This girl...

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Xpendable said:
Paraiyar said:
Bullshit, you aren't too old. Your entire mentality is just set up to sell yourself short of what would mske yourself happy. I m different to most people as well but I'm damned well fighting to find a way to develop myself where I can be true to myself and still get what I want.

I'm being true to myself. This is how I am.

Paraiyar said:
You aren't happy the way you are and maybe you would be if you could just approach this girl and see where it goes? Seriously, what do you really have to lose from it?

I'm happy for who I am, I'm not happy because of the way other people treat me for being the way I am.

I could lose:
- Her trust.
- Her friendship.
- The confidence to talk to her again.
- Confidence in general.
- I would lose the commodity of comunicating naturally with her.
- Respect from others, since this would inevitably come to everyone's ears.
- The chance to make myself more attractive to her if I wait more time.
- The chance to be loved.

So it's everyone else's fault? Seriously? Everyone has to take these risks when they like someone, why should it be different for you?
 
Xpendable said:
I've always said I'm the one who's not saying anything. I don't know where I said otherwise.


As has been said, she may expect you to make the first move. Maybe she has confidence issues of her own.
 
Hey Xpendable, I don't know what your issue is at this point, so what sort of advice do you want to hear? What do you want to hear from us?
 
Paraiyar said:
Xpendable said:
Paraiyar said:
Bullshit, you aren't too old. Your entire mentality is just set up to sell yourself short of what would mske yourself happy. I m different to most people as well but I'm damned well fighting to find a way to develop myself where I can be true to myself and still get what I want.

I'm being true to myself. This is how I am.

Paraiyar said:
You aren't happy the way you are and maybe you would be if you could just approach this girl and see where it goes? Seriously, what do you really have to lose from it?

I'm happy for who I am, I'm not happy because of the way other people treat me for being the way I am.

I could lose:
- Her trust.
- Her friendship.
- The confidence to talk to her again.
- Confidence in general.
- I would lose the commodity of comunicating naturally with her.
- Respect from others, since this would inevitably come to everyone's ears.
- The chance to make myself more attractive to her if I wait more time.
- The chance to be loved.

So it's everyone else's fault? Seriously? Everyone has to take these risks when they like someone, why should it be different for you?

Because I don't get as many shots as most people. And I'm taking the risk, but I'm being more careful.


Paraiyar said:
As has been said, she may expect you to make the first move. Maybe she has confidence issues of her own.

Well I have them too, why I don't get any understanding? No one is preassuring her.

Hey Xpendable, I don't know what your issue is at this point, so what sort of advice do you want to hear? What do you want to hear from us?

I'm not demanding anything. Just some advices on how to advance things slowly. How to talk or what to say to her without being too agressive.
 
Xpendable said:
Hey Xpendable, I don't know what your issue is at this point, so what sort of advice do you want to hear? What do you want to hear from us?

I'm not demanding anything. Just some advices on how to advance things slowly. How to talk or what to say to her without being too agressive.

You know, I've actually dealt before with the type of girl you're describing, 2 of them actually, so I can understand how you wouldn't want to screw things up with her, I managed to befriend both though. One of them was during my time in High School and the other one during my time in College, both also liked anime and drawing, since both topics were a particular interest of mine, how could I not take the chance of talking to them?
I gotta say, being with them was not easy, I know about those two things, yes, but they were almost obsessed with them, to the point that I would learn things about anime and drawings, things that I had never heard of before. I had mixed feelings while I spent time with them, there were many points where I just wanted to leave them and others were I wanted to be with them for the rest of the day, we were only school friends though, we couldn't be actual friends for various reasons (they include my parents).
I'll tell you right now, if you're the type of person that doesn't enjoy doing the same thing over and over from a very limited amount of hobbies, you're going to end up HATING this girl, but if you're a patient man, then one way you can do things to advance slowly and without being too aggressive is to just spend time with her in the things SHE likes. I understand those kinds of girls, because they're a bit like me, it's very intimidating to try out new things. If you watch anime and draw alongside her, she'll slowly like you as a friend, becoming a couple however is going to be far more complicated. The stuff you heard about breaking the touch barrier or acting confidently doesn't apply here, you just need to make her feel like she's enjoying your company, you'll be able to see this with the way she behaves, her trying out stuff that you like is a good example.
Here's another thing though, one universal fact about getting into a relationship is that you CANNOT take things too slowly, if neither of you are bold enough to ask each other out, then the both of you will think that all you want from each other is a friendly relationship, instead of a romantic one. Unless if you're rich or have a killer body, it's very rare for women to make the first move, and if you're intimidated to advance things into the next level, just go old-school and send her a letter.
What's the worst case scenario that could occur? Saying that she's not interested in being your girlfriend. That's it, it's really not that big of a deal, as long as you don't screw up like I did, I asked the High School one if we could be a couple, IN PERSON mind you, I got rejected, got angry, walked off and never talked to her again; the whole friendship was destroyed. Also, I'm not an emotional person, I even lack sympathy for people, so you need to keep your cool in case that happens, if you walk off when you get rejected after spending time with her for a while, that's a way of saying that you just wanted a one-night stand.
Point is, if you want to befriend her, then I hope my tips help, but if you do want to become her boyfriend, you just need to be patient. Judging by your posts, it seems like you want her now, if that's the case, you can either be patient or just send her a letter, see what she thinks and be done with it. Don't go insane for reasons that aren't that big of a deal, you're 28, you still have time and there are many, MANY women out there, heck, I think you chances of getting a lifetime partner are much higher than some other members from here, including me.
That's all I'll say for now, it's now up to you to decide how things will go.

P.S.

I haven't been following this thread that much and I've never been in a relationship, so if I got some things wrong in post, everyone's welcome to f*ck me up.
 
Xpendable said:
No. You see, the point of this is to adquire the maximum amount of information by not providing any statement or literal speech about the issue. It has to be a instance in which we both know what we think about each other without never admiting anything or declaring something like that. I hate to say it but it's finally a power struggle and the one who talks first loses. I see it like this, no asking anything like that until one is perfectly certain that the feelings are reciprocate; otherwise is like jumping into a dark abyss with your eyes closed.

Xpendable said:
If I had this life where I couldn't love someone and just use girls I guess I could just get rejected and pass to the next one. But I can't love someone so easily, I can't just shake it off because there's no one else to focus on. I don't love this girl, but I think I could if I know her better, but I can't afford to look vulnerable because I don't know how she would take it.

I can relate; leaving things unsaid allows one to continue holding out hope, but if she hasn't shown any signs of interest by now this is the only way you will stand out.

Xpendable said:
I could lose:
- Her trust.
- Her friendship.

That's possible, but there's nothing you can do to stop that whether you ask now or in 6 months.

AnonymousMe's post +1 here. If you get rejected, don't react bitterly, doing so will make this a certainty. It generally comes across better if you show interest sooner rather than later. It seems like you already know each other well enough.

Xpendable said:
- The chance to make myself more attractive to her if I wait more time.

I also think this is very unlikely. As said, you've already interacted enough for her to have established feelings towards you.
 
Xpendable said:
Paraiyar said:
Xpendable said:
Paraiyar said:
Bullshit, you aren't too old. Your entire mentality is just set up to sell yourself short of what would mske yourself happy. I m different to most people as well but I'm damned well fighting to find a way to develop myself where I can be true to myself and still get what I want.

I'm being true to myself. This is how I am.

Paraiyar said:
You aren't happy the way you are and maybe you would be if you could just approach this girl and see where it goes? Seriously, what do you really have to lose from it?

I'm happy for who I am, I'm not happy because of the way other people treat me for being the way I am.

I could lose:
- Her trust.
- Her friendship.
- The confidence to talk to her again.
- Confidence in general.
- I would lose the commodity of comunicating naturally with her.
- Respect from others, since this would inevitably come to everyone's ears.
- The chance to make myself more attractive to her if I wait more time.
- The chance to be loved.

So it's everyone else's fault? Seriously? Everyone has to take these risks when they like someone, why should it be different for you?

Because I don't get as many shots as most people. And I'm taking the risk, but I'm being more careful.


Paraiyar said:
As has been said, she may expect you to make the first move. Maybe she has confidence issues of her own.

Well I have them too, why I don't get any understanding? No one is preassuring her.

Hey Xpendable, I don't know what your issue is at this point, so what sort of advice do you want to hear? What do you want to hear from us?

I'm not demanding anything. Just some advices on how to advance things slowly. How to talk or what to say to her without being too agressive.

Well it's more frequent for men to make the move when it comes to courtship. You can complain about that and view it as unfair but you can't change it so I think it's better to make the most of the cards you have been dealt.

I've seen photos of you and there is nothing wrong with your looks so maybe the fact you feel you don't get as many shots as other people is down to the fact you aren't putting yourself in a position to have them
 
I know I said I was going to forget this but after looking over the thread, I think I'm going to say something else: you have this mentality that you are different and that things will only work a certain way for you and that s that. I think you need to adopt a mentality where you believe that you can change and adapt over time in order to be able to work with nature rather than against it which is what you seem to be doing right now. Having such a fixed view of what you can and can't do is just going to hold you back.
 
Xpendable said:
Well I have them too, why I don't get any understanding? No one is preassuring her.

Where is your understanding?
You posted this thread for advice, you take none of the advice given to you, only making excuse after excuse as to why you can't do this or that. You blame others for your problems, taking none of the responsibility on yourself.
You have indicated that you like this girl and refuse to do anything about it. You had understanding at the start of this thread, but after all the excuses you've made, you lost that.
I don't really think that cultural differences matter in the slightest here. No one will ever know that someone likes them unless they say so. End of story. If you like her, tell her. If you want to be in a relationship with her, tell her.
 
TheRealCallie said:
Xpendable said:
Well I have them too, why I don't get any understanding? No one is preassuring her.

Where is your understanding?
You posted this thread for advice, you take none of the advice given to you, only making excuse after excuse as to why you can't do this or that. You blame others for your problems, taking none of the responsibility on yourself.
You have indicated that you like this girl and refuse to do anything about it. You had understanding at the start of this thread, but after all the excuses you've made, you lost that.
I don't really think that cultural differences matter in the slightest here. No one will ever know that someone likes them unless they say so. End of story. If you like her, tell her. If you want to be in a relationship with her, tell her.

I'm doing it at my own pace.
 
AnonymousMe said:
You know, I've actually dealt before with the type of girl you're describing, 2 of them actually, so I can understand how you wouldn't want to screw things up with her, I managed to befriend both though. One of them was during my time in High School and the other one during my time in College, both also liked anime and drawing, since both topics were a particular interest of mine, how could I not take the chance of talking to them?
I gotta say, being with them was not easy, I know about those two things, yes, but they were almost obsessed with them, to the point that I would learn things about anime and drawings, things that I had never heard of before. I had mixed feelings while I spent time with them, there were many points where I just wanted to leave them and others were I wanted to be with them for the rest of the day, we were only school friends though, we couldn't be actual friends for various reasons (they include my parents).
I'll tell you right now, if you're the type of person that doesn't enjoy doing the same thing over and over from a very limited amount of hobbies, you're going to end up HATING this girl, but if you're a patient man, then one way you can do things to advance slowly and without being too aggressive is to just spend time with her in the things SHE likes. I understand those kinds of girls, because they're a bit like me, it's very intimidating to try out new things. If you watch anime and draw alongside her, she'll slowly like you as a friend, becoming a couple however is going to be far more complicated. The stuff you heard about breaking the touch barrier or acting confidently doesn't apply here, you just need to make her feel like she's enjoying your company, you'll be able to see this with the way she behaves, her trying out stuff that you like is a good example.
Here's another thing though, one universal fact about getting into a relationship is that you CANNOT take things too slowly, if neither of you are bold enough to ask each other out, then the both of you will think that all you want from each other is a friendly relationship, instead of a romantic one. Unless if you're rich or have a killer body, it's very rare for women to make the first move, and if you're intimidated to advance things into the next level, just go old-school and send her a letter.
What's the worst case scenario that could occur? Saying that she's not interested in being your girlfriend. That's it, it's really not that big of a deal, as long as you don't screw up like I did, I asked the High School one if we could be a couple, IN PERSON mind you, I got rejected, got angry, walked off and never talked to her again; the whole friendship was destroyed. Also, I'm not an emotional person, I even lack sympathy for people, so you need to keep your cool in case that happens, if you walk off when you get rejected after spending time with her for a while, that's a way of saying that you just wanted a one-night stand.
Point is, if you want to befriend her, then I hope my tips help, but if you do want to become her boyfriend, you just need to be patient. Judging by your posts, it seems like you want her now, if that's the case, you can either be patient or just send her a letter, see what she thinks and be done with it. Don't go insane for reasons that aren't that big of a deal, you're 28, you still have time and there are many, MANY women out there, heck, I think you chances of getting a lifetime partner are much higher than some other members from here, including me.
That's all I'll say for now, it's now up to you to decide how things will go.

:)

Wow, thanks for taking the time. I appreciate the details about your experience. I know about this anime girls and she's a lot like that. I watch anime in a casual way, but I also can draw. Plus she's also a good singer and makes music like me, not like singing with a guitar but actual score composing. You have a girl that sings, draws, makes music and writes; who's also pretty and has a refreshing sense of humor. You say there's many girls out there, well I've never meet someone like that, ever. She said herself we had things in common and I want to embrace that. The problem with the social concensus is that you have to do things in ONE way and not to deviate from it. My problem with this mentality is that is too unsafe. It's needesly risky to struck the conversation with "hey, I like you, do you like me to?" to someone who barely knows you. It's like asking for marriage on the first date, but somehow I'm a fool for not exposing myself to a high probability of failure. It's sad to me to realize she doesn't like me. She's doesn't like me now and probably won't like me any time in the future if I failed to attract her in this months. A woman knows when she likes a man in the first 10 minutes and to change that it's almost impossible. I will still try to get closer to her and that she knows me for what I am, just my true self and she can decide if I'm good enough or not. Maybe I'm a pathetic person and I deserve this like people here say, but I'm far for being bad; I'm far of not deserving love. I'm taking this shot like a life or death situation because it is. Not literal death but my hope to care for a person who's not common like everyone else, a person that can teach me stuff and actually challenge my views. But I guess I'm a coward for not treating it like a slice of life situation, I guess that conforming to a standard of people and settle for the first thing that comes along is not being a coward. That's just following nature.
 
Xpendable said:
TheRealCallie said:
Xpendable said:
Well I have them too, why I don't get any understanding? No one is preassuring her.

Where is your understanding?
You posted this thread for advice, you take none of the advice given to you, only making excuse after excuse as to why you can't do this or that. You blame others for your problems, taking none of the responsibility on yourself.
You have indicated that you like this girl and refuse to do anything about it. You had understanding at the start of this thread, but after all the excuses you've made, you lost that.
I don't really think that cultural differences matter in the slightest here. No one will ever know that someone likes them unless they say so. End of story. If you like her, tell her. If you want to be in a relationship with her, tell her.

I'm doing it at my own pace.


Well then, when someone comes along and asks her out and she then has a boyfriend and you aren't even in the running anymore, I guess you'll just have yourself to blame.
 
Xpendable said:
Wow, thanks for taking the time. I appreciate the details about your experience. I know about this anime girls and she's a lot like that. I watch anime in a casual way, but I also can draw. Plus she's also a good singer and makes music like me, not like singing with a guitar but actual score composing. You have a girl that sings, draws, makes music and writes; who's also pretty and has a refreshing sense of humor.

Xpendable said:
You say there's many girls out there, well I've never meet someone like that, ever. She said herself we had things in common and I want to embrace that. The problem with the social concensus is that you have to do things in ONE way and not to deviate from it. My problem with this mentality is that is too unsafe. It's needesly risky to struck the conversation with "hey, I like you, do you like me to?" to someone who barely knows you. It's like asking for marriage on the first date, but somehow I'm a fool for not exposing myself to a high probability of failure.

Xpendable said:
It's sad to me to realize she doesn't like me. She's doesn't like me now and probably won't like me any time in the future if I failed to attract her in this months.

Like everyone's been saying, if the both of you have things in common, then why don't you just ask her out? And you know what? F*ck the social consensus, you'd be surprised to see how many people get into a relationship when NOT following the rules, it may be hard to believe, but many relationships that start when people meet, girls usually like guys that approach them, flirt with them and let them know that he's a type of guy that takes no BS from anyone and gets what he wants. Your case is not that extreme, since you don't have the guts to ask her out, all you have to do is send her a letter, if you've been with her for some months now, it's obvious that she's not going to make the first move now, that doesn't mean that she doesn't like you, even if the both of you barely know each other like you say. Again, it's not going to be that big of a deal if you get rejected unless if you make it a big deal, when I said that there are many women out there, I meant it generally, the type of girl you're dealing with are often inside their house doing what they like, it's rare to see them outside, except during events they're linked to their hobbies.
This will be the last thing I say, so don't expect me to reply anymore. What you're doing to yourself in unhealthy, you're driving yourself nuts over something that shouldn't be so complicated, this mentality of yours needs to stop. Just send her that letter and you decide what to do depending on what she answers, if she accepts, then that's good, if she rejects, then just stay as friends and wait until another girl that could have the potential of being your girlfriend pops up, all while returning to your normal life again.
 
Xpendable said:
I've been interacting with this girl from where I study some time ago. All very casual, we're not close or even friends. Being LS I can't imagine approaching too much or pushing myself to catch her attention, specially since I fear being too clingy or awkward. I think I have a crush on her that has been growing. I notice she was different from the start, she is in 3rd year and I'm on 2nd but I'm about 6 years older. She has this weird sense of humor and some specific hobbies. I was initially interested but now I'm kinda hooked, she's also pretty -a 6 or a 7- (I use the rating system to describe, don't judge me), but I've never had the courage (obviously) to be closer to her. One day my classmates said I should "bang her" or whatever meaning this translates from my language. They said she was probably a virgin and could tell in a way I couldn't. I don't know if that is true but it seems it is. In the 18 months I've know her I've never seen her with a guy; romantically at least. This is a girl that 9 out of 10 times would have a boyfriend but it seems there's no guy behind her. My theory is that she has some kind of social disfunction. She acts weird sometimes and that can repel some men I guess. She's into anime and that obscure corner called Yaoi. I personally don't care about that but I can see why other men find it weird. Even other girls sometimes feel unconfortable around her. She's more awkward that many men and many times off-putting.

I got to play in one of her songs one time and I was able to get her whatsapp without asking :) We talk sometimes since then but I'm always concious of not pushing too hard or coming as desperate. I always think what I type and I'm concerned of not screwing up with some stupid comment. The problem is she's kinda reclusive and sometimes hard to find. The other day I noticed it was her birthday but she didn't had her facebook activated for it, so only her family and close friends remembered. I thought this was some kind of way of staying in the dark with regards to people. She doesn't like facebook or any other type of social media and barely uses any of those sites. She also stays at home more than the average girl and hates going to parties or socialize too much. I've heard this from her classmates and makes really hard to know what she's doing or thinking.

Anyway, we just talk a couple of hours from know and she send me a picture of her room wall. She has this art and frames in an artistic way. I was surprised of someone seending something so personal to a person they barely know. You would think girls are very reluctant to share anything with some guy that could be a creep. Maybe she's that innocent or maybe she just trust me. I don't know. I'm really tempted to take this as my first serious shot, I really think I have a chance here but the bad part is that I can read her, I can't know what she's thinking or how she would react to certain things. I have no idea how her mind opperates and I'm really afraid of being rejected by someone I have to see every day at least for 2 more years. She's like this werid jewel that somehow most guys are too "normal" to engage with. And she's just standing there with no visible obstacle. I feel she has some circle of friends out of UNI with her weird tates but she barely post anything of FB, so is all mystery.

Well, I just wanted to get this out of my chest. I don't know how to handle this but I only have to keep investigating until is too late. Anyone who has some tip or theory about this; I'll be glad to hear it.

(Sorry for the spelling and grammar)

Hey X,
I haven't read through the thread - I'm curious, did you take the plunge and speak to this girl that you're interested in? Will you?
 
Xpendable said:
AnonymousMe said:
You know, I've actually dealt before with the type of girl you're describing, 2 of them actually, so I can understand how you wouldn't want to screw things up with her, I managed to befriend both though. One of them was during my time in High School and the other one during my time in College, both also liked anime and drawing, since both topics were a particular interest of mine, how could I not take the chance of talking to them?
I gotta say, being with them was not easy, I know about those two things, yes, but they were almost obsessed with them, to the point that I would learn things about anime and drawings, things that I had never heard of before. I had mixed feelings while I spent time with them, there were many points where I just wanted to leave them and others were I wanted to be with them for the rest of the day, we were only school friends though, we couldn't be actual friends for various reasons (they include my parents).
I'll tell you right now, if you're the type of person that doesn't enjoy doing the same thing over and over from a very limited amount of hobbies, you're going to end up HATING this girl, but if you're a patient man, then one way you can do things to advance slowly and without being too aggressive is to just spend time with her in the things SHE likes. I understand those kinds of girls, because they're a bit like me, it's very intimidating to try out new things. If you watch anime and draw alongside her, she'll slowly like you as a friend, becoming a couple however is going to be far more complicated. The stuff you heard about breaking the touch barrier or acting confidently doesn't apply here, you just need to make her feel like she's enjoying your company, you'll be able to see this with the way she behaves, her trying out stuff that you like is a good example.
Here's another thing though, one universal fact about getting into a relationship is that you CANNOT take things too slowly, if neither of you are bold enough to ask each other out, then the both of you will think that all you want from each other is a friendly relationship, instead of a romantic one. Unless if you're rich or have a killer body, it's very rare for women to make the first move, and if you're intimidated to advance things into the next level, just go old-school and send her a letter.
What's the worst case scenario that could occur? Saying that she's not interested in being your girlfriend. That's it, it's really not that big of a deal, as long as you don't screw up like I did, I asked the High School one if we could be a couple, IN PERSON mind you, I got rejected, got angry, walked off and never talked to her again; the whole friendship was destroyed. Also, I'm not an emotional person, I even lack sympathy for people, so you need to keep your cool in case that happens, if you walk off when you get rejected after spending time with her for a while, that's a way of saying that you just wanted a one-night stand.
Point is, if you want to befriend her, then I hope my tips help, but if you do want to become her boyfriend, you just need to be patient. Judging by your posts, it seems like you want her now, if that's the case, you can either be patient or just send her a letter, see what she thinks and be done with it. Don't go insane for reasons that aren't that big of a deal, you're 28, you still have time and there are many, MANY women out there, heck, I think you chances of getting a lifetime partner are much higher than some other members from here, including me.
That's all I'll say for now, it's now up to you to decide how things will go.

:)

Wow, thanks for taking the time. I appreciate the details about your experience. I know about this anime girls and she's a lot like that. I watch anime in a casual way, but I also can draw. Plus she's also a good singer and makes music like me, not like singing with a guitar but actual score composing. You have a girl that sings, draws, makes music and writes; who's also pretty and has a refreshing sense of humor. You say there's many girls out there, well I've never meet someone like that, ever. She said herself we had things in common and I want to embrace that. The problem with the social concensus is that you have to do things in ONE way and not to deviate from it. My problem with this mentality is that is too unsafe. It's needesly risky to struck the conversation with "hey, I like you, do you like me to?" to someone who barely knows you. It's like asking for marriage on the first date, but somehow I'm a fool for not exposing myself to a high probability of failure. It's sad to me to realize she doesn't like me. She's doesn't like me now and probably won't like me any time in the future if I failed to attract her in this months. A woman knows when she likes a man in the first 10 minutes and to change that it's almost impossible. I will still try to get closer to her and that she knows me for what I am, just my true self and she can decide if I'm good enough or not. Maybe I'm a pathetic person and I deserve this like people here say, but I'm far for being bad; I'm far of not deserving love. I'm taking this shot like a life or death situation because it is. Not literal death but my hope to care for a person who's not common like everyone else, a person that can teach me stuff and actually challenge my views. But I guess I'm a coward for not treating it like a slice of life situation, I guess that conforming to a standard of people and settle for the first thing that comes along is not being a coward. That's just following nature.

If a woman knows within the first ten minutes then why bother taking months to ask her? Go ahead and do it.
 
Talking about the "next girl" doesn't really help. Sure the way society is people who take a scattershot approach to finding someone are going to be more successful, but that's just not going to register with someone who's hung up on one person.

There's no point in sugar coating it, in these circumstances rejection will likely hurt a lot.

Even more reason to get this over with soon.
 
Xpendable said:
Paraiyar said:
Bullshit, you aren't too old. Your entire mentality is just set up to sell yourself short of what would mske yourself happy. I m different to most people as well but I'm damned well fighting to find a way to develop myself where I can be true to myself and still get what I want.

I'm being true to myself. This is how I am.

Paraiyar said:
You aren't happy the way you are and maybe you would be if you could just approach this girl and see where it goes? Seriously, what do you really have to lose from it?

I'm happy for who I am, I'm not happy because of the way other people treat me for being the way I am.

I could lose:
- Her trust.
- Her friendship.
- The confidence to talk to her again.
- Confidence in general.
- I would lose the commodity of comunicating naturally with her.
- Respect from others, since this would inevitably come to everyone's ears.
- The chance to make myself more attractive to her if I wait more time.
- The chance to be loved.

Hey man, how's it going? "I'm happy for who I am" <--- this right here, is amazing. A fair amount of people are not happy about who they are. You've expressed a lot of consequences of what might happen if you were to push her away by expressing how you feel. I imagine the stakes are immensely high. Probably so high that it may give you a great deal of anxiety, worry, or maybe even a sense of remorse about not being able to summon the courage to ask her out. What if all that could go away? I'm not saying you should simply be blunt and ask her how she feels. Could you? might possibly work, but that's a very tall order. I can't give you a cheat code to get in. You need for her to notice you more, you need to involve yourself into her life, and you need to stop beating yourself up. How to do this? think hard about it. Think what could I do to involve myself with her more. When you are more familiar with her go for it. Don't do this at a snail's pace, man it's only going to cause more grief for yourself. I promise you, if this girl demonstrates the same feelings that you do; you will feel on top of the world. All that anxiety, remorse, worry gone within a flash. You might do a little dance. I would think it's worth the risk. You will decide for yourself man, I just hope you don't live in regret. Good Luck.
 
Texas said:
Hey man, how's it going? "I'm happy for who I am" <--- this right here, is amazing. A fair amount of people are not happy about who they are. You've expressed a lot of consequences of what might happen if you were to push her away by expressing how you feel. I imagine the stakes are immensely high. Probably so high that it may give you a great deal of anxiety, worry, or maybe even a sense of remorse about not being able to summon the courage to ask her out. What if all that could go away? I'm not saying you should simply be blunt and ask her how she feels. Could you? might possibly work, but that's a very tall order. I can't give you a cheat code to get in. You need for her to notice you more, you need to involve yourself into her life, and you need to stop beating yourself up. How to do this? think hard about it. Think what could I do to involve myself with her more. When you are more familiar with her go for it. Don't do this at a snail's pace, man it's only going to cause more grief for yourself. I promise you, if this girl demonstrates the same feelings that you do; you will feel on top of the world. All that anxiety, remorse, worry gone within a flash. You might do a little dance. I would think it's worth the risk. You will decide for yourself man, I just hope you don't live in regret. Good Luck.


Thanks a lot. Of course I don't like everything about me, but still I won't change my personality for being more popular or "normal". I resent the fact that being like this is not very good for my own happiness, but it's an honest position. Sometimes happiness means you have to ignore many things in life, or not to think too much about anything. Ignorance is bliss. I'm currently letting things go normaly for me and her. Today I saw her, she passed next to me and say hi really quick and went class because she was late. It was very cold and impersonal. I have many things to worry about now, specially my studies. I don't know, sometimes (like people say here), I'm thinking too much about this. Probably it's all in my head and she barely remembers me or considers me. I don't want to be making all this up in my head, haven't been able to talk to her again and never caught her online. I?m thinking in giving this a rest for a while. I?m stressing myself for nothing.
 

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