Shy people belong in their homes.

[Doubt The Rabbit]

My eyes are burning...my head hurts...my stomach is in knots...my feet are wet.

Why did I ever agree to go? I should have stayed home, curled up under my blanket, chatting and reading. That's what I should have done.

And yet, I go and SPEAK. All those amazing poets before me...and there I was...psyching myself up...taking in their energy...repeating the words over and over again until I could say them with my eyes closed...telling myself I had to be GOOD.

And then I blew it. Nervous as ever. Shy as always. I let the words dribble from my mouth...stepped off stage...sank into my chair. My ride dropped me off...it was a shame that he had to see it, even though at the time I felt like I wanted him to. It made for an awkward ride home. I feel like honeysuckle. I was a total joke.

Had I stayed home, everything would have been fine.

Now I'm just waiting for tomorrow to come so I can convince myself that today never happened.

[/rant]

 

[SophiaGrace]

no! Don't say that! Everything would not have been fine if you had just stayed home!

You had courage! You went! That counts for something! Truely it does.

I know you feel as though you failed, but you didn't fail DTR. You went 3/4ths of the way and just need to work on the last 1/4th.

1/2 you went. 1/4 you practiced what you were to say. Just, need to work on not clamming up.

YAY for you for going and doing it!

 

[VanillaCreme]

It was an experience, and one you can laugh at later in life. We all have those moments.
















P.S. - I miss you. (D)

 

[floffyschneeman]

*hugs* wabbit.

I agree with Soph. At least you had the courage to go out there. And when you've gathered enough guts again to go out, it will be less nerve wrecking. A teacher told us in class before, to overcome shyness, you just have to embarrass yourself over and over again, so you'll grow a thick face. It's something I can't do (d)

You could have stayed home, but you will always keep with you a feeling of self-hate for being too shy and too scared to try.

 

[Bread]

I agree with Soph on this- if you had not gone, who knows if you would have ever managed to muster courage? It's important to keep on trying as long as you can, even with gritted teeth and no certain outlook on success. Not trying is simply reducing chances of success to zero. And eventually, a time will come when you'll have to look back at your life, and the chances taken and the ones you let slip past your fingers. I still say that with life, a small chance is better than none. At least, as long as the chances don't go below zero point something per cent.

Still...feels like crap now, but at least you had the guts, as everybody else already said. I'm hoping you'll find that in time, you'll be able to get up on that stage again, and at that time, enthrall the audience with your poetic pamache. If not, at least you can revel in the feeling of having gone out there and delivered your artistic talent to a crowd when once you faltered before stage fright.

Best of luck to your next attempt.

 

[lonely_visionary]

The thing to remember is that the audience will have forgotten you by the time the next act comes on stage. They will forget you the next time, and the next time as well, but that's how you practice. After that you will have got the hang of it and THEN they will remember you.

Besides, anyone who listens to poetry must be at least half decent, and will sympathise. It's not like failing at a drunken comedy club, now THAT would be ugly.

 

[WishingWell]

Doubt the Rabbit!

Congratulations on taking the huge step you did and, not only getting out of your home, but performing live on stage!

You did not blow it! You were just not perfect! To me, I believe you call it "stage fright! And, even people who aren't shy get that--EVEN PROFESSIONALS some times!

I agree with lonley_visionary, that by the time the next act came on stage, that had forgotten that you JUST WERE NOT PERFECT--and WHO IS????

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, just keep practicing and DO IT AGAIN...it will get easier! I am proud of you--now, BE PROUD OF YOURSELF, please!

 

[Yeah!]

Mitch Hedberg got stage fright so bad, he some times performed entire acts facing away from the audience or lying on the floor. He always wore those sunglasses because he would almost always do the show with his eyes tightly shut. This guy was a professional comedian!

Stage fright can bite you in the ass, and it will continue to bite you in the ass. But, the more time you spend on stage, the longer the run up it has to take before it gets to said ass. The initial hurdles are the hardest, no doubt, and they're also the most important. You can't get better at something you don't practice!

 

[jjam]

Do it again!


and then again!

and again!

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

Well...not exactly stage fright. Don't get me wrong, I've done performances...recitals...all that jazz before. I've sang even though I'm not a good singer. I've danced even though I'm not a good dancer. It's not the stage that's scary. It's not the audience that's scary. It's the people. Had there been just one person, I'd have done the same thing. Had there been nobody, I'm sure I'd be much better.

Had the audience been made up of (muzzled) dogs, it would've been infinitely less scary...although more freakish. If I can't read a person's face or voice and adjust my words and tone to make them a little happier with what I'm saying, I become intimidated. And here were over fifty-some people, the light blinding me too much to see more than ten of them, too much chatter to hear what any one person was saying (yeah they were pretty rude...) AND I was the LAST act up. I was supposed to bring it all home...and I failed (maybe that was a lot of pressure too). I couldn't get a read on anyone. Just one person would do. The funny thing about audiences is that they'll clap just to see you off the stage...but you never know if they liked what you said. I guess that's better than being booed. Maybe just a silence would have been better.

Still though, maybe I'm a bit of a perfectionist...and I feel like now I HAVE to try it again (after just thinking "NO WAY!"). At least to do it well just once. Maybe somewhere smaller...where I can actually SEE my ******* audience, and not some annoying lights. Besides...after showing my writing mentor (whose husband was my ride) the way the poem was SUPPOSED to be read, she liked it a lot. I know that had I done it the way I should have, it would have been ******* great. So that makes me feel like I absolutely must try it again...even though I'll probably just as easily stay home. I suppose if my mentor dragged me to a coffee house somewhere and bribed me with all the coffee I could burn my esophagus with, I'd do it

Thanks for the kind words and advice, guys.

 

[alonewanderer]

The last time I performed it was in front of 1 judge on a stage, I freaked out horribly bad and ended up drenched in sweat after 10 seconds and had the worst panic attack ever. I ended up walking off stage and breaking my big toe punting my saxophone+case 15 feet away when I got out of sight. I never knew I had stage fright, I don't think I have it anymore but also I don't do anything infront of people without copious amounts of alcohol.

r.i.p. mitch

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

(((wanderer))) Saxophone, huh? That's pretty cool

 

[I'm Fine]

I got stage-fright the last but one time I performed - basically because I *could* see the audience (always so much easier when I couldn't). I had to force myself to go on stage again (even though I knew I wouldn't be pursuing a career in it) because I couldn't let that be my last experience of it. It's hard but you can do it. As everyone else has said, there's no substitute for experience.

Good luck *hugs*

 

[alonewanderer]

(((wanderer))) Saxophone, huh? That's pretty cool

Secretly secret in the secretest way...

 

[Yeah!]

The first time I ever played live, I froze solid and made a weird gurgling noise. Then I had a nose bleed for no reason. Being up in front of people when it doesn't seem normal does odd things to you.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

(((wanderer))) Saxophone, huh? That's pretty cool

Secretly secret in the secretest way...

Oh please. There ain't nothin' wrong with that. You quit being secretive about everything! :club:

 

[Peter Lorre]

Don't feel too bad DTR, you should be proud that you went out and tried.

I'm sure you'll be able to overcome the stage-fright one day and that you'll look (even more) awesome on stage!