So many beautiful people in this world...

[Chris 2]

...and I'm not one of them :club:.

I think I know where I stand when looking for a girlfriend.

sorry just wanted to make this lame thread.

 

[DayvanCowboy]

You need to really stop thinking like that. There are so many forms of beauty and if you just relax and install a little confidence in yourself someone will notice and want to spend time with you and get to know you.

Some people can also get vibes from others and if you feel good about yourself and are happy the way you are some people will notice and good things always come out of it.

I hope you feel better and I know you have the strength to feel good about yourself.

EDIT: Also, Niki (lonelyheartsxx) says whats up?

 

[Chris 2]

You need to really stop thinking like that. There are so many forms of beauty and if you just relax and install a little confidence in yourself someone will notice and want to spend time with you and get to know you.

Some people can also get vibes from others and if you feel good about yourself and are happy the way you are some people will notice and good things always come out of it.

I hope you feel better and I know you have the strength to feel good about yourself.

EDIT: Also, Niki (lonelyheartsxx) says whats up?

That just it, I don't feel good about myself. And I don't know if there any other simpler way to say that.

 

[DayvanCowboy]

You need to really stop thinking like that. There are so many forms of beauty and if you just relax and install a little confidence in yourself someone will notice and want to spend time with you and get to know you.

Some people can also get vibes from others and if you feel good about yourself and are happy the way you are some people will notice and good things always come out of it.

I hope you feel better and I know you have the strength to feel good about yourself.

EDIT: Also, Niki (lonelyheartsxx) says whats up?

That just it, I don't feel good about myself. And I don't know if there any other simpler way to say that.

There has to be a reason though. What happened exactly for you to be feeling like this? Did something so bad happen that you can't shrug it off? If someone in your life has caused this you should never ever give them the power, strength, and pleasure to make them have that effect on you.

 

[Qui]

all people are beautiful.

*edit; trolls are not people

 

[eh?]

Sounds like you are thinking only physical beauty.
If physical beauty is the most important thing, I should just quit life right now.

 

[SighX99]

there are also many "ugly" people in this world, they are doing ok. actually some of them are doing a lot better than I am.

beautiful = someone whos compatible with you, same hobby, same direction in life...etc they dont have to be handsome. just likable.

 

[Papabear]

beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Unfortunately we are the ones who have to live with the judgment of ourselves. I think there are certain aspects of me that are completely beautiful, and certain aspects that are hideous.

I think a person has to be beautiful on the inside to be truly beautiful where as physical beauty is just a measurement of how "appealing" someone is.

 

[Tramp]

You can't measure one's beauty by his/her ability to get a girlfriend. I'm sorry, that's just lame; but I think I know why you feel that way. Extended periods of loneliness coupled with loss of self esteem can often make one feel bad about himself/herself regardless of how illogical that feeling is.

I have read some of your posts here Chris, and while my situation is nowhere as bad as yours (thank God), it may be a good thing to try and hope that things will get better. Hope alone can keep people going - I know it keeps me going when I'm feeling down and lonely (like today). This may be very hard to do at times, but it is worth living in the present and finding means to keep yourself motivated when things aren't going your way.

In any case, I hope things work out for you.

 

[friendsvme]

beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Unfortunately we are the ones who have to live with the judgment of ourselves. I think there are certain aspects of me that are completely beautiful, and certain aspects that are hideous.

I think a person has to be beautiful on the inside to be truly beautiful where as physical beauty is just a measurement of how "appealing" someone is.

I guess that's the reason, why people like me would always feel that we are "not beautiful" and have very low-esteem because of that.
It's because physical beauty is always a measurement of how "appealing" someone is and it is this whether one is "appealing" or "not appealing" that people always used to judge someone. And when someone is "not appealing" people tend to avoid them... And so people like me who always get avoided will feel really bad and have very low self-esteem and hate our own looks for this reason.

 

[SunWeb]

Well, I am very ugly. How do I know it ? I was told lol. Looks I'm pretty crappy inside/outside. My thoughts were = "F**K OFF, I am what I am and I don't care what you people think of me !!!"
But time is going and I changed my views. If I don't care then people don't care either. Now I just excepted that I am realy bad person inside and outside. But I am still alive!!!! lol
Anyway looks does matter for dates. Example: 2 guys 1 girl. She must chose one stranger. So whom she wanted to go on date ? That is right, the one who has looks. And even if a girl will go out with me she would still think of another one who is much more attractive to her. And eventually go to him. Ofcourse I know about chemistry (love from first look) but then again, it worked with someone who is beautiful.

 

[SadRabbit]

Well, yeah so many beautiful people except me lol... so believe in yourself alright Chris =)

 

[Rent412]

I know it's so cliche, but I cannot express to you how much it doesn't matter to be beautiful. I am a very attractive girl and I get hit on constantly, but I am still so lonely. I still felt the need to google a message board for lonely people, despite all of the attention I may get in real life. It means NOTHING. It really does matter to be "beautiful" on the inside. I don't mean to be corny, but I'm just letting you know from a "beautiful" person's perspective. I'm upset you said you know where you stand when looking for a girlfriend. If looks are so important to you, then why do you expect it not to be important to the girls you are looking for? You need to worry about finding a girl who will like you for YOU, not your looks. Once again, from a "beautiful" person's perspective, I'd rather NOT be in my place, because it's hard to know when a guy actually likes me or just wants to get with me so he can tell all his friends because they think I'm hot. Seriously. Everybody wants what they don't have. Just be comfortable in your own skin and you will attract many girls. Nothing is sexier than confidence!

 

[Gothmother]

I look in a mirror, and see myself as ugly, overweight and odd.
My kids think im funny, pretty and i make them feel secure.
My husband loves me for me.
I suffer low esteem, and i am my own worst crit just like most of us.
There is something beautiful inside everyone, no matter how big or small
But the biggest hurdle to beauty is it has to start with liking and loving yourself first.
Hold your head up high, and say I am beautiful!
If nothing else, it will raise your self esteem.

 

[loneviking]

...and I'm not one of them :club:.

I think I know where I stand when looking for a girlfriend.

sorry just wanted to make this lame thread.

I sometimes feel the same, and the feelings are so real and intense that they drag me to the bottom of self-esteem. In theory, the phrase "beauty is inside" is true. It is true also in practice, although the media, internet, globalization, etc disguise it with tempting ideals: we tend to compare ourselves in looks to the "prettiest" people the media portrays. There are many problems with this: the first one is that what we see on TV or the internet is very superficial and does not represent the true PERSON; it represents only the exterior appearance or an object. Furthermore I can say that a very beautiful dressed person does not even represent the appearance without clothes! The difference is great. Now, if the difference between with and without clothes can be great, imagine how it can be compared to other attributes which are alien to looks, such as personality, good heart, confidence, friendship, loveliness, good companionship, trust, intelligence, etc, etc, etc.

So it is not good to compare only one attribute as we will always be at loss. Going further, it is not good to compare ourselves with anyone, period.

However, in the "reality" of this unfair world, people do not follow this reasoning and the only thing that appreciate at are looks, external looks, the looks that media says are good. External great looks are present in all cultures and different cultures interact differently with each other; the situation becomes even more complex when individuals have their own likes. The problem is that there's lots of people who like different things and there's not a rule for that: some like chocolate pie, others like apple pie, etc. We can not blame any of them.

Using reason we can further see that people have a better idea on who we are when they know our essential things; doing otherwise is not good for you or her because you base attraction in something that is only one attribute and/or something orephemeral or is just not true or right.

Again, using reason we must realize that we need the chance for other people to know us; such can be through study groups, church, clubs, friends, parties, etc. Just sitting down will not work for anyone as even the prettiest people will only be judged by the exterior and the person will be dealt accordingly. Sure, the chances of external pretiness to get someone to talk is higher but that is where average people need to make out by taking the responsibility on our hands (i.e. by being more offensive)

We are not one of the prettiest people when we look with our own eyes. We might be the prettiest people when looking with someone else's eyes. But the most secure thing to assume is that we will be the prettiest people (pie) when when someone "looks" at us with ALL the "eyes".

I'm in my 40s now and I must agree that all I say is theoretical but try to put reason as much as I can; it is something I wish I "knew" when I was younger. Something you can not get back is years, precious years. You can not get back doors not knocked at, people not talked at, opportunities not taken, risks not taken, friends lost, etc.

Fame or money or looks DO NOT GUARANTEE happiness, period. In fact, nothing in the world guarantees constant happiness in this life; we must make the best with what we have, do not assume too much, and see the world is made of all kinds of pies and there's not a rule on whom to like and whom not to like; life is wild and there is we need to tap into.

As per someone to love, just be yourself, be social and expose yourself to all kinds of people and let people know who you are.

I once had a friend who was the most beautiful woman I even met, internally and externally. Externally she was the hottest women, ever, period. But she had a very low self esteem because she said guys only wanted her because her looks and did not care on how she was inside Think about it.

I always wanted a pretty person and, despite my looks, I had a beautiful girlfriend, internally and externally; but with time, other things became more important and I did not treat her well and we split. Time passed by and see myself alone with no relationship; your age complicates things and do what you can while you are young.

Peace my friends

 

[NakitaKita]

...and I'm not one of them :club:.

I think I know where I stand when looking for a girlfriend.

sorry just wanted to make this lame thread.

I sometimes feel the same, and the feelings are so real and intense that they drag me to the bottom of self-esteem. In theory, the phrase "beauty is inside" is true. It is true also in practice, although the media, internet, globalization, etc disguise it with tempting ideals: we tend to compare ourselves in looks to the "prettiest" people the media portrays. There are many problems with this: the first one is that what we see on TV or the internet is very superficial and does not represent the true PERSON; it represents only the exterior appearance or an object. Furthermore I can say that a very beautiful dressed person does not even represent the appearance without clothes! The difference is great. Now, if the difference between with and without clothes can be great, imagine how it can be compared to other attributes which are alien to looks, such as personality, good heart, confidence, friendship, loveliness, good companionship, trust, intelligence, etc, etc, etc.

So it is not good to compare only one attribute as we will always be at loss. Going further, it is not good to compare ourselves with anyone, period.

However, in the "reality" of this unfair world, people do not follow this reasoning and the only thing that appreciate at are looks, external looks, the looks that media says are good. External great looks are present in all cultures and different cultures interact differently with each other; the situation becomes even more complex when individuals have their own likes. The problem is that there's lots of people who like different things and there's not a rule for that: some like chocolate pie, others like apple pie, etc. We can not blame any of them.

Using reason we can further see that people have a better idea on who we are when they know our essential things; doing otherwise is not good for you or her because you base attraction in something that is only one attribute and/or something orephemeral or is just not true or right.

Again, using reason we must realize that we need the chance for other people to know us; such can be through study groups, church, clubs, friends, parties, etc. Just sitting down will not work for anyone as even the prettiest people will only be judged by the exterior and the person will be dealt accordingly. Sure, the chances of external pretiness to get someone to talk is higher but that is where average people need to make out by taking the responsibility on our hands (i.e. by being more offensive)

We are not one of the prettiest people when we look with our own eyes. We might be the prettiest people when looking with someone else's eyes. But the most secure thing to assume is that we will be the prettiest people (pie) when when someone "looks" at us with ALL the "eyes".

I'm in my 40s now and I must agree that all I say is theoretical but try to put reason as much as I can; it is something I wish I "knew" when I was younger. Something you can not get back is years, precious years. You can not get back doors not knocked at, people not talked at, opportunities not taken, risks not taken, friends lost, etc.

Fame or money or looks DO NOT GUARANTEE happiness, period. In fact, nothing in the world guarantees constant happiness in this life; we must make the best with what we have, do not assume too much, and see the world is made of all kinds of pies and there's not a rule on whom to like and whom not to like; life is wild and there is we need to tap into.

As per someone to love, just be yourself, be social and expose yourself to all kinds of people and let people know who you are.

I once had a friend who was the most beautiful woman I even met, internally and externally. Externally she was the hottest women, ever, period. But she had a very low self esteem because she said guys only wanted her because her looks and did not care on how she was inside Think about it.

I always wanted a pretty person and, despite my looks, I had a beautiful girlfriend, internally and externally; but with time, other things became more important and I did not treat her well and we split. Time passed by and see myself alone with no relationship; your age complicates things and do what you can while you are young.

Peace my friends

The women you speak of ... I can see her smiling ear to ear if she saw this. It would be really really hard to deny that it made her feel anything. You might even have to tell her to quit it (smiling so much) through out the day...

Its good you see this in your relationship with her. That may have been the biggest hurddle ... anyways, with you having that in mind i'm sure things between you two can only grow from here if you allow it... where ever it may lead...no one truely knows. I can't sit here and tell you she has any clue cause she is probably on that same darn roller coaster too. But hopefully things work out.

 

[Gothmother]

Beauty is skin deep, it comes in many shapes, forms and packages.
What one person thinks is beautiful, another might find unapealing.
Others might be beautiful to look at but uglyness spoils their personality.
Someone who is plain to look at, might be considered beautiful as their personaity out shines everything else.
A wise man once told me, we are all our own worst critics.

 

[Phaedron]

Luckily I am a Gemini, with a side that both likes and dislikes everything. If I want to love someone I can easily achieve the perspective required. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all.

Morever all things are beautiful in their own ways. Even the negative has a purpose. For without pain pleasure becomes a numbing form of addiction. Also absence makes the heart grow fonder.

"What fellowship can light have with darkness?" (from the bible)

every fellowship is one of light and darkness, for either on it's own would be blinding and useless.