one lonely guy
Well-known member
This whole thread is so relevant to my current situation in a depression/anxiety support group.
First off, I'd say BlueRose's complaint of rudeness re sharing phone number during group session is virtually invalid. OTOH, much depends on the style of facilitation of the group, and believe me there are many styles, and there is a wide variety of group dynamics in different groups, and I've been to plenty.
Having myself found it rather difficult to make many personal connections within the group, I admit I share some of BlueRose's frustration, but showing it achieves nothing but further alienation and doesn't in any way validate the original complaint of rudeness.
You'll find such a wide variety of personalities, lifestyles, and specific forms and triggers of depression/anxiety, that getting 2 people together that click can be quite a breakthrough. One of the reasons I make fewer connections than most is that my particular anxiety is social anxiety with specific triggers and symptoms, and not many completely relate. I'm not entirely happy about making few connections, but don't (or at least try not to) feel bitter about those who do. It's completely counterproductive anyway.
If I can make one constructive suggestion to BlueRose:
Try another group in your area if you have one. That's what I've had to do until the current facilitation and/or group dynamics changes in the current one I attend. The attendees haven't changed in over a year, no new faces, no new issues, the atmosphere has become glib (like a social club) rather than seriously supportive, and the chances of making more new connections has dropped to near zero.
Facilitators (and hence the style in which groups are run) seem to have an average life of 1.5yr. My theory is that facilitators get burnt out.
You may need to adjust your attitude though.
First off, I'd say BlueRose's complaint of rudeness re sharing phone number during group session is virtually invalid. OTOH, much depends on the style of facilitation of the group, and believe me there are many styles, and there is a wide variety of group dynamics in different groups, and I've been to plenty.
Having myself found it rather difficult to make many personal connections within the group, I admit I share some of BlueRose's frustration, but showing it achieves nothing but further alienation and doesn't in any way validate the original complaint of rudeness.
You'll find such a wide variety of personalities, lifestyles, and specific forms and triggers of depression/anxiety, that getting 2 people together that click can be quite a breakthrough. One of the reasons I make fewer connections than most is that my particular anxiety is social anxiety with specific triggers and symptoms, and not many completely relate. I'm not entirely happy about making few connections, but don't (or at least try not to) feel bitter about those who do. It's completely counterproductive anyway.
If I can make one constructive suggestion to BlueRose:
Try another group in your area if you have one. That's what I've had to do until the current facilitation and/or group dynamics changes in the current one I attend. The attendees haven't changed in over a year, no new faces, no new issues, the atmosphere has become glib (like a social club) rather than seriously supportive, and the chances of making more new connections has dropped to near zero.
Facilitators (and hence the style in which groups are run) seem to have an average life of 1.5yr. My theory is that facilitators get burnt out.
You may need to adjust your attitude though.