Down on myself. What if you actually are a creep?

[msbxa]

Does anyone ever think that maybe you actually are just a creep?

I'm not even sure exactly what a "creep" even is.
But in western societies it seems that a quiet, introverted, shy, loner type of guy is looked down upon.
(I personally don't think there is anything wrong with being this way, but I also do not think like the majority of people).

If a creep or loser is a guy who is shy and different and a loner and who stands out from the rest, I guess that is what I am.
A guy who probably won't talk to you but if you talk to him he might get attached to you.
Another thing I do that maybe be creepy is when I see an attractive girl, I can't help but check her out. Then when she looks back I'll almost always look away in shyness. I guess I'm just a creep.

If you are a creep or a loser, according to the current society you are in of course, what the heck are you supposed to do? Maybe just keep your head down in shame and accept it. ? Try to enjoy the little things in life that you do have. ?

 

[Xpendable]

A creep is a man who's questionable behavior or awkwardness is not overcome by his physical attractiveness.

[video=youtube]

 

[there is no hope]

There is a difference between what others are conditioned to deem a creep, and doing things that genuinely cause others pain. It's a convenient line of attack, and plenty of people get away with things that others won't due to their social status, appearance, and so on. I know I get away with some things just because I'm not fat or so unattractive, though it doesn't stop anyone from levelling a creep charge whenever they want.

I don't have any good advice except to not try to think too much about what other people think. I'm quite sure the people levelling charges against you aren't thinking too much about it.

The net result of repeated creep charges is that the victim has no real defense. The mere fact that someone can level charges with impunity, over and over again, and the victim cannot defend himself, means that anyone who falls too far behind can be socially destroyed. You can't reason with people to not use that violence when it costs them nothing and gains them everything.

 

[lonelypanda]

A shy person is not a creep, unless he sends an unsolicited dick pic, then he's a creep.

I guess creep is just a feeling you get from someone. A guy checking me out doesn't creep me out, a guy staring at me and not looking away for an awkwardly long period of time, I get creeper vibes. It has nothing to do with how hot or how ugly, how old or young, how shy or outgoing. I have gotten creeper vibes from all of the above.

 

[BreakingtheGirl]

A shy person is not a creep, unless he sends an unsolicited dick pic, then he's a creep.

I guess creep is just a feeling you get from someone. A guy checking me out doesn't creep me out, a guy staring at me and not looking away for an awkwardly long period of time, I get creeper vibes. It has nothing to do with how hot or how ugly, how old or young, how shy or outgoing. I have gotten creeper vibes from all of the above.

^^ I agree lonelypanda. I've called people "creepers" or thought someone was "creepy" by their actions, mainly sexual. Or staring aggressively, making sexual comments thinking I'd like it or something. Even dudes following me & making sexual gestures and making me feel really uncomfortable. Around my city, they're called drunks by the Staples Center & Sunset Blvd haha. I'd never think someone who is shy or introverted is a creep at all. Some people just use the word incorrectly to be used to as a put down.
UGH dick pics....say NO to dick pics! The pics can be erased, but not the visual memory

 

[dd11]

You don't have to wear other people's labels. There is nothing wrong with being quiet, shy, introverted or any of those things. Yes if you are staring lustfully at women, then that might be something you can tone down, lol. Embrace who you are. Find what interests you and enjoy your life.

 

[Xpendable]

A shy person is not a creep, unless he sends an unsolicited dick pic, then he's a creep.

A shy person would never send a dick pick. You know, because they're shy. If they do then they were nerver actually shy. I don't like how people asociate shyness with "ulterior motives". Like if someone is quiet it must mean they're hidding some evil plan.

 

[Minus]

I tend to think of a creep as an obnoxious person or a perverse deviant and the only association it would have with introversion is that people can made some pretty dumb assumptions about people who are too quiet or withdrawn.

It would appear that there is a minor attempt to put introversion in the same category.

Merriam-Webster
an unpleasant or obnoxious person

Oxford Dictionaries
informal A detestable person.

Random House Webster's Dictionary
repellent or obnoxious person.

Cambridge Dictionaries Online
Slang. an obnoxious, disturbingly eccentric, deviant, or painfully introverted person.

 

[lonelypanda]

A shy person would never send a dick pick. You know, because they're shy. If they do then they were nerver actually shy.

You're being to general, not every shy person will never do something out of their comfort zone. So if a shy person stood up and did karaoke one day they can never call themselves shy anymore ? They did one thing that might be deemed as an unshy act, so they can't ever feel shy anymore. I'm sure in the history of everdome a shy person has sent a dick pic. I've gotten anonymous dick pics, that person might of been too shy to put a face to his dick. Heh

I don't like how people asociate shyness with "ulterior motives". Like if someone is quiet it must mean they're hidding some evil plan.

Well we were on the topic of shy being perceived as creepy, so I was giving an example of what a shy person could do that I would perceive them as creepy. Unless you are speaking in general now, I would say that's not something I've observed. Shy people usually just fade into the background, not really thought about much.

 

[Xpendable]

A shy person would never send a dick pic. You know, because they're shy. If they do then they were nerver actually shy.

You're being too general, not every shy person will never do something out of their comfort zone.

Someone who does something of the caliber of sending a dick pic probably never saw the action as out of their comfort zone in the first place.

Shy person:

"I'm really nervous to talk with that person. I know, I'll send a picture of my genitals, that sounds a lot less expository".

So if a shy person stood up and did karaoke one day they can never call themselves shy anymore?

False equivalence. Singing karaoke is not seen as morally reprehensible. While a dick pic would qualify as sexual harassment. A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

They did one thing that might be deemed as an unshy act, so they can't ever feel shy anymore?

If someone does one thing that you may perceive as creepy, is the person creepy forever? or can they "un-creep" themselves?

I'm sure in the history of everdome a shy person has sent a dick pic.

Does Not correlate with the idea that shyness and creepiness are complementary. If you can't prove it, then is not evidence.

I don't like how people asociate shyness with "ulterior motives". Like if someone is quiet it must mean they're hidding some evil plan.

Well we were on the topic of shy being perceived as creepy, so I was giving an example of what a shy person could do that I would perceive them as creepy.

And I'm arguing that what you perceive is not necessarily true of fair.

Unless you are speaking in general now, I would say that's not something I've observed. Shy people usually just fade into the background, not really thought about much.

Having exceptions does not prevent from doing generalizations. I have not observed it either.

 

[red guy]

A creep is somebody who can't contain their primitive desires in public. These are not always sexual in nature. It is just a matter how well you wear your social mask.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Nobody who has met me as called me a creep. (To my face anyway)
Online, a few people after seeing my photograph have said I look creepy.
Which (a) isn't very ******* nice and (b) not ******* true !

 

[msbxa]

Woah I really started up a conversation here. It is good though. Things that need to be thought about. Things I need to think as well and hear different perspectives to alter my perspectives.

I never do anything sexual. I'm more on the opposite end of the spectrum. Because I never do anything sexual or make sexual jokes. Can being on the other end of the extreme be considered creepy?

It seems like in today's society, people are doing all kinds of sexual things. Making sexual jokes. Talking about sexual things.
It amazes me that there are men that send dick pics. Like wtf? Do they actually get positive results after doing that? Where did this even come from, I never heard about men doing this sort of thing years ago.

I've never actually been called a creep, to my recall, ever in my life. But I sure feel like one sometimes when it seems people ignore me and shut me out just because I don't act like or like the same things or take the same image as everyone else.
Perhaps I am just too hard on myself.

 

[lonelypanda]

Someone who does something of the caliber of sending a dick pic probably never saw the action as out of their comfort zone in the first place.

Shy person:

"I'm really nervous to talk with that person. I know, I'll send a picture of my genitals, that sounds a lot less expository".

You're arguing a FEELING. You can't tell someone they are not feeling something. So let's say someone does send a dick pic, they could still be shy in other aspects of life. There's a whole spectrum there. I don't even know why you're arguing this, it's perplexing.

False equivalence. Singing karaoke is not seen as morally reprehensible. While a dick pic would qualify as sexual harassment. A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

Okay, a shy person goes streaking. They can still be too shy to stand up and speak inront of class. Some of the most outgoing people I know have bouts of shyness, again, you're argueing an emotion which is odd. One shy person could never do anything that would be put them in the spotlight or in a bad light, but another one just might.

If someone does one thing that you may perceive as creepy, is the person creepy forever? or can they "un-creep" themselves?

You didn't answer my question, why? You just asked me another question. I'll answer that question when you answer mine.

Does Not correlate with the idea that shyness and creepiness are complementary. If you can't prove it, then is not evidence.

How can I prove what someone feels? You can do something bold and still be shy, you don't get to decide someone sending a dick pic can never feel shy in his life ever again.

And I'm arguing that what you perceive is not necessarily true of fair.

What? You have me lost. I said from the start "creep" is a feeling you get from someone, and any one of any age, looks etc can give you that feeling based on their actions. I don't associate shy people with being creeps.
I asociate pervert comments, long stares etc as being creepy, and anyone can be capable of doing that.

---

Woah I really started up a conversation here. It is good though. Things that need to be thought about. Things I need to think as well and hear different perspectives to alter my perspectives.

I never do anything sexual. I'm more on the opposite end of the spectrum. Because I never do anything sexual or make sexual jokes. Can being on the other end of the extreme be considered creepy?

It seems like in today's society, people are doing all kinds of sexual things. Making sexual jokes. Talking about sexual things.
It amazes me that there are men that send dick pics. Like wtf? Do they actually get positive results after doing that? Where did this even come from, I never heard about men doing this sort of thing years ago.

I've never actually been called a creep, to my recall, ever in my life. But I sure feel like one sometimes when it seems people ignore me and shut me out just because I don't act like or like the same things or take the same image as everyone else.
Perhaps I am just too hard on myself.

I think you're being hard on yourself, I think you sound cute and sweet. I like when guys are shy, agressive men are unattactive.

Even if someone did think you're a creep or call you a creep. There's always going to be someone somewhere who has a negative thought about you. Can't please everyone, it matters more what you think of yourself. I've been called whack, weird, crazy. I am, but I love it and other people's opinions of me are non of my business.

---

Nobody who has met me as called me a creep. (To my face anyway)
Online, a few people after seeing my photograph have said I look creepy.
Which (a) isn't very ******* nice and (b) not ******* true !

That is so ******* rude, I hate the disconnect people have online, they would never say that in real life but feel compelled to do so online.

 

[Xpendable]

Someone who does something of the caliber of sending a dick pic probably never saw the action as out of their comfort zone in the first place.

Shy person:

"I'm really nervous to talk with that person. I know, I'll send a picture of my genitals, that sounds a lot less expository".

You're arguing a FEELING. You can't tell someone they are not feeling something. So let's say someone does send a dick pic, they could still be shy in other aspects of life. There's a whole spectrum there. I don't even know why you're arguing this, it's perplexing.

Ok. I get you, I just thought you were relating shyness with creepiness. But I still think shyness prevents people from doing creepy things instead of encourage them. Maybe anonymity can play a big role in how both things develop, but I don't know.

False equivalence. Singing karaoke is not seen as morally reprehensible. While a dick pic would qualify as sexual harassment. A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

Okay, a shy person goes streaking. They can still be too shy to stand up and speak in front of class. Some of the most outgoing people I know have bouts of shyness, again, you're argueing an emotion which is odd. One shy person could never do anything that would be put them in the spotlight or in a bad light, but another one just might.

I don't know. I've never meet a person so ambivalent.

If someone does one thing that you may perceive as creepy, is the person creepy forever? or can they "un-creep" themselves?

You didn't answer my question, why? You just asked me another question. I'll answer that question when you answer mine.

It sounded like you think if a shy person does something bold, then they're not really shy, or they can gravitate between both extremes; which is unlikely. So I asked you with the same idea. Can someone who is creepy be non-creepy at any moment? And if so, would you still think (sorry, feel) they're creepy if they behave normally?

Does Not correlate with the idea that shyness and creepiness are complementary. If you can't prove it, then is not evidence.

How can I prove what someone feels?

Scannig their brain.

You can do something bold and still be shy, you don't get to decide someone sending a dick pic can never feel shy in his life ever again.

But seriously, it sounds incredibly contradictory to call someone shy and then believe they can do something totally radical as that. Shyness is not a switch you can turn on and off at will.

And I'm arguing that what you perceive is not necessarily true of fair.

What? You lost me. I said from the start "creep" is a feeling you get from someone, and any one of any age, looks etc can give you that feeling based on their actions. I don't associate shy people with being creeps.
I asociate pervert comments, long stares etc as being creepy, and anyone can be capable of doing that.

Maybe, but shy pople are a lot less capable of such behavior, so I don't think that anyone can be a creep or do creepy things when they're reluctant to even engage in social interactions. Creepiness and shyness seem really antagonical to me.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Someone who does something of the caliber of sending a dick pic probably never saw the action as out of their comfort zone in the first place.

Shy person:

"I'm really nervous to talk with that person. I know, I'll send a picture of my genitals, that sounds a lot less expository".

You're arguing a FEELING. You can't tell someone they are not feeling something. So let's say someone does send a dick pic, they could still be shy in other aspects of life. There's a whole spectrum there. I don't even know why you're arguing this, it's perplexing.

False equivalence. Singing karaoke is not seen as morally reprehensible. While a dick pic would qualify as sexual harassment. A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

Okay, a shy person goes streaking. They can still be too shy to stand up and speak inront of class. Some of the most outgoing people I know have bouts of shyness, again, you're argueing an emotion which is odd. One shy person could never do anything that would be put them in the spotlight or in a bad light, but another one just might.

If someone does one thing that you may perceive as creepy, is the person creepy forever? or can they "un-creep" themselves?

You didn't answer my question, why? You just asked me another question. I'll answer that question when you answer mine.

Does Not correlate with the idea that shyness and creepiness are complementary. If you can't prove it, then is not evidence.

How can I prove what someone feels? You can do something bold and still be shy, you don't get to decide someone sending a dick pic can never feel shy in his life ever again.

And I'm arguing that what you perceive is not necessarily true of fair.

What? You have me lost. I said from the start "creep" is a feeling you get from someone, and any one of any age, looks etc can give you that feeling based on their actions. I don't associate shy people with being creeps.
I asociate pervert comments, long stares etc as being creepy, and anyone can be capable of doing that.

---

Woah I really started up a conversation here. It is good though. Things that need to be thought about. Things I need to think as well and hear different perspectives to alter my perspectives.

I never do anything sexual. I'm more on the opposite end of the spectrum. Because I never do anything sexual or make sexual jokes. Can being on the other end of the extreme be considered creepy?

It seems like in today's society, people are doing all kinds of sexual things. Making sexual jokes. Talking about sexual things.
It amazes me that there are men that send dick pics. Like wtf? Do they actually get positive results after doing that? Where did this even come from, I never heard about men doing this sort of thing years ago.

I've never actually been called a creep, to my recall, ever in my life. But I sure feel like one sometimes when it seems people ignore me and shut me out just because I don't act like or like the same things or take the same image as everyone else.
Perhaps I am just too hard on myself.

I think you're being hard on yourself, I think you sound cute and sweet. I like when guys are shy, agressive men are unattactive.

Even if someone did think you're a creep or call you a creep. There's always going to be someone somewhere who has a negative thought about you. Can't please everyone, it matters more what you think of yourself. I've been called whack, weird, crazy. I am, but I love it and other people's opinions of me are non of my business.

---

Nobody who has met me as called me a creep. (To my face anyway)
Online, a few people after seeing my photograph have said I look creepy.
Which (a) isn't very ******* nice and (b) not ******* true !

That is so ******* rude, I hate the disconnect people have online, they would never say that in real life but feel compelled to do so online.

---

---

It is. And I can't exactly help how I look anyway.

 

[lonelypanda]

Someone who does something of the caliber of sending a dick pic probably never saw the action as out of their comfort zone in the first place.

Shy person:

"I'm really nervous to talk with that person. I know, I'll send a picture of my genitals, that sounds a lot less expository".

You're arguing a FEELING. You can't tell someone they are not feeling something. So let's say someone does send a dick pic, they could still be shy in other aspects of life. There's a whole spectrum there. I don't even know why you're arguing this, it's perplexing.

Ok. I get you, I just thought you were relating shyness with creepiness. But I still think shyness prevents people from doing creepy things instead of encourage them. Maybe anonymity can play a big role in how both things develop, but I don't know.

False equivalence. Singing karaoke is not seen as morally reprehensible. While a dick pic would qualify as sexual harassment. A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

Okay, a shy person goes streaking. They can still be too shy to stand up and speak in front of class. Some of the most outgoing people I know have bouts of shyness, again, you're argueing an emotion which is odd. One shy person could never do anything that would be put them in the spotlight or in a bad light, but another one just might.

I don't know. I've never meet a person so ambivalent.

If someone does one thing that you may perceive as creepy, is the person creepy forever? or can they "un-creep" themselves?

You didn't answer my question, why? You just asked me another question. I'll answer that question when you answer mine.

It sounded like you think if a shy person does something bold, then they're not really shy, or they can gravitate between both extremes; which is unlikely. So I asked you with the same idea. Can someone who is creepy be non-creepy at any moment? And if so, would you still think (sorry, feel) they're creepy if they behave normally?

Does Not correlate with the idea that shyness and creepiness are complementary. If you can't prove it, then is not evidence.

How can I prove what someone feels?

Scannig their brain.

You can do something bold and still be shy, you don't get to decide someone sending a dick pic can never feel shy in his life ever again.

But seriously, it sounds incredibly contradictory to call someone shy and then believe they can do something totally radical as that. Shyness is not a switch you can turn on and off at will.

And I'm arguing that what you perceive is not necessarily true of fair.

What? You lost me. I said from the start "creep" is a feeling you get from someone, and any one of any age, looks etc can give you that feeling based on their actions. I don't associate shy people with being creeps.
I asociate pervert comments, long stares etc as being creepy, and anyone can be capable of doing that.

Maybe, but shy pople are a lot less capable of such behavior, so I don't think that anyone can be a creep or do creepy when they're reluctant to even engage in social interaction. Creepiness and shyness seem really antagonical to me.

I think there's a large spectrum there though, shy isn't just one behavior. You could get the extreme shy person and on the other end someone who is occasionally shy. Ive had some friends I call sober shy, get and few drinks in them and I got them doing the crazy honeysuckle I do that they would never do sober. Sometimes it's a complete 180 to how they normally act.

I think you can uncreep yourself, like let's say a guy creeped me out and I verbalized that to him, if he later said "sorry that was inappropriate". It would be water under the bridge, but this also depends on the level of creep. A dick pic is a non forgive zone.

 

[Solivagant]

I don't associate shy people with being creeps.
I asociate pervert comments, long stares etc as being creepy, and anyone can be capable of doing that.

I agree with lonelypanda.

A shy person would be less afraid to sing that to offend the law.

That's not necessarily true. Karaoke singing is nearly akin to public speaking, which is something many people fear worse than death, lol.

Maybe, but shy pople are a lot less capable of such behavior, so I don't think that anyone can be a creep or do creepy when they're reluctant to even engage in social interaction. Creepiness and shyness seem really antagonical to me.

I disagree. I think the reluctance to engage in social interaction is the very thing that could motivate a shy person to do something creepy. For instance, in the OP's other thread, he considered sending the woman he likes an anonymous email, which could have seemed creepy to the woman he wanted to send it to (I couldn't say for sure, but I usually find anonymous messages a little creepy). I watched a movie recently called "Alone With Her", about a shy man who sneaked hidden cameras into the apartment of the woman he was fixated on. Granted, that was a movie, but it's been done in real life. Being shy is in no way indicative of being creepy, however I think people who are reluctant to interact face-to-face are just as likely as others to resort to stalking-type behaviors, which many people would consider creepy.


P.S. To be clear, I don't think the OP is a "creep".

I've never actually been called a creep, to my recall, ever in my life. But I sure feel like one sometimes when it seems people ignore me and shut me out just because I don't act like or like the same things or take the same image as everyone else.
Perhaps I am just too hard on myself.

I think you are being too hard on yourself. A lot of people are ignored and shut out for being shy, introverted, different, or something else. Those qualities have nothing to do with being creepy in and of themselves.

Speaking from experience, I am introverted, shy, socially anxious, reserved, "different", what have you, and I have been called creepy. I've been called a lot of things. I'm not immune to it, it hurt my feelings. There will be people who judge you like that for no good reason, it's inevitable. Probably even a lot of them. You just have to try to be okay with yourself regardless.

 

[Xpendable]

Maybe, but shy pople are a lot less capable of such behavior, so I don't think that anyone can be a creep or do creepy when they're reluctant to even engage in social interaction. Creepiness and shyness seem really antagonical to me.

I disagree. I think the reluctance to engage in social interaction is the very thing that could motivate a shy person to do something creepy. For instance, in the OP's other thread, he considered sending the woman he likes an anonymous email, which could have seemed creepy to the woman he wanted to send it to (I couldn't say for sure, but I usually find anonymous messages a little creepy). I watched a movie recently called "Alone With Her", about a shy man who sneaked hidden cameras into the apartment of the woman he was fixated on. Granted, that was a movie, but it's been done in real life. Being shy is in no way indicative of being creepy, however I think people who are reluctant to interact face-to-face are just as likely as others to resort to stalking-type behaviors, which many people would consider creepy.

If that the case, does creepiness comes from malice?
And if doesn't, why are women so ready to associate it with bad intentions instead of just social inadequacy?