wrong word, I am sorry. But you don't need to be sorry for sure Perhaps I am relating what I read from you too much to what I have experienced the past few years... but I just think you're being really hard on yourself =x I hope all of this made at least some sense
PS. I think the email you sent was nice, and the intro appropriate.
Perhaps in the past, you were a lot more closed.. "numb" as you described. Probably letting people know a lot less about how you feel. I know this. I've been there, and honestly I think I am still am there.
But I know how I feel inside, and so do you. It seems to me that you clearly think about things a lot, and that you have a really good sense of what's right and what isn't. You are not and never were 'stone', because I bet you've always felt deeply inside and thought about things and consequences x times more than others may do.
And I promise you I know about change. I know how it feels to experience something that makes you give up inside and start blaming yourself. Becoming the emotionless person you said I seemed like from my very first post on this forum!
I know I'm talking a lot, and you probably don't know where half of what I've said is coming from... my point is that I really don't think you should blame yourself by being this "wall of stone" in the past, for hurting others. I absolutely understand that you don't like to cause pain to others, and that's really great. But perhaps you're not the cause of as much pain as you think you are =x.
It's really difficult for me to comment and perhaps I've commented too much already; I'm running on assumptions that I've picked up from reading things you've said. You seem like too nice and too thoughtful of a person to be responsible for hurting others like you think you are. Blaming yourself is the easiest thing to do... finding resolve and giving yourself a break is the challenge =x
I get that you feel regret about your friend... but whatever you do, don't start saying to yourself that it's perhaps justified because you've lacked on email responses to other people before. Every situation is different...
As for your question (sorry it's taken paragraphs to get here): the reason I am concerned about coming off as judgemental is because I truly feel that I am not that =x But I have a knack of saying things the wrong way I think... I always feel like I try to have an open mind, cos I want to try and be fair
I think it's amazing that you're afraid of hurting people, but I bet on it that you're not as responsible as you think you are for this Over-reacting was totally the wrong word, I am sorry. But you don't need to be sorry for sure
Perhaps I am relating what I read from you too much to what I have experienced the past few years... but I just think you're being really hard on yourself =x I hope all of this made at least some sense PS. I think the email you sent was nice, and the intro appropriate.
