boy troubles, help!

[strawberryfields]

my boyfriend is at a music festival without me right now, im trying so hard not to think about it but to make matters worse he is there with some of my friends too AND we had a massive argument months before because he didn't think i could handle a music festival...then he eventually said i should only go for the right reasons and that he wasn't going to look after me and that he wanted it to be about him and all his friends but by then it was too late, he'd put me off and hurt me so much that i didnt feel like i was welcome to go and now im on my own at home and i just feel so hurt that he would be happy to go without me...and even worse, not want me to go with him

 

[ShybutHi]

Well that is a bit messed up, surely you dont need to argue about if you could handle it or not? If you dont feel comfortable with going then fair enough and if you do then surely he should be happy that you are going with him. You are his girlfriend afterall so I would of thought he would want you there.
I was at a festival last weekend and some of my friends went with their girlfriends, they usually go together (been to more than one with them) you have to make a little bit of a sacrifice in a way if you are going with your partner I think, but it does depend on the situation. What I mean by this is the fact that if you are going with your partner then generally you would stick together unless you both have some friends you can hang around with seperatly from each other who you feel comfortable with it.

 

[strawberryfields]

Well that is a bit messed up, surely you dont need to argue about if you could handle it or not? If you dont feel comfortable with going then fair enough and if you do then surely he should be happy that you are going with him. You are his girlfriend afterall so I would of thought he would want you there.
I was at a festival last weekend and some of my friends went with their girlfriends, they usually go together (been to more than one with them) you have to make a little bit of a sacrifice in a way if you are going with your partner I think, but it does depend on the situation. What I mean by this is the fact that if you are going with your partner then generally you would stick together unless you both have some friends you can hang around with seperatly from each other who you feel comfortable with it.

yeah i know its messed up, and i know what u mean that we shouldnt have had to argue about whether i can handle it because id said all along that i would love to go to a music festival, so it's been pretty hard for the last few days, he's gone with his friends who brought girlfriends along and i don't know if ill be able to get over this

 

[Mazda13bRotary]

What's going on at this music festival? Alcohol, marijuana? How trustworthy is this fellow?

 

[strawberryfields]

What's going on at this music festival? Alcohol, marijuana? How trustworthy is this fellow?

he is trustworthy, i just think he plans to do a lot of drinking, but he thinks i cant handle this festival because its all about staying up untilt he early hours getting drunk, hanging out in the mosh pit and staying in a tent for a few days...and to be honest its nothing ive done before but i really wanted the experience

 

[ShybutHi]

Ah, the festival I went to is a heavy metal festival I was actually going to write about how ofcourse a girl generally shouldnt go into the mosh pits which means you are going to be split up if he wants to go in. To be honest though all this is just about communication and understanding.

Would you mind him getting really drunk until the early hours? If not then he should not have a problem. Also its only a few days in a tent im sure anyone could handle it, they have everything you need there like showers and stuff surely aswell.

You said your friends were there so if he wanted to go off meeting people and stuff and you didnt want to, surely you could hang around with your friends?

I could understand if you had no friends there that he might see you being there as a bit of a crutch (if hes the adventerous type who likes to walk about meeting lots of people, but your not, especially if hes really drunk lol) The thing is like I said before you have got to make a sacrifice for your partner, be considerate to what they want to do too. Infact what you wrote makes it sound like the guy is a bit selfish.

 

[Mazda13bRotary]

Find something you really enjoy doing, then when he gets back from the festival go do that something. Suggest to him that he doesn't go.

 

[sentiententity]

What's going on at this music festival? Alcohol, marijuana? How trustworthy is this fellow?

he is trustworthy, i just think he plans to do a lot of drinking, but he thinks i cant handle this festival because its all about staying up untilt he early hours getting drunk, hanging out in the mosh pit and staying in a tent for a few days...and to be honest its nothing ive done before but i really wanted the experience

That festival sounds painful.

 

[sylent]

Sometimes its about boys being boys in my opinion. I mean I could love a girl like no other but there are things I would rather do with the boys. Its not that he is rejecting you, it just that he wants some time with his buddies probably. My 2 cents.

 

[Pheenix]

If he didn't think you could handle it, he didn't think you could handle it. I see nothing wrong with that. By "at least don't go and make everything about you" I assume he is simply restating that one shouldn't go if one ends up needing supervision.

 

[strawberryfields]

Sometimes its about boys being boys in my opinion. I mean I could love a girl like no other but there are things I would rather do with the boys. Its not that he is rejecting you, it just that he wants some time with his buddies probably. My 2 cents.

i get what you're saying and i would understand if he wanted it to be just a boys thing but his friends brought their girlfriends along and the fact that he was ok with them going made it hard for me