Relentless
Active member
- Joined
- Jan 14, 2012
- Messages
- 36
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Hello all,
This may seem like a disagreeable thing to be asking but rest asured it is with the kindest of intentions - that being a more harmonious home life. For a very long time my relationship with my mother has been slightly toxic, she is just too abrasive, argumentative, unstable in her emotions and in turn she too brings out the worst in me. I have on many occasions saught to move out as I am certainly old enough (20) but I simply can't afford it.
This sounds like we are always arguing, and we are, but not quite - it's completely dependent on what mood she is in and that fluctuates all the time. She can be very nice one minute and then somthing happens or somthing (often petty, blown out of proportion) sets her off and thats it. This unpredictability makes the whole affair even more frustrating. She's also the type of person who through having an argument or disagreement with one person - she has an argument/disagreement with everyone, takes things out on others and the like.
Thing is you cant walk away from it because she just goes on and on and on and on if she doesn't get a reaction from you. Its tedium personified and to be honest all a bit juvenile. I live with her, my nan and my much younger brother. She's had depression before and I'm pretty sure she has depression now but to be honest I give so few shits due to the fact that it is largely her antics that sent me off the rails 2 years ago, ultimately culminateing in my own major encounter with the black dog which I now fight every day.
I figure it's best subvert the nature of our relationship from being my mother to her simply being my landlord, but do it subtly so not to get her on the defensive. I imagine this will cut a lot of the potential for argument out. Any ideas on how I can do this?
By the way please dont suggest we resolve this, I've tried. She is intrinsically irrational and simply reverts to her old ways within a few days of resolution.
This may seem like a disagreeable thing to be asking but rest asured it is with the kindest of intentions - that being a more harmonious home life. For a very long time my relationship with my mother has been slightly toxic, she is just too abrasive, argumentative, unstable in her emotions and in turn she too brings out the worst in me. I have on many occasions saught to move out as I am certainly old enough (20) but I simply can't afford it.
This sounds like we are always arguing, and we are, but not quite - it's completely dependent on what mood she is in and that fluctuates all the time. She can be very nice one minute and then somthing happens or somthing (often petty, blown out of proportion) sets her off and thats it. This unpredictability makes the whole affair even more frustrating. She's also the type of person who through having an argument or disagreement with one person - she has an argument/disagreement with everyone, takes things out on others and the like.
Thing is you cant walk away from it because she just goes on and on and on and on if she doesn't get a reaction from you. Its tedium personified and to be honest all a bit juvenile. I live with her, my nan and my much younger brother. She's had depression before and I'm pretty sure she has depression now but to be honest I give so few shits due to the fact that it is largely her antics that sent me off the rails 2 years ago, ultimately culminateing in my own major encounter with the black dog which I now fight every day.
I figure it's best subvert the nature of our relationship from being my mother to her simply being my landlord, but do it subtly so not to get her on the defensive. I imagine this will cut a lot of the potential for argument out. Any ideas on how I can do this?
By the way please dont suggest we resolve this, I've tried. She is intrinsically irrational and simply reverts to her old ways within a few days of resolution.
