iwasaloverb4thiswar
Well-known member
...feel like I want to punch life in the ******* mouth, aka Sarah's 2008 Year in Review.
Jesus christ I couldn't even make it through the end of December could I?!
So, on my way to my LAST exam of the semester this morning the tread on my passenger's side front tire blew out while I was on the highway. AMAZINGLY the tire remained intact, it just managed to scare the living honeysuckle out of me and make this awful loud "wup wup wup" sound while shaking my car to bits. However, I had to pull off at the next exit (I was only a few miles from home, just having gotten on the highway) and drive back home with my hazards on. I realize now this might not have been the best course of action but I didn't have anyone to come and get me. Well I made it home fine, and I AM very lucky that nothing worse happened knowing that my car is in a progressed stage of disrepair.
This year has pretty much been a personal honeysuckle storm, so I was looking forward to the New Year with hopes that it would be a better one, but apparently 2008 was just not finished with me yet. And yes, I know what you're thinking, it could have been worse, it's just a tire, it's replaceable. You're right, however right at this moment I wish I did believe in God so I would have someone to blame, and possibly physically maim in some way.
All in all though I think I have gotten through this year without too many long term consequences, besides maybe an atrocious credit score and a slight increase in blood pressure. After all of this I have managed to keep both my health insurance and car insurance (barely), a job, my limbs, my sanity (maybe), and haven't yet been disowned or homeless.
And what has been gained? Well I think after this year I feel that I could handle almost any situation with more grace and maturity, I have learned some humility and appreciation for the people and opportunities in my life, I now understand my strengths and weaknesses, I shed some toxic relationships, strengthened/gained some good ones, now have an idea of what I might want to do for a career, and hey, even earned some college credit along the way. So that puts me at...sophomore and a half? Awesome. The four year plan is for pussies anyway.
I know for a lot of people here it is very easy to be consumed by the negative, and hell, sometimes the bad luck seems to be a custom deal; personalized just for you. However, if nothing else this year has taught me that it is important to keep your head above the water and realize that more than likely you will wake up tomorrow still intact, that no matter who you are there are people that care about you and that you and your life, your work, and your contribution are of value. Today is not your only day, you will have many more days in the future to learn new things, to meet new people, to fresia up and to redeem yourself. There is nothing wrong with taking the long (and muddy, and pot-hole strewn) road. And in the end you will be a better person for it.
To add to the cheese fest; I have three little sayings that I have found to be very very true and that I would like to share. These all have been around for awhile so most of you have probably heard them;
The first is this, for when I the tire first pops and the panic sets in. It lends itself to being repeated at an anxiety-attack pace, so it ends up sounding like a mantra:
All shall be well, all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.
And the truth is, they will be. It is important to not let fear and anxiety guide your decisions in moments of crises, just remember that you will be okay. The second is for the times when guilt and regret seem to creep in. Being someone that has made a lot of mistakes, I know how powerful those emotions can be, and how much they can affect future choices if left to run rampant over our self-esteem. Forgiveness of others, and more importantly, ourselves, is key. You can't let your past overshadow your whole future, we will all do things we regret, but that does not inhibit our capacity to do the things we can be proud of:
You can't judge a person by thier best or thier worst, one does not determine the other.
And lastly, this one kind of follows from the second (which was actually a quote from my mother, I know, gag ):
One thing can't be doubted, the "possibility of a quality" is within us. It is called prajna. We can deny everything, except that we have the possibility of being better.
That is a quote from the big man btw, and by that I mean the Dalai Lama. No matter who you are or what you have done, you have the potential to be your better self, to honor that potential.
And so the quotes kind of follow in this order; consciousness, forgiveness, and hope. Those are the things I hope to carry with me into the new year, let's see how it goes
Jesus christ I couldn't even make it through the end of December could I?!
So, on my way to my LAST exam of the semester this morning the tread on my passenger's side front tire blew out while I was on the highway. AMAZINGLY the tire remained intact, it just managed to scare the living honeysuckle out of me and make this awful loud "wup wup wup" sound while shaking my car to bits. However, I had to pull off at the next exit (I was only a few miles from home, just having gotten on the highway) and drive back home with my hazards on. I realize now this might not have been the best course of action but I didn't have anyone to come and get me. Well I made it home fine, and I AM very lucky that nothing worse happened knowing that my car is in a progressed stage of disrepair.
This year has pretty much been a personal honeysuckle storm, so I was looking forward to the New Year with hopes that it would be a better one, but apparently 2008 was just not finished with me yet. And yes, I know what you're thinking, it could have been worse, it's just a tire, it's replaceable. You're right, however right at this moment I wish I did believe in God so I would have someone to blame, and possibly physically maim in some way.
All in all though I think I have gotten through this year without too many long term consequences, besides maybe an atrocious credit score and a slight increase in blood pressure. After all of this I have managed to keep both my health insurance and car insurance (barely), a job, my limbs, my sanity (maybe), and haven't yet been disowned or homeless.
And what has been gained? Well I think after this year I feel that I could handle almost any situation with more grace and maturity, I have learned some humility and appreciation for the people and opportunities in my life, I now understand my strengths and weaknesses, I shed some toxic relationships, strengthened/gained some good ones, now have an idea of what I might want to do for a career, and hey, even earned some college credit along the way. So that puts me at...sophomore and a half? Awesome. The four year plan is for pussies anyway.
I know for a lot of people here it is very easy to be consumed by the negative, and hell, sometimes the bad luck seems to be a custom deal; personalized just for you. However, if nothing else this year has taught me that it is important to keep your head above the water and realize that more than likely you will wake up tomorrow still intact, that no matter who you are there are people that care about you and that you and your life, your work, and your contribution are of value. Today is not your only day, you will have many more days in the future to learn new things, to meet new people, to fresia up and to redeem yourself. There is nothing wrong with taking the long (and muddy, and pot-hole strewn) road. And in the end you will be a better person for it.
To add to the cheese fest; I have three little sayings that I have found to be very very true and that I would like to share. These all have been around for awhile so most of you have probably heard them;
The first is this, for when I the tire first pops and the panic sets in. It lends itself to being repeated at an anxiety-attack pace, so it ends up sounding like a mantra:
All shall be well, all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.
And the truth is, they will be. It is important to not let fear and anxiety guide your decisions in moments of crises, just remember that you will be okay. The second is for the times when guilt and regret seem to creep in. Being someone that has made a lot of mistakes, I know how powerful those emotions can be, and how much they can affect future choices if left to run rampant over our self-esteem. Forgiveness of others, and more importantly, ourselves, is key. You can't let your past overshadow your whole future, we will all do things we regret, but that does not inhibit our capacity to do the things we can be proud of:
You can't judge a person by thier best or thier worst, one does not determine the other.
And lastly, this one kind of follows from the second (which was actually a quote from my mother, I know, gag ):
One thing can't be doubted, the "possibility of a quality" is within us. It is called prajna. We can deny everything, except that we have the possibility of being better.
That is a quote from the big man btw, and by that I mean the Dalai Lama. No matter who you are or what you have done, you have the potential to be your better self, to honor that potential.
And so the quotes kind of follow in this order; consciousness, forgiveness, and hope. Those are the things I hope to carry with me into the new year, let's see how it goes