losing virginity with an escort?

[TheRealCallie]

Yes, it makes a lot of sense. I understand that women suffer from rejection too but there is no shaming on them. Actually a woman can mock a man in pubblic way easier than a man. The "you are beatiful even if you weight 220 pounds " movement have forgotten that men are often shamed too for something that cannot be changed like height and size, If i call a woman a fat ***** i'm definetly a monster who doesn't deserve to live, but if a woman call me little willy thats perfectly fine, nobody cares if the guy in question is right, wrong, no he is guilty  because his dick is small so we can make fun of him. 

Dont misunderstand me, I hate men that shame women, here i'm just saying how things work

Um, no, women have TONS of issues with what men say about them. You obviously don't realize that because you're too stuck on your "men have it so horrible" trip.

Is not even the burden of good sex. To hurt a male you just have to say something about his dick, he really cannot say anything to talk back. ****, while writing this i'm finding that i'm giving a bad immage of myself. Ultimately i will accept this, thing just are in this way, i cant change anything 

 
Again, no. If your feelings get hurt because someone says something about your dick, that's entirely on you if you let that bother you. That's true with anything, whether you have a small dick, a big dick or two dicks....or for women, if you are a fat ***** or a toothpick whore or whatever.
It's obvious that you need to accept you don't have a porn star dick and likely never will, but that doesn't mean you have a SMALL dick. It's not how big you are, it's whether or not you know how to use it.

Is hard to belive with all the porn i have seen. Well, I guess that not all the girls outside here have 10cm wide vaginas lol my sexual experience with women is limited to porn, i guess that this had a big impact on my insecurities 

You definitely need to stop watching porn or at least stop equating it to the average person. Not everyone can make it in the porn industry.
 

At least he is confident in himself

That is your problem right there. You aren't confident. You care what everyone else thinks. Stop doing that.

And before anyone says it, I DID NOT SAY IT WAS EASY OR COULD HAPPEN OVERNIGHT.

 

[user 139760]

Richard_39I actually knew a guy who was VERY well endowed. He was lonely as well. Told me when he dropped his pants, women would gasp and literally be fearful. He had maybe 5 girlfriends, all of them stopped in the middle because it hurt to much. He was ultimately rejected for it.
[quote pid='863708' dateline='1515678144']

Haven't heard from him in years, but that made me understand that being well endowed by nature isn't necessarily a blessing. It's an ensemble to be a happy couple, not just tied to sexual performances.

At least he is confident in himself
[/quote]

You would think, actually. But no. He considered himself to be an innadequate potential partner because of his size. He actually told me he was looking into medical solutions to reduce it. But I got no news, it was a long time ago.
It's just an example for one of both extremes (too big or too small). I personally think we put way too much anxiety in looking at our junk in the mirror and feeling inadequate or not. But then again, I do believe it comes with being a man; most, if not all of us have felt this way at least once in our lives, we just don't chat about it, even in front of a beer lol. It's not like your concerns are to be minimized or tossed out as "not normal", they very much are.

When you find the right person, it won't really matter to her one way or another. It's just that to me, first time should be special, at least more so than green bills being exchanged. Like I said before though, it's your call, I didn't write the above for you specifically, just because it's kind of the theme of the thread ;-)
You have to make that decision to yourself and whatever it may be, it'll be yours and yours alone. It should be respected.

 

[DarkSelene]

Is hard to belive with all the porn i have seen. Well, I guess that not all the girls outside here have 10cm wide vaginas lol my sexual experience with women is limited to porn, i guess that this had a big impact on my insecurities 

I wouldn't tell you to stop watching porn, but definitely stop taking it as reality. That's not even how sex works 80% of the time (not even with an escort), and trying to perform like one of those guys is probably why you're feeling so much pressure. I'm pretty sure anyone I know would prefer something like your size way better than a gigantic thing poking their uterus. Seriously, sex is so much fun! You could be thinking about how to make the other person have a wonderful time, how great it'll be listening to them moan because of what you're doing... instead of being this much on your head about your size that is basically average!
Like I said in my first post, if you think that paying someone will help you get the pressure off -- do it. I have a friend that lost his virginity with a hooker when he was 18. He said it was super chill, she wasn't faking like they do in porn... she was actually trying to make him have a great first time because she saw that he was nervous. They even did it twice because his first time was so quick, I'm sure he paid for just an hour.

Look, I can come here and tell you that sex is not that big of a deal, that once you have it things will feel very natural and in the moment you and your partner will know what to do. That's true, but doesn't help someone who never went through that experience. I can also understand that nowadays after a certain age it becomes even weird being a virgin, unless you're doing it for religious reasons, but you don't have to actually mention that to the person you have sex with... especially if it's a pick up in a bar or something like that. Maybe you'll be terrible at it but casual, drunk sex with a stranger will always be kinda indifferent... I doubt anyone would be expecting much. Plus the alcohol really helps with the being nervous thing.

Anyways, I wish you good luck on whatever you choose/try to do. (Be safe!)

P.s.: I'm a romantic and usually would be the first person to tell you to wait for someone you really like and make it special... but seeing that you're so insecure, I think doing it with someone you don't care that much about would be best. Plus, it's not like you're ruined to anyone else -- you'll have a long time to find the person you really care about and have a special time with them, losing your virginity with someone forgettable won't change that (If sex is not a big deal afterwards, first time also shouldn't be).

 

[kamya]

 

[Xpendable]

The three panels simplicity. Pretty accurate.

 

[ardour]

At 23 (according to his profile) I think we can assume the OP has a good idea about what his options are by now. Unless you're better than above average looking sex without emotional ties isn't any easier to find than a long term relationship. Also, bars... no, that's a misconception. Where I am it's mainly people getting a few drinks after work. Everyone's in groups. You don't roll up to strange women in a bar and try it on unless you want to be asked to leave. I think this is mainly limited to Tinder, where it's all to do with a photo.

 

[DarkSelene]

He says he's good looking, though...

 

[Xpendable]

People hook up in bars all the time.

 

[ardour]

Not where I live.

 

[Serenia]

This is generalised.  I would not judge a potential date based on him being a virgin at all.

 

[Xpendable]

So men thinking a woman with many partners is a slut is also generalized?

 

[Serenia]

So men thinking a woman with many partners is a slut is also generalized?

No one thinks the same thing...

Some men don't call women sluts.

Some women don't call men sluts either.

Some men don't judge women on their virginity.

Some women don't judge men on their virginity.

Each person has their own opinions, and until you give them your time you won't know.

If you have only ever met people with these attitudes I am sorry for you, you want to widen your social circle.

 

[Xpendable]

So men thinking a woman with many partners is a slut is also generalized?

No one thinks the same thing...

Some men don't call women sluts.

Some women don't call men sluts either.

Some men don't judge women on their virginity.

Some women don't judge men on their virginity.

Each person has their own opinions, and until you give them your time you won't know.

If you have only ever met people with these attitudes I am sorry for you, you want to widen your social circle.

Is not MY experience that made that comic or how the social consciousness agrees with it. I could tell you that you need to widen your social circle too because is not only me who knows these judgemental people are in the majority, but wherever you go it is a common sentiment. The fact that some people (of which you don't know many) do not share this opinion, doesn't mean that in the vast world population this shaming doesn't exist or it is scarce. I assure you are not and it has nothing to do with how many people I or you get to know.

 

[Serenia]

So men thinking a woman with many partners is a slut is also generalized?

No one thinks the same thing...

Some men don't call women sluts.

Some women don't call men sluts either.

Some men don't judge women on their virginity.

Some women don't judge men on their virginity.

Each person has their own opinions, and until you give them your time you won't know.

If you have only ever met people with these attitudes I am sorry for you, you want to widen your social circle.

Is not MY experience that made that comic or how the social consciousness agrees with it. I could tell you that you need to widen your social circle too because is not only me who knows these judgemental people are in the majority, but wherever you go it is a common sentiment. The fact that some people (of which you don't know many) do not share this opinion, doesn't mean that in the vast world population this shaming doesn't exist or it is scarce. I assure you are not and it has nothing to do with how many people I or you get to know.

 Ok whatever you say...you keep on it .

 

[ardour]

Virgin shaming is more socially acceptable. A man who remains a virgin past 25 gets flagged as a loser and a potential threat, whether openly shamed or not...and he gets lumped in with incels if he dares complain about it in the smallest way.

Making disparaging comments about a woman's sexual history on the other hand will have you condemned as an arsehole and rejected from liberal minded social circles straight away.

 

[Rainbows]

Oh, wow. Didn't realise I had to think off my bf as being a loser bc he was a virgin. honeysuckle. GOTTA GO TELL HIM.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I think the main part of the problem is that MEN (at least the men in this thread) shame themselves as virgins because they encountered some bitches who would find anything to put people down, not just virginity.
There is NOTHING wrong with being a virgin, unless you find something to make it wrong in your own eyes.

 

[DarkSelene]

Is not MY experience that made that comic or how the social consciousness agrees with it. I could tell you that you need to widen your social circle too because is not only me who knows these judgemental people are in the majority, but wherever you go it is a common sentiment. The fact that some people (of which you don't know many) do not share this opinion, doesn't mean that in the vast world population this shaming doesn't exist or it is scarce. I assure you are not and it has nothing to do with how many people I or you get to know.

Up

 

[user 139760]

Oh, wow. Didn't realise I had to think off my bf as being a loser bc he was a virgin. honeysuckle. GOTTA GO TELL HIM.

Hey, don't forget to rub it in, I read somewhere 10 minutes ago virgin shaming is the "in" thing to do ;-)

 

[Effervescent]

I don't quite understand the meaning of this.
A girl and a guy have a normal conversation. Then she leaves when he asks her for her phone number which I would interpret as showing no interest in a romantic/sexual aspect. And she isn't obligated to, just because she's had a simple human interaction with him.
I see no judgement however. This comic shows none of it, or at least has failed to show it the right way.