How old were you when kisses stopped being meaningful?

[sinisterplague]

For me it was not too long ago. Last girl I kissed, I knew at the time it would probably mean nothing, and was correct. But basically it was after my last relationship.
The college party scene is just too tempting for even the more innocent girls I suppose. Once she and her friends started talking about kissing 3 guys in one night and doing "anything they want with them" because "well...its different in college, you meet so many people!" that sort of did it for me. I mean, I don't really care if people feel like ******* around or making out with as many people in one night as possible because they're in party mode or whatever, their lives. But then the whole idea of a kiss being "magical" or "meaningful" or there being a special "connection" seems absolutely laughable at best. Or nauseating, depending on my mood.

But anyways, that sort of romanticism I left behind in the same place I left behind the idea that I will be in a famous band one day. I imagine most people figured that out at an earlier age than I did, but oh well, I learned.

So how old were you all when kissing became nothing but going through the motions, and basically meaningless? You can be honest, I'm pretty sure your current partners will not read this.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Since I don't kiss random people, and haven't kissed many at all, they still mean something to me. And I hope they always do, especially with someone I love and love to be around.

 

[EveWasFramed]

I think there are two kinds of kisses.
There's the kind that you experience when you really care for a person and are expressing it via the melding of lips and tongues, usually with soft caresses and a warm embrace...
And then there's kind that is more sexual in nature. The kind that makes your heart feel like it's about to beat right out of your chest, and it's intense, hot, frantic.....

Somtimes though...you get lucky and have them both, all wrapped in one. I think all kisses have a "meaning" but some mean more than others. I'm a romantic. If I couldn't have both, I'd choose the former over the latter.

 

[Badjedidude]

Same for me, Nills.

Kisses mean a lot to me. Not even my old mommy gets kisses everytime I see her, and I loves her. I'm not the kinda guy who likes the side-cheek kissy thing when greeting people, either....though I've done it when I had to.

As far as romance...it does mean a lot to me. I'll agree that a kiss isn't some magical thing that transports me to another dimension or something....but I enjoy kissing, and only with a girl whom I'm very close to. With that said, there is a range of different kisses used for different reasons. For instance, the kiss one has with a woman directly after proposing to her will indeed be more meaningful and emotional than, say, a peck on the lips as a goodbye in the morning.

However, I think that every type of kiss that one can have with their partner is meaningful to some degree, and should be felt and enjoyed as such.

I've never kissed someone and had the feeling that I was "going through the motions"....so I think it's kinda sad that you feel like that, sinisterplague. It means that you're missing out on something...and maybe trying to convince yourself that what you feel is normal. Sorry, man.

----Steve

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

19

 

[cheaptrickfan]

It's not that kisses lose their meaning, it's that they lose their place in that relationship. Kisses became perfunctory for me in the waning years of my marriage. They were a necessary component of sex, but they were passionless, just a means of advancing to a certain point in the process. I was about 34, I'd say.

But now at 41, I can say that I know that the wonderful knee-melting power of the kiss is still there. I've felt it fleetingly in a few of the post-marriage relationships I've had.

Life has not killed the romantic in me yet. There's still a heart beating there.

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

It's not that kisses lose their meaning, it's that they lose their place in that relationship. Kisses became perfunctory for me in the waning years of my marriage. They were a necessary component of sex, but they were passionless, just a eans of advancing to a certain point in the process. I was about 34, I'd say.

But now at 41, I can say that I know that the wonderful knee-melting power of the kiss is still there. I've felt it fleetingly in a few of the post-marriage relationships I've had.

Life has not killed the romantic in my yet. There's still a heart beating there.

aw, even grammar bitches have hearts. Good to know.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

aw, even grammar bitches have hearts. Good to know.

Mmm-hmm. However, as Jane Austen would say (honeysuckle, don't even ask, I am way random this morning), don't think you can trespass on my good nature. I'll still kick your grammatical ass if need be.

 

[mintymint]

I love me some serious smooching Hasn't gotten old yet. I'll be sad when it does...

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Hasn't lost it's tenderness and sweetness yet.

 

[sinisterplague]

Pfft. romancefags.

Let me guess, is the key not asking too many questions? Would make sense, I'm sure its much easier to convince to yourself a kiss is special when you don't know where that mouth has been.
Then again...how many of you are in college? I guess i could be different when not everyone your age kisses so many people in such short time periods.

 

[antifortress]

A kiss (in singular) was one of the most wonderful experiences in my life. This was nearly 8 years ago. I'd say it would be just as meaningful if it ever happens again...

-a

 

[nerdygirl]

Kisses stop being meaningful? Geeze. That's sad. Call me old-fashioned, but for me, a kiss is not insignificant.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

Pfft. romancefags.

Nice. You seem to enjoy tossing around permutations of "fag" as a pejorative: "romancefags" "newfags." Classy.

Let me guess, is the key not asking too many questions? Would make sense, I'm sure its much easier to convince to yourself a kiss is special when you don't know where that mouth has been.

Don't jump to conclusions about other people's behavior. You know nothing about the personal lives of other posters here. Just because our opinions may not jibe with yours there's no need to be offensive.

Then again...how many of you are in college? I guess i could be different when not everyone your age kisses so many people in such short time periods.

Now that just smacks of sour grapes.

 

[Steel]

I still love the kissing.

 

[Badjedidude]

sinisterplague = non-romancefag.

Then again...how many of you are in college? I guess i could be different when not everyone your age kisses so many people in such short time periods.

I'm in college, and I'm careful to get a girl that isn't a slut....and I don't really care how many people a girl has kissed before she's kissed me. I'm fairly certain that I've probably kissed a girl who's given another dude oral sex before at some point in her life...but so what? If you worry about that honeysuckle then you're just gonna drive yourself crazy.

I think you're making some astoundingly sweeping generalizations about college women, sinisterplague. You sound bitter about it, too. Here's a hint: NOT EVERY GIRL IN COLLEGE IS A PARTY-WHORE. Sure, some freshies do it because the college experience is "new and liberating" for them...but they settle down eventually.

Instead of railing against kissing or college women, why don't you stop going to clubs and start looking around for the type of college girl that doesn't party a lot? Like the bookworms...girls in the library or computer labs...girls who are actually in college to STUDY and get a degree. You might have better luck there.

----Steve

 

[sinisterplague]

sinisterplague = non-romancefag.

Instead of railing against kissing or college women, why don't you stop going to clubs and start looking around for the type of college girl that doesn't party a lot? Like the bookworms...girls in the library or computer labs...girls who are actually in college to STUDY and get a degree. You might have better luck there.

----Steve

Sorta did that already. She was a total non party girl. Then she had her first year of college.

And honestly, I know not every girl does that in college, but kissing has sort of become part of the "getting to know you" process rather than an expression of affection. Been kissed quite a few times and been told they weren't interested later that night. I mean, sure, kisses are still expressions of affection and all that, the expression just sort of becomes meaningless when you don't even have to really like someone to kiss them.

---

Nice. You seem to enjoy tossing around permutations of "fag" as a pejorative: "romancefags" "newfags." Classy.

If whining about political correctness gives you a sense of moral and intellectual superiority, then more power to ya. But adding "fag" at the end of certain nouns and adjectives is just an internet thing like "n00b" "lol" and intentionally awful grammar. It is not meant as an insult.

Don't jump to conclusions about other people's behavior. You know nothing about the personal lives of other posters here. Just because our opinions may not jibe with yours there's no need to be offensive.

Wrong. That hypothesis (obviously not a conclusion, because conclusions do not follow "let me guess") was based off personal experience, not assumptions of other posters. Looks like you are the one jumping to conclusions.

Now that just smacks of sour grapes.

Okay. This thread wasn't supposed to come across as bitter, I just thought these sort of revelations were more universal. Guess I was wrong.

 

[Steel]

I think enough people find the word "fag" offensive that you should refrain from using it in the casual manner in which you do. I will tell you for nothing that it weakens your opinions considerably.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

But adding "fag" at the end of certain nouns and adjectives is just an internet thing like "n00b" "lol" and intentionally awful grammar. It is not meant as an insult.

Please. You're the first person I've ever seen at this forum add a "fag" tag to the end of words. It's not at all the same as text/forum-speak. At least own your obnoxiousness if nothing else.

Don't jump to conclusions about other people's behavior. You know nothing about the personal lives of other posters here. Just because our opinions may not jibe with yours there's no need to be offensive.

Wrong. That hypothesis (obviously not a conclusion, because conclusions do not follow "let me guess") was based off personal experience, not assumptions of other posters. Looks like you are the one jumping to conclusions.

O RLY? Then perhaps you ought to be more careful in how you phrase things because this:

Let me guess, is the key not asking too many questions? Would make sense, I'm sure its much easier to convince to yourself a kiss is special when you don't know where that mouth has been.

...in context of the rest of your post (and considering the tone of your other posts) certainly came across as you talking about how others were acting. If you meant you, then change the pronoun. That grammar tip is free, because you're new here and, at heart, I'm basically a nice person.

Now that just smacks of sour grapes.

Okay. This thread wasn't supposed to come across as bitter, I just thought these sort of revelations were more universal. Guess I was wrong.

Again, as a forum veteran like yourself would know, it's all in how you phrase things. So far your posts come across as either obnoxiously smart-alecky or deliberately provocative, but that's JMO.

 

[Badjedidude]

Quick question just for the sake of context, sinisterplague: Are you in college? And at what level? Freshie? Soph? What?

----Steve