Loneliness is literally killing me (and you too)

[VanillaCreme]

Why am I so adamant? Because I can be. And I don't believe it's true. You can think it's true all you want. No one's stopping you from thinking it is. But I don't. There's too many variables, even in studies, to claim that it's the only reason why they died. They could have had a sudden heart attack, a sudden stroke, anything... I don't believe it's true, and nothing you will say or try to prove will make me believe it is.

 

[Peaches]

I agree with VanillaCreme, lately there were all these terroristic studies, like http://www.igsb.org/news/psychologist-john-cacioppo-explains-why-loneliness-is-bad-for-your-health/
in fact, if you read the book, you will see that it is enough to have a dog to lower the death danger, or become a religious maniac and talk to god all the time, because it's the PERCEIVED loneliness that hurts. Anyway, when I read those studies I feel like yelling "screw you" and knocking on wood just in case. Like we aren't unhappy enough.

But, yeah, if that is the case, if the article is right and there is a concrete danger, it is our job and responsibility to go out of our way to try and be a bit more happy, that includes putting us in situations where other (friendly) people are.

 

[Felix]

In short term, lonliness has given me a better health this year. Since I'm not going to crowded places and/or using public transport often, I haven't cought a cold or any other disease this year. Everyone's been sick but me because I've been safe in my hole ^^

Ok, seriously, I have my doubts with this study too. But it's probably more healthy to be around people, I don't need any studies to know that.

 

[Dabnis_Brickey]

Why am I so adamant? Because I can be. And I don't believe it's true. You can think it's true all you want. No one's stopping you from thinking it is. But I don't. There's too many variables, even in studies, to claim that it's the only reason why they died. They could have had a sudden heart attack, a sudden stroke, anything... I don't believe it's true, and nothing you will say or try to prove will make me believe it is.

I am sorry to sound like an *******...
Again, no one is stating that loneliness is the only reason a person died. In fact, loneliness in and of itself has likely not cause many deaths. Loneliness shortens lives. It isn't something that you can usually point to as a cause of death. It is something, however, that has been conclusively been shown to harm health.

This "I don't believe it so therefore it isn't true" stuff sounds silly to me.

I agree with VanillaCreme, lately there were all these terroristic studies, like http://www.igsb.org/news/psychologist-john-cacioppo-explains-why-loneliness-is-bad-for-your-health/
in fact, if you read the book, you will see that it is enough to have a dog to lower the death danger, or become a religious maniac and talk to god all the time, because it's the PERCEIVED loneliness that hurts. Anyway, when I read those studies I feel like yelling "screw you" and knocking on wood just in case. Like we aren't unhappy enough.

But, yeah, if that is the case, if the article is right and there is a concrete danger, it is our job and responsibility to go out of our way to try and be a bit more happy, that includes putting us in situations where other (friendly) people are.

If you have a dog, I would say you aren't lonely - or not nearly as much as someone without. Not only are dogs themselves friendly and thus worthy companions, it seems like a lot of people project human like qualities to their pets which I am sure helps. Same with God. If you believe that God is listening to you and is actually your friend, that will likely decrease your loneliness.

The brain, as complex as it is, can easily be tricked.

 

[VanillaCreme]

It's not true to me. It can be true to you or to anyone else. I'm not saying being alone is the only reason why, and I'm not saying that it's not true at all because I believe it not to be. Pay attention to the words that are said. It can easily be mistaken as being true, because like I said there are so many variables. Believe me, I know how someone feeling all alone can affect them. Like I said, my mom has felt like she was alone, and I do believe that it made her worse off, because many people are affected by how their mind reacts to things.

No doubt that being alone or feeling lonely can truly affect someone. But does it really make the life span shorter? I don't think so. As far as that studies go, did they look at all the different variables? In the half that weren't isolated, none of them died? In the half that were isolated, did they pick people with conditions that limited their time regardless? Did any of them die of causes that had nothing to do with actually being alone, such as cardiac arrests or strokes?

And when you say things like:

The brain, as complex as it is, can easily be tricked.

It makes me wonder why do you feel the need to defend against someone's thought on a topic. That basically says the same thing that I've said, which you've seem to become flustered over. My opinions are not law, rule, or fact, and I'm not claiming them to be so. I was just simply stating what I thought on the matter.

 

[ardour]

urgggh... it's not as though loneliness is 'the cause'. Long-term anxiety supposedly increase a person's susceptibility to life-threatening illnesses.

So if you want to yell at society and blame everyone for not wanting you as a friend or spouse, instead of "you're killing me", better to say "you're continual rejection could potentially be raising my risk of cancer or heart disease in later life. Shame on you".

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

It definitely makes me depressed and wonder how I'm going to get through the next 50+ years. I want to kiss a girl so badly.

 

[Alonewith2cats]

I would say loneliness can eventually kill a person but not right away. Now, I'm 39 years old. When I think about the lifestyle I live, alone with 2 cats and having to live without any affection from another human being on most days, I can do it for a long time for the reason that I believe that in the future my lifestyle will change, it hopefully won't be like this forever and for the rest of my life, and there are of course positive benefits to being single, lots of freedom to do whatever I want, whenever I want without having to answer to anyone etc. But if 10 to 20 years go by and there is no change, when I'm in my 50s or 60s, I may not give up by age 50 but the more time goes by the closer I would become to this state, then at that point I'm going to want to swallow some pills and go to sleep forever. But this is by no means a suicide threat because I'm talking 10 to 20 years from now and that's only if there is no change.

 

[SugarandCyanide]

I'm lonely and alone because no one likes fat girls. I'd like to have a girlfriend, but that will never happen unless I'm skinny.

 

[SomeoneSomewhere]

I was really lonely last night and couldn't sleep at about 3 so I started looking up stuff. Here's a similar article that I found:

http://www.newrepublic.com/article/113176/science-loneliness-how-isolation-can-kill-you

It's a good read so I recommend reading every part carefully.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I was really lonely last night and couldn't sleep at about 3 so I started looking up stuff. Here's a similar article that I found:

http://www.newrepublic.com/article/113176/science-loneliness-how-isolation-can-kill-you

It's a good read so I recommend reading every part carefully.

You should repost that in the Essential articles section, so everyone can read it. That is marvelous and brilliant.

And oh so true. Social isolation can make you sick, and even kill you. And the thing about rejection is exactly why I don't ask out girls anymore...it's like being punched in the face.

 

[SomeoneSomewhere]

You should repost that in the Essential articles section, so everyone can read it. That is marvelous and brilliant.

And oh so true. Social isolation can make you sick, and even kill you. And the thing about rejection is exactly why I don't ask out girls anymore...it's like being punched in the face.

Alright, sure, consider it done.

For me, the meaning of the article goes way deeper than that and the most important part would be the last few sections, in particular, starting with the macaques experiment (I knew about it before but I realized how important it is now).

I think I know now why I've always felt different and how I've never learned to interpret or even read the simplest of social cues and the people I wanted to understand. It comes naturally, I guess.

Realizing that something is wrong with me is the first step to changing that. I feel a certain sense of peace with myself now after reading this so this could potentially be a life-altering article for me.