how do i get in to a relationship when....

[slappopkarl]

You get a person like me.
I'm very shy around new people espically girls, I struggle to speak to them or approach them on a night out. The last time I had a girl friend was 4 years ago and that leads to another thing, what would I do with her? If I did get a girl friend.
And there is more, I have major trust issues, I don't trust anyone due to being messed about by (yup that's right) woman. When I'm on a night aswell everyone thinks I'm gay and ask my pals if I am wich again isn't good for my self confidence. I guess I'm not looking for much but just for a moan. Thanks

 

[SofiasMami]

Hi-
I guess you just have to fake it til you make it. I'm apprehensive about talking even to people I know, and it's much worse when it comes to strangers. I just got back into the dating scene and thought I would die of nervousness the first time I met someone at a coffee shop. But the more I've done it, the more confident I am. And we've all been messed around with at one time or another by a member of the opposite sex. It happens to everyone. That doesn't mean you have to write off girls forever, though.
Welcome to the forum, by the way!
Teresa

 

[Lynx]

Hey moan all you want- nothing wrong with that.

I can relate to your post, including the trust issues. It's hard to meet people when you have trust issues because you can't allow your real self to come out unless you trust the people you're around. It's cyclical. Unfortunately I have no advice on that front- sorry. The best I can offer is to try hobbling through the social gracelessness until the trust is gained.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Hmm.... well really it is up to you. You have to find the courage in you to change. Stop thinking about why you are going to fail. Start thinking about how you are going to succeed.

As for being shy, well why not go to someplace far away to start practicing flirting. You can go out and know that if you humiliate yourself and never come back. None of these people will likely see you ever again. Who knows maybe you will meet someone.

As for your trust issues. Instead of going out with the expectation of finding your next potential soul mate. Go out and meet a female to just have a short fling with. Someone who will come and go with the season.

 

[slappopkarl]

Thanks everyone.
AFrozenSoul I might just do that. See when I was in the army and we went out for a drink in one of the towns I didn't have a problem pulling a bird so maybe your right.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Practice makes perfect friend. You do not have to go far if you do not frequent the same place very often.

 

[Emma ruby]

be a friend before you become a boyfriend

 

[Sci-Fi]

I feel your pain slap, I don't trust people either and the last person (a woman coincidentally) tried to convince me I could trust her and she'd never do anything to hurt me...well guess what? She did. But it's all on you, you're the shy one and the one who is too timid to go strike up a conversation, I'm the same way. There are women who will make the first move but a lot like it when the guy does. It makes them feel good about themselves. The gay comments are not nice, sometimes people don't realize just how much those kind of remarks can affect a person.

 

[slappopkarl]

Lol would my life possibly be easier if I found men attractive?

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Learn how to be womenS drug of chioce....Be her Dr. Love N Dr .feel good.lol

Romance turns her on..
You also gatta get her off..seriously sexually get her.

Both od these areas require regular maintenace. Its not that complicate.
.
Do reserch on both subject matters and apply them.

.

---

Heres the deal dude....
Francis..a woman Ive dating..We have relationships issues..

She calls me and wanna have Break up sex with me...She had also falling in love with me...but fell out of love with me. Shes going through narely withdraws...

---

Theres PUA...then theres Players

 

[slappopkarl]

Learn how to be womenS drug of chioce....Be her Dr. Love N Dr .feel good.lol

Romance turns her on..
You also gatta get her off..seriously sexually get her.

Both od these areas require regular maintenace. Its not that complicate.
.
Do reserch on both subject matters and apply them.

.

---

Heres the deal dude....
Francis..a woman Ive dating..We have relationships issues..

She calls me and wanna have Break up sex with me...She had also falling in love with me...but fell out of love with me. Shes going through narely withdraws...

---

Theres PUA...then theres Players

---

---

erm I don't quite understand...dumb it down

 

[Sci-Fi]

Lol would my life possibly be easier if I found men attractive?

LOL

Well, not to sound stereotypical but you'd probably find even more drama