[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]Can't really make friends because of my emotional baggage: [/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I don't really have any friends and with the friends I thought I had made I've realised they never really were friends and in fact I never really liked them at all. My issue that I think I 've always had is clinging onto a certain type of people and trying to befriend them because I know they're nice and they won't reject me. But in reality I don't like them at all, don't have fun with them or care about them. So basically they're not my friends. [/font][font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I act a certan way around them and mirror their behaviour[/font][font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif] and sometimes even act like I'm interested in things I'm not interested in. [/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I always leave these people that I befriend with a bad impression of me because eventually I stop contacting them and act like they don't exist and then they see the real me, realise I was lying and really end up hating me. As per the usual I end up feeling shite about myself and think there's something wrong with me. [/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]Maybe if I had been acting like my true self in the beginning then people wouldn't have ended up hurt. But the thing is, is that I don't think I will make friends with the kinds of people I vibe with. They tend to already have friends and I think they'll think I'm a loser. What to do, what to do? Can anyone relate? It's quite the dilemma but I 've been dealing with it for a while now so I'm kinda used to it. I want to fix it now![/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I don't really have any friends and with the friends I thought I had made I've realised they never really were friends and in fact I never really liked them at all. My issue that I think I 've always had is clinging onto a certain type of people and trying to befriend them because I know they're nice and they won't reject me. But in reality I don't like them at all, don't have fun with them or care about them. So basically they're not my friends. [/font][font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I act a certan way around them and mirror their behaviour[/font][font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif] and sometimes even act like I'm interested in things I'm not interested in. [/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]I always leave these people that I befriend with a bad impression of me because eventually I stop contacting them and act like they don't exist and then they see the real me, realise I was lying and really end up hating me. As per the usual I end up feeling shite about myself and think there's something wrong with me. [/font]
[font=Calibri, Tahoma, Geneva, sans-serif]Maybe if I had been acting like my true self in the beginning then people wouldn't have ended up hurt. But the thing is, is that I don't think I will make friends with the kinds of people I vibe with. They tend to already have friends and I think they'll think I'm a loser. What to do, what to do? Can anyone relate? It's quite the dilemma but I 've been dealing with it for a while now so I'm kinda used to it. I want to fix it now![/font]