What you guys should really do before any girl...

[IgnoredOne]

Get a car. Seriously. Get a car with your own money, and maintain it. If you cannot have the responsibility to afford, pay for and maintain a vehicle, then you are no absolutely no position to get into a long-term relationship with a woman.

And yes, this means that you should have a job.

A friend of mine, very conservative, old-fashioned and good old Georgian boy,once told me this adage: "First the job, then the car, and then the girl." There's more truth in it than you realize at first.

 

[Rolo]

And what about the women? Surely they should have certain "must haves" as well?

 

[IgnoredOne]

And what about the women? Surely they should have certain "must haves" as well?

Hell if I know, I'm not a girl. I'll let some woman decide on what they need. I'm already practicing the hell out of my Ego skill by claiming that I know what I think guys need, I'm not about to spout pseudobooblets and dictate women too.

 

[Pheenix]

Lift weights, get big, get cool car, fresia chicks, aye?

I was personally planning to see if I could get by with a bike and public trans[/code]port (there's a lot of it where I live). I don't have an environmental high horse, but I wouldn't mind. An I am wondering, how many vegan-hippie chicks would that recuperate as a substitute?

 

[IgnoredOne]

Lift weights, get big, get cool car, fresia chicks, aye?

I was personally planning to see if I could get by with a bike and public trans[/code]port (there's a lot of it where I live). I don't have an environmental high horse, but I wouldn't mind. An I am wondering, how many vegan-hippie chicks would that recuperate as a substitute?

Well, I think a large part of having a car isn't about the transportation, its about forcing yourself to have the responsibility to 1)maintain a job, 2)save up money, and 3)maintain a steady expense. All of those are really valuable life lessons to have, and like a lot of things, best learned through experience.

I personally do get to work by jogging, but I wouldn't trade away my Nissan Altima just yet. Not until I can get a BMW, anyway. And honestly, I think that a lot of eco-friendly stuff is unfortunately a hypocritical, because its /expensive/ to maintain that lifestyle. I have the luxury of jogging to work because my company gives me a free gym with a shower and locker - how many jobs offer that? I have a friend who has a custom bike made from bamboowood and whatnot - very comfortable, beautifully ecologically friendly and far out of the reach of anyone who couldn't afford a car in the first place.

And on top of that, how many places can let you work at your best while smelling of sweat and exhausted from the ride? This isn't always true of some places, especially in Europe, where public transportation is easy, accurate and jobs can be a bit more flexible, but in the US, its very much an employer's market.

 

[Code S.O.L]

I can't drive. And any attempts to do so have failed miserably. Am I messed?

 

[Peter Lorre]

Apparently you won't get messed

 

[IgnoredOne]

Why can't you drive? If its some physical disability, that's understandable. If you just aren't willing to put in the effort/time for it, then, well, you know who to blame for that.

 

[Code S.O.L]

Why can't you drive?

For some reason, I can't divide my concentration on the many things required to be out on the road. When I was doing lessons, it more often than not lead to countless close calls. After failing the umpteenth manouver and freaking out too many times on main roads that my driving instructor suggested that I was wasting my time and money on trying to get my license.

 

[IgnoredOne]

For some reason, I can't divide my concentration on the many things required to be out on the road. When I was doing lessons, it more often than not lead to countless close calls. It became apparent after failing the umpteenth manouver and freaking out too many times on main roads that my driving instructor suggested that I was wasting my time and money on trying to get my license.

Interesting. Is this true only of your driving, or do you have difficulties in other aspects of your life that might require that kind of concentration? Jobs? Schoolwork?

Driving does require a kind of multitasking, but it is something that you can work on essentially clustering: you change lanes by 1)signal, 2)mirror, 3)over the shoulder, 4)go. Each task is focused on, one at a time.

 

[floffyschneeman]

Apparently only a lucky few can afford a car here. And so what will happen to the rest of the masses D:


Why are we still over populated? ¬¬

 

[Code S.O.L]

Interesting. Is this true only of your driving, or do you have difficulties in other aspects of your life that might require that kind of concentration? Jobs? Schoolwork?

Driving does require a kind of multitasking, but it is something that you can work on essentially clustering: you change lanes by 1)signal, 2)mirror, 3)over the shoulder, 4)go. Each task is focused on, one at a time.

Yup. My multitasking is horrid. But even more so behind the wheel, knowing that a stuff up might very well end me or someone else on the road.

 

[IgnoredOne]

Yup. My multitasking is horrid. But even more so behind the wheel, knowing that a stuff up might very well end me or someone else on the road.

I honestly suggest seeing if you might have symptoms of ADD or ADHD like I used to have, and taking steps to counteract it. There are many remedies, including natural ones that simply involve changing one's diet; all of that will improve your ability to handle tasks in general, and I believe it will be a wonderful improvement to your life, as well as increased happiness.

---

Apparently only a lucky few can afford a car here. And so what will happen to the rest of the masses D:


Why are we still over populated? ¬¬

Unfortunately, I don't know where exactly you live so I can't comment. I know even in Austria, though, even a teenage waitress friend of mine could afford an used car for around 3000 euros, with around 500 euros in insurance, etc. Difficult, but hardly impossible.

 

[Code S.O.L]

I honestly suggest seeing if you might have symptoms of ADD or ADHD like I used to have, and taking steps to counteract it. There are many remedies, including natural ones that simply involve changing one's diet; all of that will improve your ability to handle tasks in general, and I believe it will be a wonderful improvement to your life, as well as increased happiness.

I have autism. If that means anything.

 

[IgnoredOne]

I have autism. If that means anything.

That is unfortunately a physical issue that is beyond my reach of knowledge to comment. I can tell that you are high functioning by your writing, as a close friend of mine works with severely autistic children in a camp, including a girl who repeatedly and focusedly frigs herself on an Elmer doll, so by comparison, you are definitely much more capable.

Good luck and I do believe there are resources for that, but again, it is not part of my knowledge beyond the most basic.

 

[JustHateIT]

Get a car, get a job, then make a lot of money, buy a lot of stuff, then buy a girlfriend for yourself. Isn't this the same thing that author of this topic had in mind?

Ok. Seriously, it's just a whole bunch of BS. If you are looking for a serious relationship, you need to find a girl that would also be interested in serious relantionship and get along with her, then you can think about the things that you could do for one another, maybe for some cases having a car would be some of those, but not for most of it. However, if you want to buy a full time hooker for yourself, then yeaah, you will need a good car and lots of cold hard cash.

 

[IgnoredOne]

Get a car, get a job, then make a lot of money, buy a lot of stuff, then buy a girlfriend for yourself. Isn't this the same thing that author of this topic had in mind?

Ok. Seriously, it's just a whole bunch of BS. If you are looking for a serious relationship, you need to find a girl that would also be interested in serious relantionship and get along with her, then you can think about the things that you could do for one another, maybe for some cases having a car would be some of those, but not for most of it. However, if you want to buy a full time hooker for yourself, then yeaah, you will need a good car and lots of cold hard cash.

The point of the post concerns personal responsibility rather than pure monetary gain. However, if you wish to intepret it otherwise, I cannot deny you. Please feel free to be the guy in a 'serious' relationship who lives in his mother's basement with his now pregnant girlfriend, complaining why your life sucks.

A relationship is a significant responsibility. If you cannot be even responsible for yourself, then you should not be in a relationship. That is how I feel, nothing more, nothing less.

 

[Peter Lorre]

Yup. My multitasking is horrid. But even more so behind the wheel, knowing that a stuff up might very well end me or someone else on the road.

I honestly suggest seeing if you might have symptoms of ADD or ADHD like I used to have, and taking steps to counteract it. There are many remedies, including natural ones that simply involve changing one's diet; all of that will improve your ability to handle tasks in general, and I believe it will be a wonderful improvement to your life, as well as increased happiness.

---

Apparently only a lucky few can afford a car here. And so what will happen to the rest of the masses D:


Why are we still over populated? ¬¬

Unfortunately, I don't know where exactly you live so I can't comment. I know even in Austria, though, even a teenage waitress friend of mine could afford an used car for around 3000 euros, with around 500 euros in insurance, etc. Difficult, but hardly impossible.

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Here in Belgium you can get a used car for 500-1000 euro. It won't last you for years though

Also, I disagree with the topic. Having a car and finding the means to keep it, does not necessarily imply you're ready for a relationship, nor will it necessarily increase your chances of getting one.

In Brussels e.g. there's certain neighbourhoods where all the young people drive BMW's or Mercedes cars, just because they group up to buy a second hand one and take turns in driving it Most of them don't even have a job.

I guess that having your own place, would be a better example. You'd still need to make money in order to keep it and you'd gain the responsability of keeping it clean, cooking your own food, watching your expenses, maintenance,...

 

[Trojan]

I think he's talking more about having a big commitment/responsibility, rather than the physical aspect of having possessions.
Not that maintaining a car is the only way to gain responsibility. . .

 

[IgnoredOne]

Trojan has it - I can really only speak for the US, because I live in it. You adjust it as appropriate for where you live. The important thing is that you have that responsibility and commitment - it doesn't have to be a vehicle, but I do feel that is an important litimus test.

In Brussels e.g. there's certain neighbourhoods where all the young people drive BMW's or Mercedes cars, just because they group up to buy a second hand one and take turns in driving it Most of them don't even have a job.

Honestly, that's very cool. I would very much appreciate that, especially if I didn't need a car more often. If I could buy something and have it serve a community of people I trust, then that's so much more value for the money and I would love it if it was possible here too.

That said, wouldn't the mileage and wear/tear tell on it quickly? How would they share responsibility for the repairs and the maintenance?