How was your 2021?

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My 2021 has been a real mixture. Problems with the house continued, and brought more problems with legal representatives, Ombudsmen and MP's. That has been the low points.

My ex finally drank herself into intensive care, where I think she has been since March. A better person might feel sympathy, empathy, some sorrow. Nope, not I. Vindication was celebrated.

Summer was good, travel was limited to Wales, but I really enjoyed it. Done a couple of camping trips, lots of walking and exploring. Mainly, mindspace from myself.

So, lots of stress, some unexpected joys, and lots of summery escapes from myself. 2021 has flown by so quickly.
 
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So, lots of stress, some unexpected joys, and lots of summery escapes from myself. 2021 has flown by so quickly.
That feels like traveling in a car with no breaks. Irrationally funny at times but mainly dangerous.

Btw, Wales is beautiful. Perfectly fine for holidays. I assume you tend to go north? Because of the location, I end up in Brecons and Gower.
 
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My 2021 started already low after severe burn-out several months earlier. On top, in early January, my own share of Covid brought me to my knees. I used to be very active. Eleven months after, the illness still casts its shadow. These two left me out of balance, out of place for the whole year.

On a positive note, I had to rethink my choices, priorities and limitations. That's always a good thing, whatever the outcomes. I'm still fine after all.
 
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For the most part, my year was a good one. I felt a lot more love for life, even on the bad days. My workplace really expanded, and I feel a lot of pride for my part in that.

Recovery wise, I feel stronger than ever. Certainly more reasonable and clear thinking.

Socially, I'm still crap. But it seems like many around me are too. We're all kind of weird and seem to be connecting, so there's that.

I feel a bit overwhelmed by everything that surrounds the end of the year, but I am looking forward to next.
 
To be honest, it wasn't that great. I spent a lot of it feeling overwhelmed.

We had a few family health issues that were pretty scary. And even getting through those, it's hard seeing loved ones get really old and not be the version of themselves that I remember. It's like...even if we solve our immediate problems, we're still not getting any younger, and that's one reason it's hard for me to look forward to anything. It makes me feel like our "good old days" are over, and I regret that I didn't do those days right when I had the chance.

Family money problems also got worse - I keep thinking, it's already bad, it was never good to begin with, it can't get any worse, right? Nope. It only reinforces that, while I don't know how I want to live, I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that what we did, doesn't work. It's not just a difference of opinion in priorities, opinions, and lifestyle - it's actually wrong, it's dysfunctional. And I don't want to live like this for the rest of my life. I just don't know how to escape in a way that actually works for me.

Also, it's hard for me to focus on just trying to learn a skill to make money, because even if I did, I still have to figure out how to have a personality that others would want to get emotionally close to, that others would want to connect with on a deep enough level for a romantic relationship. I still don't feel like I'd be good enough to be significant or meaningful enough to anyone, I wouldn't have the right thoughts, wouldn't say the right things, wouldn't do the right things, wouldn't come up with the right things or see things in the right way that they're looking for. The right material still wouldn't just naturally occur to me. I'd still fall emotionally flat. It would be hard for me to just work, even if it paid well, because I still wouldn't know what to do to get into a romantic relationship. I still wouldn't feel in control of that problem and it would bother me a lot.

This is kind of what I was getting at before - it's hard for me to really have fun, or be that interested in anything, when my singledom problem is ongoing, because as long as it's ongoing, nothing really feels that great. But it's a catch-22, because if I'm not having fun or not interested in anything, don't care about anything, then I'm not going to give off the right kind of energy for someone to want to grow close to me. I don't know.

I spent a lot of time thinking through my problems, going over my life and trying to articulate them better and figure out exactly what is wrong and why and what I can do to fix it. I think I've figured out the "what is wrong and why" part, but the "how to fix it" part, I still don't know.

Unfortunately I didn't really learn a lot of fun things or increase my skill at anything cool, so I withdrew from talking to people as I didn't feel like I had anything that interesting to say, or much in the way of new ideas or progress at anything, and didn't want to screw up my impression with them by coming off as weak or boring, and written off as "no chemistry"/"incompatible"/"no personality". I still don't know how to take up a conversational tone, a talking style, that makes the right impression with someone that I'm their kind of person. I became very anxious about that because part of the "thinking through my problems" thing is that I've noticed that I really only have a willingness to be friendly, and some common interests that I have a surface-level knowledge of. I don't really have much else that would appeal to anyone or make me seem interesting and attractive. But I don't know what I should try to get, to get those things. Or where to look for them.

The only real plus is that I was fairly consistent with my fitness habit. I know I lost weight and my waistline went down, so at least I look a little better, and at least I made real, measurable progress in something I worked on - at least my effort towards something, actually worked. So, there's that.
 
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It's like...even if we solve our immediate problems, we're still not getting any younger, and that's one reason it's hard for me to look forward to anything. It makes me feel like our "good old days" are over, and I regret that I didn't do those days right when I had the chance.
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Sometimes, I feel the same. It's true that some good old days are certainly over, maybe even most of them, but there are still some ahead.

My mum often says that she's too old to do something. There is always this topic of living in a small town and not driving. She regrets she didn't get a driving licence 10 years earlier. I remember her saying the same 10, 15, 20 years ago. She's always 10 years too old.

Contrary to what you may think I think you are an interesting person.
 
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To be honest, it wasn't that great. I spent a lot of it feeling overwhelmed.

We had a few family health issues that were pretty scary. And even getting through those, it's hard seeing loved ones get really old and not be the version of themselves that I remember. It's like...even if we solve our immediate problems, we're still not getting any younger, and that's one reason it's hard for me to look forward to anything. It makes me feel like our "good old days" are over, and I regret that I didn't do those days right when I had the chance.

Family money problems also got worse - I keep thinking, it's already bad, it was never good to begin with, it can't get any worse, right? Nope. It only reinforces that, while I don't know how I want to live, I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that what we did, doesn't work. It's not just a difference of opinion in priorities, opinions, and lifestyle - it's actually wrong, it's dysfunctional. And I don't want to live like this for the rest of my life. I just don't know how to escape in a way that actually works for me.

Also, it's hard for me to focus on just trying to learn a skill to make money, because even if I did, I still have to figure out how to have a personality that others would want to get emotionally close to, that others would want to connect with on a deep enough level for a romantic relationship. I still don't feel like I'd be good enough to be significant or meaningful enough to anyone, I wouldn't have the right thoughts, wouldn't say the right things, wouldn't do the right things, wouldn't come up with the right things or see things in the right way that they're looking for. The right material still wouldn't just naturally occur to me. I'd still fall emotionally flat. It would be hard for me to just work, even if it paid well, because I still wouldn't know what to do to get into a romantic relationship. I still wouldn't feel in control of that problem and it would bother me a lot.

This is kind of what I was getting at before - it's hard for me to really have fun, or be that interested in anything, when my singledom problem is ongoing, because as long as it's ongoing, nothing really feels that great. But it's a catch-22, because if I'm not having fun or not interested in anything, don't care about anything, then I'm not going to give off the right kind of energy for someone to want to grow close to me. I don't know.

I spent a lot of time thinking through my problems, going over my life and trying to articulate them better and figure out exactly what is wrong and why and what I can do to fix it. I think I've figured out the "what is wrong and why" part, but the "how to fix it" part, I still don't know.

Unfortunately I didn't really learn a lot of fun things or increase my skill at anything cool, so I withdrew from talking to people as I didn't feel like I had anything that interesting to say, or much in the way of new ideas or progress at anything, and didn't want to screw up my impression with them by coming off as weak or boring, and written off as "no chemistry"/"incompatible"/"no personality". I still don't know how to take up a conversational tone, a talking style, that makes the right impression with someone that I'm their kind of person. I became very anxious about that because part of the "thinking through my problems" thing is that I've noticed that I really only have a willingness to be friendly, and some common interests that I have a surface-level knowledge of. I don't really have much else that would appeal to anyone or make me seem interesting and attractive. But I don't know what I should try to get, to get those things. Or where to look for them.

The only real plus is that I was fairly consistent with my fitness habit. I know I lost weight and my waistline went down, so at least I look a little better, and at least I made real, measurable progress in something I worked on - at least my effort towards something, actually worked. So, there's that.
You really should talk to people. No, not therapy, counselling or medical. There's a very insightful and articulate person within you. You should find a place where you can actually verbally express yourself amongst others of a similar ilk.
 
The only real plus is that I was fairly consistent with my fitness habit. I know I lost weight and my waistline went down, so at least I look a little better, and at least I made real, measurable progress in something I worked on - at least my effort towards something, actually worked. So, there's that.
That's a positive man, most people quit as they tend to look at how far they still have to go instead of how far they have come. But it's a series of small wins that can give us the most significant success.

I think you actually have a lot going for you, you're intelligent, articulate, have a grand sense of humour and a real empathy for others. That's just what I've picked up from reading your posts.
 
One of my worst years. My biological mother got Covid and died. She was probably the only person that actually cared about me. My other mother lives with my sister. I found out my sister has been abusive towards my mom. My sister had my mom write me and my family out of the will. I reported to APS but for some reason they placed my mother back with my sister, against my mother's wishes and against the recommendations of half a dozen doctors and other medical professionals.

I got hurt at work four years ago and I'm still fighting it. It sucks being unable to work. It also sucks being hurt to the point that you are severely limited in every possible activity. I can't read without getting headaches. I always feel dizzy and nauseous. I was throwing up at my mother's funeral.
 
I never really expected my year to turn out this way. started normal, was working but due to covid i stopped. then met some friends who were into drugs. spent lots of nights and money on strip clubs which was fun. crazy honeysuckle happened between my friend and his girlfriend. then i got so high i comitted sexual harassment and was arrested. never thought id be arrested. now im here under house arrest.
 
For me 2021 was a roller coaster. I don't like roller coasters.

I had some great things happen, and some mentally draining things happen. I temporarily moved to a place I hate, but at the same time I was able to re-kindle old relationships with old friends/relatives that I have missed. I left a job with a horrible boss to another job with multiple horrible bosses (and they are also dismissive of covid here). And then there's the up and down relationship I've been in that I will just leave at that. There's more, but I just want a boring, mundane life where neighbors chat at the fence daily and look out for one another.
 
I wrote paragraphs about just why this year has been so bad, but I don't think I feel like posting it anymore. Let's just say it's the worst year I have had since 2006 and leave it at that. Hopefully next year will be better.
 
Nothing outstanding. But at least nothing bad.
For the first time in my life I asked for more money at work, my health wasn't as good as it could be(got chronic traumas), bought some new things, sold some things I didn't need anymore, found a good school for a kid, didn't learn some things I wanted to.
 
Pretty good this year.I had a great 43rd birthday this month.Parents are amazed I made it another year.Two years of raising my 2 nephews whom are 13 and 15.Taught them good knowing their dad is up in heaven looking down.Also on discovering themselves,oldest discovered he is a part time crossdresser back in September
 
I've had much worse. So far I've read 27 books, had a comic published in an academic textbook, passed two certification exams, learned some new technology and decided to finally stop writing reviews on Amazon, which I had done for 20 years. On a personal level, my marriage continued with no issues, but I made no new friends and have potentially lost one more who has grown slowly silent. As usual, my personal life went well and my personal life remained "stable." I have no trouble entertaining myself, but it would be nice to have more people to share experiences and thoughts with.
 

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