Things You Miss

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I miss living where I grew up, where all my friends and family are. I miss my first apartment with the great window seat and the lady down the hall who was always cooking things that smelled good. I miss my dog. I miss who I use to be.
 
Being able to win a decent amount of money on scratch tickets. 10-15 years ago, you would often win free tickets and
a fair amount of $5 to $10 winners. Now you are lucky if you even get a free ticket! I would have a better chance of beating Michael Jordan in a game of 1-on-1 than winning $10 these days.
 
Veruca said:
Walking. Its too dangerous to be walking around alone here now.

Bears coming out of hibernation has that effect :p My solution- take a friend that's slower than you. Or trip them if they're faster.
 
Brilliant idea. Will also secretly stuff aromatic foods in friends pockets. Thanks wildernesswildchild! :D
 
At the moment, I am feeling very sad and depressed about having done absolutely nothing worthwhile since I finished high school. I have gone to looking up some fellow students and deeply feel so disappointed with myself that I have not done a single thing since then... and they all have lived a thousand lifetimes since then. We're the same age. It has gotten me arguably the most depressed I have ever been. It will hopefully be a very positive thing, realising how totally miserable and meaningless my entire existence has been, so that I can finally start living a meaningful life.

I will never get back my high school years. That is a very sad thing to realise. However, there is still a glimmer of hope left to be able to make up for the many, many missed years since then. There has got to be hope. I am not a suicidal person and I in no way encourage that sort of thing. However, for one of the very few times ever in my life, I did question whether I would ever be able to make up for wasting my entire life. It is such a big thing that it seems almost impossible to do that and I questioned whether life is worth living if I can't break out of this and move forward. I hope that it is... we make our own destiny. There has got to be more to life than this! There must be a way out of this! There just must be... I just can't envision living such a sad life for too much longer. Again, I am not encouraging suicide in any way.

There is no way to get back what I lost. I look back on some memories fondly. There is a person from high school who has gone on to do wonderful things. Lived a meaningful life and been a very hard worker. Fighting to lead a good life. Struggling and never giving up. We were in the same group at school but I doubt we said much to eachother. However, I want to tell that person how proud I am of them. It really makes me so proud to see where they have come since high school. I really love that and they seem like a wonderful person. Would they treat me like everyone else and be negative towards me? Perhaps they would... but I look at them and I just am so happy for them. They have done everything that I have never done. They have lived and are living a meaningful existence.
 
Since yesterday, I miss the two birds who I live with and very fond of. They both died suddenly.

They were very sweet. Thier owners mostly neglected them, but I visited them often, so they really liked me. Recently they came to singing when any time they heard my voice.

The one was very friendly, he hopped on my shoulder soon as I opened the cage. Other one was a little shy, it was clear to see he really wanted to but from start but keeped going around different parts on the cage, because he hesitated how to jump on me, but when he did, he decided the best spot was right on top my head.

They both were really cute personalities. they had kind of.. a song and dance routine, would do a routine of whistling of imitations of out-side birds, and would run back and forth and bob their heads at certain parts of it. Some times they did on in my shoulder. The sound was so loud in my ear it hurt, but they were adorable, so it could not be helped.

Crying again. :( I have no idea why they died. Really miss them already.
 
Stable family relationships.

And I'm 23, so I'm still pretty young...but my best memories aren't centered around high school or even college, they're all centered around like, elementary school. I'd give anything to be that innocent again.
 
Netflix
Gold
Alibi
Syfy

The pictures my parents threw away before I had a chance to use them in photos :(

The boys

Oh and you! :p
 
the countryside! laying on the grass under the trees, the silence, the many stars
some few soul mates that blessed me for a little while
the family I never had
my cat DollFace, who would now be 21 years old, and any other feline in my life

but, yeah, I try and concentrate on the present
 
I just lost a friendship, so I'm missing that friend. They were flawed, but so am I, and I judged them too harshly. I regret it so much, but the damage cannot be undone. I have learned a lot from this experience. It's a shame I've made the same mistakes before, but never again!
 
Five things I miss, eh? I honestly can't just pull things I miss out of thin air like that, so I'll have to have a sit and think about it. Hm..

1. Going to have to be the enjoyable not-a-care-in-the-world times when I was in my early teens, being able to eat and drink so much junk food, not care about the time of day, sit around indoors with a friend or two and just play the hell out of the latest fun video game that was going. Nowdays I'm largely a solo gamer, and the times when I could sit down in the same room with a pile of snacks, and a small pile of people, for over 24 hours at a time just playing the same game are gone. I do miss it, sometimes..the two friends I've managed to keep play with me sometimes on Xbox Live, but it's a rare occurance and never lasts for more than a few hours. Also aside from that, we don't have many 3 player games we can play and enjoy at the same time.

2. Decent, well meaning cartoons. Any UK's remember Funny Bones, Spider in the Bath, or perhaps PlayBus? Now it seems tiny toddlers are reduced to watching pretty colours, stupid stories and general brain-mushing bullshit. I remember learning how to write thanks to...it might of been PlayBus, the orange pencil with the light in the end, writing letters. UP AND DOWN AND UP AND ROUND AND FLICK! Can't remember what letter that was, but it stuck when I was small. I don't think anything sticks these days, with toddlers, I mean. It's probably why I believe all kids are just looking for trouble and need to be blasted now, though.

3. Sunny D. I guess when I was small I grew up with at least one bottle in the house...it had meaning then, even if it was full of evil chemicals..it was delicious, thick, and full of vitamins...looked nice too. Family used to buy the big bottles for general household use and a large pack of the small cylindrical shaped bottles for school. Was awesome. Sunny D is just watery orange swill now, not fit for washing between my toes with, let alone drinking.

3a. Turkey Twizzlers. ****, they were tasty, if unhealthy. How can they remove these from shelves but not stop companies shelving extremely cheap foodstuffs that comprise of about 10% of the nutritional value the meal should have...and still call it healthy? **** memories.

4. Possibly just going school. I tended to know the answer to everything, but I wasn't a know it all..never raised my hand despite knowing the answer, anyway. Crowds have that kind of effect. Was just a nice bit of relaxation, having a routine, filling a book with your mind and how your mind perceived things, and was excellent closure for the end of the day, knowing you've vented the slowly building up young creative frustration you get, so yeah, without that now and little to no routine for me these days, I rarely get the sense of closure I used to.

5. Possibly my childhood toy, a Beanie Snake, who my Dad foolishly gave away to my step-sisters snotty nosed ungrateful piece of honeysuckle kid. I saw it the other day actually, it now has most of the inner fluff crushed and pushed into its tail with the rest of the snake being limp, the tongue has been ripped out leaving a little piece of frayed felt, and one of its eyes are missing. I hate kids. Wish I was born a teen.
 
painter said:
My ex. Miss her like crazy today. Taking a lot of will power not to message her.

:(

You'll manage man. Just fill your mind with the reasons why it didn't work on her side (instead of yours) and try not to get enveloped in the potential calf love thing if you have - that typical I'M LOST WITHOUT YOU/NOTHING WITHOUT YOU thing that happens during most relationships.

Also things get easier with time. I know that's a pretty standard, lame form of encouragement with things like this but it does get easier with time. So fill your day with time speeding activities, or smash all the clocks in your house or something.

Also, sadness. I feel for you :( but you've probably got your own hands anyway.
 

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