Triple Bogey
Well-known member
jaguarundi said:
lol
Why do I find it so difficult ?
- Thread starter Triple Bogey
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lol
ardour
Well known loser
If it were just a matter of accepting "no, not interested" (rejection) it would be fine. But there can be serious reasons to fear asking women out. Basically, her disgust plus character assassination. Depending on their political views you might end up asking someone who thinks all unreciprocated interest from men is 'rapey', oppressive and so on. She could then make it her business to warn her sisters off of having anything to do with you or make it clear in non verbal ways that there's something not right about you. This can make life difficult, depending on where you work, who you associate with. Perhaps that's paranoid but it's not uncommon for men to find themselves the subject of a few remarks at least, for just attempting conversation in a non-threatening way. Minefield.
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
ardour said:
I agree, it isn't easy for some of us.
I mean I don't want to lose my job over this.
The best thing would be to bump into her outside of work and ask.
ardour said:
I agree, it isn't easy for some of us.
I mean I don't want to lose my job over this.
The best thing would be to bump into her outside of work and ask.
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
I am in 2 minds - one part thinks I have zero chance, the other thinks 'why the hell not ?'
SofiasMami
Well-known member
Triple Bogey said:
Now I'm curious to see which part wins!
-Teresa
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
SofiasMami said:Triple Bogey said:
Now I'm curious to see which part wins!
-Teresa
I won't do it.
It's because I don't see anything to suggest she likes me. Nothing at all. Plenty more fish in the sea though.
SofiasMami
Well-known member
Aw, bummer
-Teresa
-Teresa
ringwood
Well-known member
And around and around we go, where we stop nobody knows...*Sigh...*
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
I had a dream I did it and I was real happy. And then I woke up and was disappointed.
I am happy and confident and looking forward to my week off work next week.
Everything is good.
I am happy and confident and looking forward to my week off work next week.
Everything is good.
ringwood
Well-known member
Triple Bogey said:
OK....that's good enough for me...
But you may want to listen a little more to your dreams, I would venture a guess that your subconcious mind is trying to give you a boot in the ass too..."I had a dream I did it and I was real happy..."
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
ringwood said:
my dreams are usually doom and gloom. I think in my dream I was glad it was finally over, been a long week thinking about it. And when I woke up I thought 'honeysuckle' it was a dream and it's only Thursday.
I will take the photo's and note with me on Saturday. No idea what will happen though. Very much in 2 minds over this !
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
well tomorrow is 'Judgment Day' - cue Terminator 2 music !
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
I will write what happened in awhile.
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
I didn't bother.
I woke up with a migraine which didn't make it a good start to the day.
I started work at 6am and she usually comes in around 10 so I had 4 hours thinking about it.
I felt sick, I had an upset stomach, didn't feel very well, very nervous.
It got to 10.30 and I had convinced myself she wouldn't show when she walked in.
I didn't feel nervous then but I decided not to gave her the note. I had opportunities, I could have walked upto her and start talking but I didn't.
Things bug me, she doesn't look up and glance at me, never happens even when she is in the queue. She just looks at the floor.
I started serving her. I wasn't going to talk but she kept looking up a bit expecting it, so I asked her how she was. I then asked her what the 'A' stood for on her telephone bill (from last week) and was it her.
She didn't have a clue what I was talking about. Then she realized what I was on about and said 'it was a week ago, I couldn't remember' - I laughed and she said it was her. For a few moments I didn't think she was
going to tell me her name but eventually she did 'Allison' - I smiled because it was the name I had guessed. I told her this. She told me a bit about her name and then I said I sometimes try to guess people's name. I told her I was off work next week and she said she was. I asked what she was doing and she said 'catching up' - that's it. I said I would be wandering around the Yorkshire dales getting lost taking photo's. She wished me a nice holiday and said 'bye'
When I got home I ripped the note up and threw it in the bin. Glad I didn't do it. She doesn't show enough interest in my photo's, it wasn't a good idea. I am glad I know her name though. And I am going to use from now on. People like it when you use their names. She must know I like her. I think I have made it obvious now. I told her I was wondering what her name was. Women pick up on things like that don't they ?
I wish I could see some kind of interest from her. But I can't. But then again I can't see interest from any woman. They don't like me.
I woke up with a migraine which didn't make it a good start to the day.
I started work at 6am and she usually comes in around 10 so I had 4 hours thinking about it.
I felt sick, I had an upset stomach, didn't feel very well, very nervous.
It got to 10.30 and I had convinced myself she wouldn't show when she walked in.
I didn't feel nervous then but I decided not to gave her the note. I had opportunities, I could have walked upto her and start talking but I didn't.
Things bug me, she doesn't look up and glance at me, never happens even when she is in the queue. She just looks at the floor.
I started serving her. I wasn't going to talk but she kept looking up a bit expecting it, so I asked her how she was. I then asked her what the 'A' stood for on her telephone bill (from last week) and was it her.
She didn't have a clue what I was talking about. Then she realized what I was on about and said 'it was a week ago, I couldn't remember' - I laughed and she said it was her. For a few moments I didn't think she was
going to tell me her name but eventually she did 'Allison' - I smiled because it was the name I had guessed. I told her this. She told me a bit about her name and then I said I sometimes try to guess people's name. I told her I was off work next week and she said she was. I asked what she was doing and she said 'catching up' - that's it. I said I would be wandering around the Yorkshire dales getting lost taking photo's. She wished me a nice holiday and said 'bye'
When I got home I ripped the note up and threw it in the bin. Glad I didn't do it. She doesn't show enough interest in my photo's, it wasn't a good idea. I am glad I know her name though. And I am going to use from now on. People like it when you use their names. She must know I like her. I think I have made it obvious now. I told her I was wondering what her name was. Women pick up on things like that don't they ?
I wish I could see some kind of interest from her. But I can't. But then again I can't see interest from any woman. They don't like me.
beautiful loser
Well-known member
"I wish I could see some kind of interest from her. But I can't. But then again I can't see interest from any woman. They don't like me."
Could it possibly be that she's an introvert and extremely shy? You said all she does, while standing in queue, is look at the floor. At least you know her name, now use it and slowly get her to open up. All is not lost....haha...I just noticed the first seven letters of that statement spell her name
Could it possibly be that she's an introvert and extremely shy? You said all she does, while standing in queue, is look at the floor. At least you know her name, now use it and slowly get her to open up. All is not lost....haha...I just noticed the first seven letters of that statement spell her name
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
beautiful loser said:"I wish I could see some kind of interest from her. But I can't. But then again I can't see interest from any woman. They don't like me."
Could it possibly be that she's an introvert and extremely shy? You said all she does, while standing in queue, is look at the floor. At least you know her name, now use it and slowly get her to open up. All is not lost....haha...I just noticed the first seven letters of that statement spell her name
Yes I think she is shy. That is what I find attractive about her. And she is always by her herself and I haven't seen her talk to anybody in the shop. So I wanted to get to know her. It became a pet project for me.
I know people are different. Some customers talk to me from across the shop. Some walk in and glance at me. Some smile, some say 'hi', some say my name. Some people are loud, some are quiet.
ringwood
Well-known member
Coming from a woman who is quite shy, I would act in a similar fashion to Alison - a busy public place would not be the ideal situation to talk, pretty much small talk is all you would get out of me..at first. Great that you finally know her name, and I agree with Beautiful Loser, use it to get to know her better - she is no longer the mysterious woman who skulks into your store, she is Allison. You're on a first name basis now, good start!
Triple Bogey
Well-known member
ringwood said:Coming from a woman who is quite shy, I would act in a similar fashion to Alison - a busy public place would not be the ideal situation to talk, pretty much small talk is all you would get out of me..at first. Great that you finally know her name, and I agree with Beautiful Loser, use it to get to know her better - she is no longer the mysterious woman who skulks into your store, she is Allison. You're on a first name basis now, good start!
Thanks Ringwood !
I think I did okay today. The note idea was too much too soon. I made the right choice. It was embarrassing asking her name but I did. She was blushing a bit. She must know.
beautiful loser
Well-known member
"Great that you finally know her name, and I agree with Beautiful Loser, use it to get to know her better - she is no longer the mysterious woman who skulks into your store, she is Allison."
Of course you do, Wormser, because great minds think alike
Bogey, I think did the right thing, because I don't recall you saying she was really shy in other posts...if you did, I apologize. I think most of us just wanted you to just do it because she could be one of those you let get away. Now, we know she's really shy and just take it slowly.
Also, I have to admit when I schemed with ways to ask someone out or had a plan all made up in my mind and how things would go...well, honestly, it didn't go well. It always seemed that when I just went off the cuff and did a spur of the moment thing that they actually worked better for me, cause it seemed more natural. So, maybe it is good you take your time with Allison, then down the road pretend you have a spur of the moment idea and maybe then show her your pictures and suggest she can tag along if she wanted to. *why am I faintly hearing "Love Is In The Air" by Tom Jones*
Of course you do, Wormser, because great minds think alike
Bogey, I think did the right thing, because I don't recall you saying she was really shy in other posts...if you did, I apologize. I think most of us just wanted you to just do it because she could be one of those you let get away. Now, we know she's really shy and just take it slowly.
Also, I have to admit when I schemed with ways to ask someone out or had a plan all made up in my mind and how things would go...well, honestly, it didn't go well. It always seemed that when I just went off the cuff and did a spur of the moment thing that they actually worked better for me, cause it seemed more natural. So, maybe it is good you take your time with Allison, then down the road pretend you have a spur of the moment idea and maybe then show her your pictures and suggest she can tag along if she wanted to. *why am I faintly hearing "Love Is In The Air" by Tom Jones*
