My Ex-bf feels guilty about me joining this place.

[marfles7]

Yesterday we had a family gathering and my ex joined us. We have a good friendly relationship. The thing is that I lent him my laptop for some thing he needed to do, but I didn’t log off of anything that I’m in. I’ve never had a problem with him looking at my email or stuff in general. But well, he eventually saw that I joined this place recently. His first question was wtf lol. He immediately thought it was because of him. We broke up not too long ago. So for the rest of the afternoon he was trying to make me tell him exactly why I joined a forum like this. I said I simply wanted to read and share with people who sometimes feel like crap like me. Period. But still he feels like he needs to make me “not need” to be here. And I don’t think there’s anything he could do. Not even if we get back together.

We’re not committed per se, but I have to admit that i still have feelings for him. He’s a good guy but we broke up because we barely see each other because of our jobs. But the thing is that now he’s acting like I’m suicidal or that I should be on prozac or something and seriously it’s not the case. Today he kept texting me about how I was feeling, and I was like ‘I’m fine!!!’

I don’t know. Now I feel shittier. I don’t know how to explain it. I feel he wants us back but only because he’s afraid I might kill myself. I wanted this break for us to get better not worse.

 

[mintymint]

A break up is a break up, you're gonna get back together because he didn't like the way it took? Because people got hurt? That's par for the course. Guys have a weakness for girls in "distress," and if that's the reason he's all over you then it's a bad reason to return to a relationship that has already run its course. Do you want to be back together with him?

 

[nerdygirl]

Meh. Poke him with celery and stuffs on my behalf, because I'm a little insulted. There's nothing wrong with joining this site full of awesome people. Maybe you should tell him to check us out some time and see what it's all about, before judging us and finding us lacking.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Meh. Poke him with celery and stuffs on my behalf, because I'm a little insulted. There's nothing wrong with joining this site full of awesome people. Maybe you should tell him to check us out some time and see what it's all about, before judging us and finding us lacking.

I agree. Get to poking him with assorted veggies. I'm not depressed or sad, or even lonely. This forum is a good place to just sit and talk with a few people who might be going through the same as you are. We aren't mall-goths wallowing in a sea of corpses and sorrow. Geez. Tell him to join. He might learn a thing or two. And he might even like it here. I've learned some things by being here myself.

 

[nerdygirl]

Speak for yourself. I'm going to go find a sea of corpses to wallow in.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Break up is hard for everyone...

There's a pattern I've notice in my life though...
If I continue to see or have contact with my ex...onething leads to another then we end up together again
or get really, really close to getting together again if any contacts is made.

When there's no contact..I'm simply force to move forward with my life. i might reminist about the pass here or there
but when there's no contact. I'll simply go through break up process quicker. A cleaner break up per say.

Especailly in early break up becuase your emotions are all over the place. You need a break and comfort from that.
Then you'll go through re-negociations. As good of a negociator as I am in bussiness. I totally suck at negociating
in a relationship...simply becuase I'll make decisions off of my emotions in relationships.

It takes time...don't be so hard on yourself.
Screw guilt.

I hope you feel better soon.

 

[marfles7]

A break up is a break up, you're gonna get back together because he didn't like the way it took? Because people got hurt? That's par for the course. Guys have a weakness for girls in "distress," and if that's the reason he's all over you then it's a bad reason to return to a relationship that has already run its course. Do you want to be back together with him?

I agree that guys take advantages on women when we're "unusually" sad but i don't think that's what happened. And yes, i would take him back but NOT because of what i think he thinks. Cause he didn't say it, i just got the feeling.

Meh. Poke him with celery and stuffs on my behalf, because I'm a little insulted. There's nothing wrong with joining this site full of awesome people. Maybe you should tell him to check us out some time and see what it's all about, before judging us and finding us lacking.

He didn't complain about the forum, he sort of "complain" about me being here, instead of telling him about my feelings. But sometimes you want some objectivity in what people have to say about you.

 

[Papabear]

so, he went snooping through your private history and what not on your laptop.

Sounds like he really respects you.

 

[Minus]

He didn't complain about the forum, he sort of "complain" about me being here, instead of telling him about my feelings.

Can poke him with a veggie anyway?