Me, myself and... Nope, just me

[ShybutHi]

I was wondering what peoples opinions are on doing things by yourself. Going to bars, cinema, events, stuff like that.

I keep myself busy with things generally but evenings and mainly weekends I find I do not really have anywhere to go or much to do as such. I used to have friends who I would see fairly often and do things with but nowadays things are different. All of my friends are in relationships now, a high percentage of them have kids and they don't generally go out and do things very often. They are generally all wrapped up in their own lives and families so I don't see them that often.

It does get me down sometimes as I feel a bit like the odd one out, the outcast... Oh well.

So here I am, all alone.

What I have found to be strange is the idea of just doing things by myself, going places and such.
Do you guys and girls generally go out and do things on your lonesome much?

What would your thoughts be about a guy drinking alone in a bar or pub? I am not sure if I would do that as, well, it seems almost depressing... I don't know. Maybe I am just not used to it.

 

[Outcast]

Going to the bar alone can feel weird, but really its not. I sometimes go to a popular local bar by myself and try to nab a bar seat. Just be open and sociable, maybe you will see someone you know. If you don't recognize anyone just make small talk with the bartender he/she could introduce you to some people and you could make a new group of friends.

No one will judge you for going solo. Nobody cares. I see quite a few people do it.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I never understood why you would have to go with someone to see a movie. You sit in the dark, not talking, watching a movie. You don't really need another person to do that. lol

As for bars/clubs. I don't see anything wrong with going to one by yourself. Lots of people I know do it. Sometimes they meet people they know there, but sometimes they don't.
Now, if you are going into said bar by yourself, drinking yourself drunk and making an ass out of yourself....well, I don't know if I would recommend that. That type of thing is often better when you are with a group of friends to bail you out.

 

[TheSkaFish]

It's not how I prefer to go out, but I have gone to bars and concerts alone before. I'm not a huge bar guy but I go occasionally. If there's a band lineup for the night, then it can be neat. I've gone alone to a couple nights like that. It can be enjoyable. I just go and drink and get into the music. Maybe I talk a little. I prefer to have friends with me to share experiences with but there are times when it doesn't work out for everyone's schedule, or not everyone likes the band as much as me, or other stuff and I go alone. I don't think it's weird or anything.

 

[Hearmenow2012]

I don't do a lot of things by myself but I don't have any problem with going to a gig by myself, however I'm like you because I find sitting in a bar by myself to be depressing.

 

[Case]

I don't stop myself from doing things just because I'm alone. But I would prefer more instances where I'm with another person. It just brings me more joy.

Also, I see solo eaters, movie goers, and shoppers all the time. I don't see solo living as odd. Just not preferable to me.

 

[Dreamer88]

I dont see my friends anymore because they are all in relationships or have kids or have made new friends with more in common with them. I dont mind doing certain things on my own like going shopping, but I wouldnt like to go to a bar or cinema on my own because I'd feel uncomfortable being on my own, when almost everyone was with someone and I would be too shy to talk to a stranger. I spend most evenings and weekends at home, on my own.

 

[LadyDaria]

I love going to the movies alone. I actually think that is the way it should be. When I was a kid I would go with other people and I hated it. They would talk during the movie and want to share the popcorn -- ewww. I go to the movies alone all the time.

I also travel alone. It is something else I don't mind at all. With two cavets.. as a single woman, I can't really do anything at night. Also, eating out is not an option. I either get a hotel close to fast food or, I get room service.

I haven't gone out to eat since 2010 but I don't mind it that much. Going out to eat is horrible on the calories so... since not going to eat my weight has been better.

I hate to shop with someone else. I do not get that. Shopping for me takes a ton of concentration and having someone with me, is always a problem. Typically they don't have my size or style so ... I end up going places I have no desire to go.

I do not go to bars / clubs alone. Though I find my workmates are always up for me to go with them. So if I want to go ... I know how to find people to go with me.

 

[Heisenburger]

I don't go to bars alone but I did go the the cinema alone a lot some years back. The above poster is completely right, you're sat in the dark watching a movie so socializing doesn't come into it. Other than talking about it afterwards I suppose. It's better to do (most) things alone than to not do them at all.

 

[9006]

I don't mind either, but sometimes doing things by yourself is just easier. For example you don't have to worry about doing thing the other person may not want to, or who's paying for what, etc... But I suppose that's just nit-picking.

 

[lonelyfairy]

I like to do things alone because then I can do things in my own pace. Movies, shopping, café etc. It's so important to me. I don't go to bars, though... Never, lol. I would find it very anxious for some reason, especially if 100% teetotaler. Dad keeps bugging me though ''when you will start drinking alcohol?''. There's nothing weird for doing things just by yourself. I actually see lot of people who do things alone, everywhere! Just have to be a little bit more brave, I think.

 

[ShybutHi]

Interesting responses. I think I am probably not used to doing things on my own like that all the time, so it is a little new to me... Concerning bars and pubs, things to do in the evening at weekends generally, the only times I have gone into town to bars/pubs or bar hopping on my own is when I am already drunk from playing a gig, but that was quite rare anyway. I feel strange about doing that when I am sober. lol

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hi Shy!

I wouldn't mind doing things on my own, in fact, most of the time I prefer that over doing it with a friend or friends. :S

 

[ShybutHi]

I know one or two people who have gone on holiday abroad just by themselves. I don't think I would be ready for that yet but maybe in the future as I like traveling, should get used to the idea anyway as I will probably be alone my entire life.

Anyone here gone on holiday abroad alone?

 

[Dreamer88]

Ive never been on holiday on my own, but if I actually want to start enjoying my life instead of sitting at home on my own, I'm going to have to get used to doing things on my own. I'm not ready to go on holiday or even alot of places on my own right now, but its something I'm going to have to work on

 

[Triple Bogey]

I know one or two people who have gone on holiday abroad just by themselves. I don't think I would be ready for that yet but maybe in the future as I like traveling, should get used to the idea anyway as I will probably be alone my entire life.

Anyone here gone on holiday abroad alone?

my brother once went abroad by himself.
I am not sure I could. I do go travelling for the day by myself.
I goto cinema by myself.

Nobody in my life to spend time with anyway.

 

[LadyDaria]

I know one or two people who have gone on holiday abroad just by themselves. I don't think I would be ready for that yet but maybe in the future as I like traveling, should get used to the idea anyway as I will probably be alone my entire life.
Anyone here gone on holiday abroad alone?

Two points...

(1) I have not gone abroad alone yet. But I have gone abroad. So i am working my way up to it. I would like to go to England and then do a day trip to Paris via the train.

(2) I think we are all really alone. We come into this world alone and we leave it that way too. I think the terror of being alone is a modern construct and if we had been born into a world that doesn't tell us we have to be with someone else constantly... we probably wouldn't think anything of being alone. It is valuable to learn to be alone... period. Someday you may be injured or sick or not near people you like... valuable to get comfortable in your skin.

 

[HappyYogi]

I think if you want to go somewhere you should always do it, whether you have someone to go with or not.

I think this because a) you often meet people going to these places and sometimes can strike up a conversation or maybe get to know a neighbor and b) when you do things that are joyful for you, you will make your vibration more joyful and you are more likely to attract like minded friends and lovers. So it's really important to keep the joy in your life!

If you prefer to go with someone...ask. But please don't beat yourself up if you are alone. Just do it and make the best of it and try to connect with others.

If I didn't go out to the many things I do alone I would not have the connections I do. Every relationship I have ever gotten was because I went someone on my own, took the initiative and did it.

I suggest meetup. I am an organizer of three meetups (I only share in the organizing) and it has really added fun to my life.

 

[HappyYogi]

Hi...just wanted to add about my going out alone this weekend.

I went out alone...walking my dogs and going to garage sales and going to a bicycle festival.

Each of these events I ended up chatting with someone. During the garage sale I saw a neighbor I know superficially and we chatted it up (and it was fun) and during the bicycle fest I saw one other person I know as an acquaintance and chatted up others.

It was well worth it. I didn't make a "friend" perse but I had fun, make stronger connections, and my vibration will now have this in my aura...and I will attract more of others who are of like mind.

Also just went out dog walking today. Talked to a tree trimmer today about my neighbors tree and some painters down the street. They shared they had a flea problem and I shared my solutions.

I highly recommend doing things that bring you joy for in doing those things you are more likely to meet people you like and you will be expanding your world.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I take myself out for a meal or coffee quite a bit. I find it relaxing. I have considered maybe going to see a movie, now that my youngest is a bit older. I like the alone time away from the house.