How the hell do you break free

[hitch1983]

as the headline says, how do you do it?

Ive tried allsorts to breakdown these walls of isolation.

church, gym classes all sorts... and whilst ive improved my social network to an extent that i know more people, when it comes to the crunch, im still spending every night alone.

i love summer and the sun, but this is when it tortures the most. all these people going about with there lives and im stuck at home writing these sad posts.

what can i do?

 

[TheRealCallie]

Why don't you go out by yourself? Pick a place, go have fun, become a "regular" and people will start expecting to see you there.
What do you want to do?

 

[sothatwasmylife]

as the headline says, how do you do it?

Ive tried allsorts to breakdown these walls of isolation.

church, gym classes all sorts... and whilst ive improved my social network to an extent that i know more people, when it comes to the crunch, im still spending every night alone.

i love summer and the sun, but this is when it tortures the most. all these people going about with there lives and im stuck at home writing these sad posts.

what can i do?

I wish I could offer a solution to that...I guess many people have positive social interaction with members of their own family which lends itself to forrming links with others outwith the family circle ...for those without family or without family they are able to positively interact with..it seems as if there is no base to reach out from with any degree of ease

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

Walk out the door and show yourself that you aren't stuck.

 

[Bluey]

Summer time is worse for me. (Apart from Christmas, God I hate Christmas) But yea in summer the days get longer and everyone seems to be out having a good time.
I to joined a gym and you do meet people there. But a gym is only a place you spend about an hour at.
It has helped to make me to feel better tho. But like the OP I am still spending every evening alone.

I did re-activate my FB a wile ago and that actually did help amazingly. I have has a result of that been invited to more stuff like birthday parties and a wedding. So that can help. All tho it did not make me feel so popular when I sat for most of the night at the wedding on my own.
But then I just kept telling myself that I would only be sat at home alone anyway.

Wish I had some useful things to tell you but just mainly wonted to say I sympathise with you.

 

[dd11]

My advice is to embrace your life as it is today. Find things that give you joy and pleasure. In the summer, start hiking through the woods. Get a plant, tree and bird book. Educate yourself in the forest. It is very pleasing to hike trails and observe nature. Open yourself up to experiences. And, yes go do them alone. I think that as you get busy embracing life, then these things start to work themselves out. If you are going to social events trying to make friends, that doesn't seem to work. At least it never did for me. It seems that people can sense that desperation or something. When i stopped trying, it got easier. People want to engage with people who are passionate about life and have enthusiasm for things. Find things that inspire you and get enthused.

 

[Bluey]

If you are going to social events trying to make friends, that doesn't seem to work. At least it never did for me. It seems that people can sense that desperation or something. When i stopped trying, it got easier. People want to engage with people who are passionate about life and have enthusiasm for things. Find things that inspire you and get enthused.

I agree with this.
Its like if you try to hard you just come across has needy and someone that will cling. Like if you see a person like that you think I might try and get to know them but if I be friend them and then dont wont them around am going to have trouble getting them away from me nicely.
OK I rambled a bit there. But yea I never had much luck at social events or in nightclubs. The placers your supposed to meet people.

What I mostly agreed with was if you find things to do that you enjoy and then start doing them other people will want to join in.

Of course the trick is to actually find something that does inspire you, that is easier said then done.

 

[coltcrimson]

Have you ever thought about volunteering? I've volunteered for the community kitchen and I have met some awesome people doing that. It's good for you socially, and you're helping other people. The other people on the thread have made some excellent points too.

Since its summer has you considered joining a biking club, or doing the local races?

 

[handheart]

Well you dont must expect that someone will knock on you door and ask you to get out .You must get out your confort zone and ask girls to out you must do this for much time you will get many failures but eventualy you will succed .The good things not come for free and easy in our lifes

 

[achillesfoot]

locate the cryptic algorithm hidden within the deepest reaches of our universe necessary to metaphysically connect with another living being